


The Wolf in Sheep's Clothing.

by Absolute_Trash37



Category: Wynonna Earp (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Mentions of Smut, Past Character Death, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slow Burn, Torture, chapter 12 is kind of very dark, dubious consent chapter 5, ptsd starting in chapter 12, really important to plot about half way through, thoughts of suicide in chap 12
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-25
Updated: 2018-07-06
Packaged: 2019-01-05 06:12:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 62,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12184488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Absolute_Trash37/pseuds/Absolute_Trash37
Summary: A little something I wrote during my freak out of 2x09 of Wynonna Earp.Widow Mercedes comes knocking at Nicole's door, but she's not looking for the seal at that moment in time. Little do they know, the Widows are only the first trial of many that the gang will face. How will they deal with the trauma? And even if they save Nicole from the Widow, her connection to the cult will remain to terrorize her. Will Nicole recover?No beta, all mistakes are mine and mine alone, criticism is appreciated. (Seriously.) Editing will be done after story is completed.





	1. Is That You?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just in case adding the warning didn't work, I'll also add it here.
> 
> WARNING: this chapter does contain dubious consent.

Nicole opened her door, hope spread across her face. She truly only wanted Waverly to be the one on the other side. Then again, this time in the morning, the only other person who might be knocking would be Nedley.

“Waves?” Nicole spoke as she opened the door, and when she saw who it was, her face dropped. It was Mercedes Gardner, in a large black gown, and with welts and infections along her skin. Despite looking like she should be in pain, Mercedes sported a menacing smile.

“God, Mercedes, your face.” Nicole spoke, scrunching up her nose once she realized how bad it was.

“Yeah, there's been a lot of that going around!” Mercedes pushed Nicole forcefully onto the ground. The Widow turned and shut the door calmly, as if she hadn't just shown quite a large fit of rage.

“I'd rather no one walked in on this.” Mercedes told the officer, who managed to scramble up before Mercedes grabbed her by the hair and smashed her against the ground. “The path leads to the law. And you're the one closest to the heir.” Mercedes pinned Nicole to the ground, before she shot out her paralyzing fog. 

“This body is failing me, and I need a new one anyways, who better than the woman who has the seal and a way to hurt Wynonna Earp.” Mercedes listened bemusedly as she heard the officer attempt to protest, despite her frozen state. All Nicole wanted was for Waverly to stay safe, even if they were fighting.

“Oh, shush. This will only hurt a little,” Mercedes mounted the red head, then placed her silver claws inside the girl's mouth. “Then a lot.” The Widow snapped Nicole's neck, much like she did with Mercedes, before taking the face from the body. It took the demon mere minutes to slip from Mercedes and into the officer. She sighed approvingly.

“That's much better, fitting. But now, where to put you...” The Widow asked while buttoning up a shirt from Nicole's wardrobe. She had just finished putting Nicole's barely moving body in the closet when she heard a knock at the door. Nicole wanted to warn whoever it was, but the woman was too weak and in too great pain to do so.

“Waves?” The Widow asked, just as the actual officer had.

“Nicole,” Waverly breathed out in relief, hugging the officer. Nicole remembered that Beth mentioned the couple was in an argument. “I'm so sorry, that text was so uncalled for. It was so mean.” Waverly mumbled into Nicole's shoulder. The taller woman started stroking Waverly's hair while a large and dark smile appearing on her lips. 

“I was the one in the wrong, you were right. Waverly, I messed up, and I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have done that. It was so shitty of me.” Nicole spoke after a slight moment of hesitation. Waverly pulled away to look Nicole in the eye, who then wore a sympathetic frown.

“I was right!? That text was awful, Nicole! None of it was true. I hurt you too, I kept you out of Black Badge, you kept the DNA results.” Waverly explained. “You were angry and so was I. And I'm sorry, Nicole, I'm so royally sorry.”

“I'm sorry too, can we go out for breakfast and talk more? Maybe go to the Homestead afterwards?” Nicole asked.

“That sounds perfect. But before we go, I need to tell you something,” Waverly paused, she took a shaky breath before looking at Nicole.

“I... I kissed Rosita. We were drunk, I was angry and I know that's no excuse, but I regretted it as soon as it happened, so did she, and I completely understand if you hate me again, I would too, just please know that I'm sorry, and I'm not the nicest person in Purgatory, my sash should be revoked, and I'm so so-” Nicole placed her finger to Waverly's lips. It effectively ended the shorter girl's rambling. The Widow gave a sad smile, knowing it was best for her plan to stay close with Waverly.

“It's okay... I mean, it's not, I'm kind of angry, and so were you. But I understand. Now how about we get to the diner.” Nicole said,grabbing her jacket from the coat hook and shutting the door behind her. Nicole started to walk down the stairs, just to look back to see Waverly was still on the porch. 

“What's wrong?” Nicole asked. 

“You always lock the door, even if you're home.” Waverly said, and she looked at Nicole curiously. The red head shrugged. 

“I... guess I forgot.” The Widow climbed back up the stairs and took out the keys from her pocket to lock the door. Once she placed the keys back in her pocket, Waverly smiled and took Nicole's hand as they walked to Nicole's cruiser together. 

The Widow resisted the urge to laugh at how easily she fooled the one closest to Nicole.


	2. Acting Strange

After breakfast, Nicole lead Waverly out of the diner, when her phone started to ring.

“Hello?” Nicole spoke casually. “The station? Of course, Nedley, no problem.” Nicole hung up and saw Waverly had furrowed her brows in concern.

“You okay?” The short girl asked, worried about Nicole. Not only did Nicole forget to lock her door, she didn't use the word “Sheriff” like usual. Waverly knew how highly Nicole held her superior, and how serious Nicole was about home security because of the cases she'd seen with break in's. 

“Yeah, why?” Nicole asked, trying to sound genuine, but the Widow was worried the tiny Earp was onto her. 

“You never leave the door unlocked, you usually check twice, actually. And you never call Nedley 'Nedley'. Always “Sheriff Nedley” or “Sheriff” I guess... I don't know, you're just acting weird.” Waverly said, and the Widow immediately thought of a retort to shut up the tiny woman. Nicole only called the Sheriff “Nedley” when she was talking to others about the man in question.

“And kissing Rosita isn't?” Nicole was clearly agitated, and Waverly felt awful all over again. She kicked herself for thinking Nicole was fine with it. Waverly cheated on her girlfriend, and that girlfriend acted like it didn't matter, and it so clearly did. 

“I'm sorry Nicole... I should've thought.” Waverly told the red head remorsefully, and her girlfriend nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, maybe you should have.” Nicole walked to the cruiser. “I'll give you a ride to the station, you're probably needed at Black Badge.” The Widow realized she had to make up with the Earp again if she wanted to get to the homestead, a chance to kill the heir. 

“Look, I'm sorry I snapped, you don't deserve that.” Nicole told her. “I need to comprehend this all. It's a lot to take in.” Nicole admitted, and Waverly made her way to the cruiser. 

“I get it, I should have realized that before.” Waverly acknowledged before she climbed into the passenger's side of the vehicle. The drive to the police station was quiet, neither uttered a word, and the police radio never came on.

“I'm sorry, Waves.” Nicole spoke softly after she turned off the engine. “I just need time, but I think we'll be okay. At least you didn't sleep with her.” Nicole looked to see Waverly nod in agreement. 

 

“Thank you, Nicole. I just don't want to fight anymore.” Nicole placed a hand on Waverly's thigh and squeezed gently, confusing Waverly again, Nicole always went to reach for her hand.

“Neither do I. It just takes time.” Nicole pulled away and exited the car, followed by Waverly, who knew something was up with her girlfriend. She just had no clue what it was. 

Because it couldn't just be the fact that Waverly kissed Rosita, the Earp knew it. Nicole was understanding for the most part, and the officer internalized her anger as often as she could. Waverly just wished Nicole would tell her what was seriously going on, what was leading her to snap and be more vocal about her anger.

Waverly dropped it for now and enter the station. The Earp went straight to the BBD offices and entered to see Wynonna and Dolls at the table. Wynonna with a file and donut in hand, feet swung onto the table comfortably and Dolls, hunched over a file and looking at crime scene photos.

“Hey, Wave, about time you showed up. What held Ms. Punctuality up?” Waverly placed her jacket on the back of a chair as she sat down. 

“I was reconciling with Nicole. We went to breakfast.” Wynonna threw her legs off the table and gave all her attention to the tiny Earp.

“Is that all you two did?” The nosy heir implied cheekily. 

“Yes.” Waverly looked down. “I made things worse and Nicole's acting weird.” Dolls quirked an eyebrow.

“What do you mean weird?” Wynonna asked. 

“It's nothing, I'm just being nit-picky.” Wynonna rolled her eyes.

“I might not know Haughthead as well as you but if she's being weird, at all, something's wrong.” Wynonna spoke casually.

“Yeah, knowing I kissed someone else is definitely a reason to be weird.” Waverly spat out and Wynonna opened her eyes in shock. 

“That's not chea-” Wynonna processed. “Wait, why would you kiss someone else? Who is the someone else!?” Wynonna was shocked. 

“Nicole and I were-are- I don't know- fighting and I got drunk, and I kissed Rosita. I know it was wrong and so did she but we still kissed, and I feel awful, and Nicole is pissed.” Dolls held up his hand to stop Waverly's rambling. 

“Look, maybe Haught and I can talk, she'll drink, she'll rant, you two will get good again.” Waverly appreciated the fact that Wynonna knew that she wasn't allowed to drink now. She was taking the pregnancy thing seriously, and it made Waverly's heart melt. 

“Thanks Wynonna.” Waverly smiled and sat at the desk. “So, what case do we have today?” 

***  
As the others talked in Black Badge, Nicole sat down at her desk casually. After a little while, the Widow started to look at the items on her desk, unsure of where the seal would be hidden. She started searching through drawers, and lifting files to find the ring, wherever it could be. 

Doc arrived and the Widow instantly picked up pen and began to write inside a folder. Doc tipped his hat as he passed.

“Ms. Haught.”

“Hi Doc.” Nicole said kindly before he entered the BBD offices. Shortly after, Nedley emerged from his office. 

“Officer Haught, keep an eye on things, I need to go out on a call.” Nicole gave a smile and a nod. 

“Sure thing, Nedley.” The Sheriff quirked a brow at the officer's remark. When he left the station, Nicole made a b-line for the man's office. The Widow knew that Nedley was the most likely to have the seal aside from the woman who's body she stole. 

“Now... if I were a seal, where would I be hid?” Nicole looked through the desk and the filing cabinet. She didn't find anything other than casual, boring, normal police work.

“How? I called upon Constance herself! Where is my seal?” Nicole hissed to herself angrily, hunched over Nedley's desk.

“Nicole?” The Widow turned around in shock to see Waverly standing in the doorway. “What are you doing in Nedley's office?” 

“I was looking for an important case file, I think Nedley accidentally took it with a report.” The Widow prided herself on the quick response. She found it more difficult to pinpoint the officer's personality than Mercedes'. The Gardner woman was a humorous bitch, the officer was a different tale, she was more difficult to imitate, and those she was close with were harder to fool. 

“It doesn't matter,” Nicole piped up. “Let's get out of here.” Nicole said with a smile, before she walked up and took Waverly's hand, leading the Earp out of the office. Waverly noticed that Nicole felt cold, really cold. 

Waverly knew Nicole's shift wasn't even close to over. Now Waverly knew something other than relationship issues was going on.


	3. Blame It On The Cat

Waverly and Nicole pulled up to the homestead slowly. The officer looked at the house with a glimmer in her eye, as if she had never stepped foot on the property before, which confused Waverly. 

“Nicole?” Waverly asked the officer, and the red head looked over nervously. 

“What is it Baby?” Nicole asked. 

“You sure you're okay?” After a moment, Nicole nodded in response. The couple exited the car and walked into the house tiredly. 

“I got a radio TV set up in my room, movie?” Waverly asked. Nicole smiled and kicked off her boots.

“Movie.” They both climbed the stairs and Nicole waited for Waverly to lead the way, not knowing where the girl's bedroom lay. 

The two sat down and Waverly channel surfed until they found a movie. It was old, and probably pretty bad, but Waverly needed an excuse to just curl up and have some alone time with Nicole. Especially after realizing she wasn't really an Earp.

“Are we okay?” Waverly piped up suddenly, scared to look at Nicole's reaction.

“Maybe... I hope so.” Waverly waited for the usual all-mighty romantic comment that typically followed moments like these, but it never came.

They watched the movie in silence, until Waverly snapped.

“Okay, I can't do this anymore.” Waverly shot up and turned off the TV, before she turned to look at her girlfriend. “What's going on? This is more than us, I know it. What's going on?” 

“It's personal.” Nicole muttered out, not sure how to respond without giving it away.

“And I thought we were the type of relationship that shared.” Waverly's eyes would have probably broken Nicole, but the Widow wasn't sure. 

“You have enough on your plate as it is.” Nicole leaned forward, meeting Waverly's gaze. “Just let me figure this out, okay?” That wasn't quite what Waverly needed to hear, but it was enough. 

“Okay.”

“I need to go. I have to work early in the morning.” Nicole stood and walked towards the door. “See you tomorrow.” Waverly gave a sad smile. 

“Yeah, see you tomorrow.” Waverly watched longingly as Nicole left. 

The red head changed from the clothes in Nicole's wardrobe to the black wedding gown she held dearly.

“Where has my annoying whore of a sister gone?” Nicole asked, standing in her host's home. 

“Right behind you, sister.” Nicole turned to see Beth, sporting the same gown. “I see you've changed your skin again. You really do have a thing for red-heads.” Nicole rolled her eyes at her sister. 

“Shut up.” The red head sat on her couch. “Have you any luck finding the seal, traitor?” Beth asked standing in front of the other Widow. 

“Oh, stop complaining, you were weak.” Beth groaned. “And, to answer your question, no, I have not found the seal. Tucker will be dead within minutes though, so that's a positive.” Beth explained lamely.

“Hmm. I haven't had any luck either, all I know is that the seal is in the hands of the law. I thought it was her-” Nicole motioned up and down herself, “But I've been unsuccessful in tracking it down.” 

“Maybe we should start working together again, after all.” Beth complained, as a whimper echoed from the bedroom.

“What was that?” Asked Beth curiously.

“You know how Mercedes has survived much longer than Beth? Yeah, this one is proving to be as equally challenging.” Nicole followed Beth into Nicole's room, and opened the walk in closet. The true Nicole laid limply in the closet, nothing more than faceless meat and pink flesh, still clothed in the blue blouse and white jeans from when the Widow attacked her. Nicole whimpered as much as she could, probably trying to call for help, despite not having a mouth to do so. The Widow smiled at what she considered to be nothing but a meat bag that her host once wore. 

“Oh, quiet dear. No one can hear you... and no one is coming to save you.” The Widow lifted her dress and landed a swift kick to Nicole's mid-section, making the woman groan.

“Why is their pain so amusing?” Beth asked. “Never mind, it's because they're so... fragile.”Beth placed one of her heels against the woman's head, making the true Nicole squeak in pain.

“So true, but let us go search for the seal that keeps us from my betrothed.” The Widow shut the door as Beth backed away.

“YOUR betrothed!? He's MY betrothed!” Nicole groaned in protest. 

“Well, we'll see the truth once we free him from his prison.” The two Widows vanished, and Nicole whimpered in the closet. The pain was unbearable, and what little thought she could keep hold of, was that Waverly was coming. 

All Nicole knew was that Waverly was coming for her. Soon... soon. Waverly was coming.

The Widows appeared in the middle of the police station, veils on. The two used their fog breath and froze the four police officers who had taken the night shift.

“Why would anyone choose to do that for a living?” Nicole asked Beth, truly curious as to why anyone would choose to stay up at all hours of the night to do nothing but sit at a desk and wait for someone to commit a crime.

“Quiet sister. Let's just find the seal. Remember, they can still hear us.” Beth and Nicole marched into the Sheriff's office. Nicole froze Nedley as soon as they walked in. 

“Now, where is my seal?” Nicole growled out as she and Beth searched the office together. 

* * *

While the Widow's were gone, Waverly walked up to Nicole's door. The young Earp knocked twice, waiting for Nicole to come answer. 

“Nicole, please? Wynonna knows where the third seal is, and she asked me to warn you. Please open up.” Waverly waited for her girlfriend to come answer when she heard a low and scared “meow” from Calamity Jane. Waverly jiggled the door handle just to realize that it was unlocked. Again, that was not like Nicole.

“Nicole? Baby?” Waverly walked into the apartment, weary of what she might find. Waverly jumped into a defensive position as she heard a creak.

“Waves?” Nicole came out of her bedroom, closing the door behind her gently. “What are you doing here so late?” 

“Oh, Nicole, thank God.” Waverly rushed up and hugged her girlfriend tightly. Waverly pulled away and looked at her girlfriend sadly.

“Waverly, what's going on?” Nicole asked, clearly confused by the situation.

“Wynonna knows where the third seal is. She has someone protecting it.” Nicole's ace lit up.

“That's great news!” Nicole cheered happily. Then she saw Waverly's face. “Isn't it?” Waverly shook her head.

“She wants to break it. She wants to free Bulshar.” Nicole's face lit up again, ecstatic that her husband would be freed. The Widow remembered the skin she was inhabiting currently and was worried she'd blown her cover. She forced her face to drop into a confused frown. Despite the Widow not wanting the youngest Earp to catch her reaction, she did.

“What? Why?” Nicole asked, faking hurt and shock well. 

“She wants to kill Bulshar, end the curse that way.” Now, Nicole's hurt was genuine. That goddamn Earp heir wanted to take her husband away, just like that ass-hole Wyatt.

“Oh God, Waves... do you think she can do it?” Nicole asked, curious for the safety of her husband. Waverly shook her head tears in her eyes.

“She's going to get herself killed.” Waverly fell into Nicole's arms as she started to cry. Nicole shushed Waverly comfortingly, as a menacing smile appeared, along with a twinkle in her eye. Nicole wouldn't have to do anything, Wynonna would bring Bulshar back all on her own, and the Widow would have a front row seat. 

As the red head held Waverly, a faint tapping sound started from Nicole's bedroom. Followed by the occasional whimper.

“What's that?” Waverly asked, pulling away slightly to look towards the source of the noise. 

“It's probably just that damn cat.” Nicole said with a sad smile, before leading Waverly to her couch. After Waverly was seated, the woman turned and entered her bedroom, the tapping becoming louder before the door was shut again. The Widow opened the closet door to see the faceless flesh of Nicole Haught lifting up her hand weakly before letting it fall to the ground again. “Shut up!” The Widow hissed at Nicole, kicking the meat sack. It caused the real Nicole to curl in on herself and whimper slightly

The Widow shut the closet door and exited the bedroom, closing the door behind her gently. Nicole huffed out a laugh and pointed her thumb to the room behind her. “She just needed to be fed.” Nicole sat next to Waverly, pulling the Earp close. 

“Ignore her, she's being weird too.” Nicole finished as Waverly leaned in and rested her head on the taller woman's shoulder. 

The Widow made a note-to-self, blame it on the cat. It was a much less elaborate excuse than most.


	4. How Dare You?

Nicole sported her gown inside the Gardner mansion. She and Beth discussed the situation at hand, unable to make a choice.

“Just because the heir wants to break the third seal, it doesn't mean she will. And it doesn't mean she can.” Nicole debated. 

“So, you clearly agree that we can't wait for the likes of the heir to make the first move.” Beth suggested. 

“Obviously.” Nicole paused as she thought over possible plans. “Wait a moment! I think I know what to do.” Nicole began to pace excitedly.

“I've got it.” Nicole gripped Beth's shoulders forcefully. “They wouldn't let Nicole die. Especially Waverly.”

“What are you suggesting, sister?” The other Widow asked curiously. 

“I'm suggesting that you appear in the open, a trap, we'll all go to dinner tonight, you can attack us, and capture me. You order the seal be given to you, or you'll kill me. Tell them to meet you at The old barn a couple miles south of town. The one that used to be the chapel.” Nicole prided herself on the solution. 

“Oh my! The one Bulshar and I got married in!” Beth squealed happily.

“No! The chapel Bulshar and I got married in!” Nicole argued. The two growled before they both snapped their fingers, disappearing to somewhere new, somewhere away from the other. Nicole appeared outside the police station, in uniform.

The officer realized it was nearing the evening, so she entered and knocked on the BBD office doors. 

“Hey. Want anyone want to go out tonight? My treat, food and drink.” Nicole offered, walking up behind Waverly and swinging her arms over her playfully, making the young woman smile.

“Someone got paid.” Wynonna piped up, before she took a bite of her donut. “I'm in.” She mumbled with a full mouth.

“I never say no to a free drink.” Doc's raspy voice followed. Dolls nodded in agreement. 

“Thanks, Sweetie.” Waverly said turning so she could place a kiss on Nicole's cheek.

“We'll be finished in about ten minutes, Thanks Nicole.” Dolls said holding up a file which meant they just had to clean up. 

“Same here, meet you all outside.” Nicole said before leaving, a large smile on her face. The plan was already in motion and it took no effort at all.

They all walked to the restaurant together. Most of them were joking, and the Widow laughed when considered appropriate. That's how the night continued. At the restaurant when Wynonna tried to order a beer and Waverly corrected it to water, laughter. They were all having fun, and the Widow resisted laughing at the ease of the plan. They began to walk from the restaurant to the station, where all their cars were, but as they laughed, Beth did her part, the two men reached for their weapons as the Widow appeared suddenly.

Beth threw Dolls and Doc aside first. Nicole prepared to shoot, but she, Waverly and Wynonna tag-teamed the evil woman instead. Beth swept her leg under Wynonna's knee, sending the heir flying onto her back. Waverly rushed to her sister's side, and with the lack of help, Nicole was apprehended by the other Widow. Beth held one silver claw up to the officer's throat, threatening the four others in front of them.

“Nicole!” Waverly attempted to rush to her girlfriend's side, but Beth pressed her claw harder onto Nicole's neck, who whimpered for effect.

“Give me the third seal by midnight or the friendly neighbourhood ginger dies slowly and painfully.” Beth threatened. 

“Let her go!” Waverly yelled as she charged forward, only for Dolls to hold her back. 

“Waverly, please.” Nicole begged as a tear slipped down her cheek. “She'll kill me, Waverly, please.” Nicole begged as Beth pulled them even further away. 

“The barn two miles south from Purgatory! Midnight!” Beth shrieked before they disappeared.

“Nicole, NO!” Waverly broke from Dolls' grasp too late, and her girlfriend was gone. Waverly ran forward before she managed to halt herself. She covered her mouth with her hands before she fell to her knees, horrified for the fate that might await the love of her life. 

* * *

Nicole swept off her gown as they appeared in the barn. 

“Bravo, I liked the water works.” Beth applauded. Nicole nodded proudly. 

“I threw them in for good measure, Waverly Earp lost it, they will give us the seal, no doubt about that.” The red head prided herself. “The plan will work perfectly, Beth, I knew it.” Nicole nodded. 

“I never had doubt,” Beth said calmly, turning away and walking from Nicole. “This time.” Nicole squinted dumbfound. 

“Wait, what do you mean THIS TIME!?” Nicole asked, following Beth.

* * *

“This isn't happening, this isn't happening.” Waverly kept repeating as she nervously paced through BBD.

“We can't give them the seal.” Dolls spoke plainly, at least he tried to help. 

“They'll kill Nicole if we don't!” Waverly shouted defensively at the Deputy-Marshall. 

“Ms. Haught is strong, she might escape from the Widow's clutches.” Doc suggested, which was followed by a slap from Waverly. 

“Waverly! Calm down!” Wynonna raised her voice to try to get through to her sister. Wynonna cupped Waverly's cheek with one hand and held her shoulder with the other. “Calm down. We aren't letting Nicole die, okay?”

“The seal... Wynonna please.” Waverly begged.

“Waverly, we aren't ready for Bulshar to be freed. If they figure out how to break the seal-”

“IF! Wynonna, IF. They might not figure it out.” Waverly pleaded desperately, but the heir shook her head.

“We'll figure it out, a fake or something, but we'll get her out of there.” Wynonna insisted.

“They'll know! Beth and Mercedes, they'll kill her.” Wynonna looked at Doc, who was clearly trying not to freak out, his immortality was at stake.

“Doc?” Wynonna asked and the man snapped his gaze from the ground to her. “It's your call.” Wynonna told him, it confused everyone aside from the cowboy. 

“Until... very recently, all I've ever done is watch out for myself. But in this situation, this won't kill me immediately, but if we don't give up the seal, Ms. Haught will die...” Doc placed his hat on his chest solemnly and sighed. Wynonna was hoping he'd be selfish and say no. If Bulshar was free, they'd all die. 

“Give them the seal...” Wynonna bit her lip and looked down angrily as Waverly sighed with relief. 

“Okay.” Wynonna agreed lamely, with her own plan to save Nicole already made. 

* * * 

Doc fiddled with his ring on the trip to the old barn, almost a goodbye before parting with his immortality. Wynonna and Dolls were both silent, unsure if this was the best idea. Waverly stared at her shotgun, wanting to put each round into Beth's skull.

“I'm coming Baby, I'm coming.” Waverly now shifted her gaze to the barn that finally came into view.

“What time is it?” She asked desperately, regretting that she left her watch at home. 

“It's barely eleven thirty. We'll get there.” Dolls answered calmly, he was managing to keep his head on straight and Waverly appreciated it. 

“Alright.” The young Earp muttered wearily. This was Nicole's life on the line, even if she had been acting different lately, it was still Nicole. Kind, funny, observant, innocent Nicole. The red head seemed to still get in the middle of Black Badge's problems despite the fact that Waverly kept Nicole out of Black Badge to avoid that.

“Hurry, I need to know that she's okay.” Waverly pleaded. 

“She'll be okay Waverly, we'll get there.” Wynonna spoke flatly, a hand on Peacemaker. 

After what felt like hours for Doc and Waverly, they arrived at the barn. Dolls and Wynonna exited the truck and Waverly followed eagerly. She would have run into the barn, had not Dolls grabbed her arm to hold her in place. The three waited for the cowboy, who stepped out of the truck solemnly with a heavy sigh.

“Let us go save Ms. Haught.” Doc grabbed his pistols and the four Black Badge Agents walked to the barn. Dolls lead and tore open the doors once they got there. 

“Nicole!” Waverly cried out, her girlfriend laid weakly on the floor, barely conscious. Beth hovered above the red head with a cruel smile on her face Waverly tried to lunge, only to be stopped by Dolls.

“Give me my seal,” Beth began, she grabbed the other Widow by the collar of her shirt and yanked her to her feet. Nicole pretended to be so weak that the only things that kept her standing were Beth's hands, one grabbing her shirt from the back, the other pressed to her throat. “Or the good officer is as good as dead.” 

“Waverly please...” Nicole whimpered pleadingly.

“Doc, give her the seal!” Waverly begged frantically, desperate to save Nicole. The man hesitantly slipped the ring from his finger, but Wynonna put her arm out in front of him. She stopped Doc from giving the ring to the Widow.

“Wynonna, what are you doing!?” Waverly was hurt by the action, she believed her sister had just chosen the seal over Nicole's life. 

“I'm sorry, Waverly.” Wynonna said calmly, and Dolls came and grabbed the young Earp from behind, holding her out of Wynonna's way. The heir drew Peacemaker and aimed at Nicole's head, regretfully. The officer seemed to quickly snap out of her weakened state at the unexpected action. 

“Wynonna what are you doing?” Nicole tried to fight free of Beth's hold to make it realistic. “Wynonna, no!” Nicole pleaded.

“We can't give her the seal, Nicole.” Wynonna turned the safety of the gun off sadly. “Anything killed with Peacemaker will come back as a Revenant once the heir dies.” Wynonna heavily explained.  
“We'll figure something out, and you'll come back. We'll get you back, Haught.”

Peacemaker began to glow blue and the Widow sporting Nicole faked intense fear. 

“No, Wynonna, don't do this! Wynonna, Wynonna, stop, please! Please Wynonna, don't do this.” Beth was prepared to let Nicole pull her forward if they had to. 

Nicole's behaviour confused Wynonna. The heir realized that Nicole wouldn't want to die, but normally the officer would have understood. Nicole would have kept her doubt inside and she would have tried to say goodbye to Waverly. Wynonna even expected Nicole to argue about being brought back. That was the type of person Nicole had proven herself to be. Wynonna would never have expected Nicole to plead for her not to do this. 

“WYNONNA!” Waverly begged, tears streaked down her cheeks. The heir looked at her sister briefly, but it was enough. After she saw the desperation in Waverly's eyes, she had to lower the gun. The blue glow of the barrel faded away.

“I'd bring her back.” Wynonna excused, before she looked sadly at Doc and nodded, despite his puppy dog eyes.  
“I'm sorry Nicole,” The Earp admitted genuinely before Doc handed Wynonna the ring. The heir and the Widows neared each other slowly, Beth still held onto Nicole tightly until they reached Wynonna. The Earp handed the ring over, and Nicole broke free from Beth's grip.

“At last, our husband will be free, and we will be reunited once again! After years!” Beth let out a triumphant squeal as Wynonna aimed Peacemaker at her. The Widow shook her head and vanished, the distraction kept anyone from spotting Nicole's smile. In their shock, Waverly broke away from Dolls and rushed into Nicole's embrace.

The woman pulled from her girlfriend and glared at Wynonna.

“You were going to shoot me?” Nicole asked angrily. The Widow did not want this host ruined by one of Peacemaker's bullets too.

“I'm sorry, Nicole. I was trying to think of a way to get you out of this, and to keep her from getting the seal.” Nicole shook her head angrily.

“Thank you far saving me, but now we have the seal, and I'm free, no one had to get threatened.” Nicole argued, Wynonna caught the slip.

“What do you mean? She has the seal, not us. I gave it to Beth to let you go.” Wynonna stated Nicole hid her fear and furrowed her brow.  
“Wynonna, stop.” Waverly replied, a look of disgust on her face.

“I meant she, didn't I say she?” Nicole asked Waverly.

“You said “we” and you're acting different.” Wynonna looked over Nicole wearily.

“Yeah, and you just tried to shoot me, so who are you to judge?” Nicole walked out of the old building coldly. Waverly shook her head at Wynonna.

“Do you know what she must have just gone through? I can't believe you, Wynonna.” Waverly jogged out after Nicole, furious. 

“Nicole,” Waverly called out to the red head as she tried to catch up. “Nicole, please, wait!” Waverly managed to place a hand on Nicole's shoulder. 

“I'm sorry, Wynonna was out of line.” Waverly told her. Nicole shook her head.

“Yeah, well, I'm still pissed. I can't deal with her, she's too reckless.” Nicole began to walk again. 

“Where are you going?!” Waverly called out pleadingly.  
“Purgatory.” Nicole's response was simple and plain.

“You can't walk!” Waverly called out.

“I'll call you later.” Nicole huffed, before she continued her route. The red head walked for about ten minutes when the BBD truck slowed down. They waited to see if she wanted a ride. All Nicole did, was give Wynonna the middle finger, and the truck slowly passed. Once it was out of view, Nicole snapped her fingers. 

The Widow appeared in the Gardner mansion happily.

“I believe my plan went quite well.” Nicole boasted, only for Beth to hold up the ring.

“Sister, for once, I agree!” The two Widows squealed together victoriously.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not going to lie, I wrote this because I needed a filler chapter. I kind of like it though.


	5. If They Knew!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just in case adding it didn't work 
> 
> WARNING: this chapter involves dubious consent.

The Earp heir walked into the station the next morning, just to see Nicole was already there. 

“Nicole, can we talk?”Wynonna asked quietly.

“So you can try to shoot me again? No, I'm good.” Nicole went back to try to find a file and ignored Wynonna. Inside, Nicole was cheering and she wanted to rub the fact that she had the seal in Wynonna's face.

“Haught, I'm sorry. I jut thought that any way to get you out of there reasonably okay would be better than giving up the seal. And I thought... If I die, for a couple seconds, it'd bring you back, I'd kill Bulshar, and you'd live out the rest of your life like a normal person. I'm sorry I didn't think about you.” Nicole glanced down to Peacemaker momentarily. If she and Beth had that gun, they'd be Gods. The Widow decided to make a plan of her own, and all she had to do was distract the Earp heir long enough.

“You do realize that people have genuine and scared reactions when they think they're going to die, don't you?” Wynonna listened to Nicole's response coldly. The heir truly expected Nicole to be somewhat noble in the situation, even expected Nicole to tell her not to give up the seal. 

“How about we go to the bar, play darts or something, you can drink and complain and unless a can of truthfulness on my ass.” Without a thought, Nicole nodded, knowing a bar was the perfect situation to steal from the heir. 

“Alright, a drink doesn't sound awful after getting kidnapped.” Nicole admitted with a nod. 

“After your shift.” Wynonna nodded a farewell and made her way to the Black Badge offices.

Nicole “worked” for about four more hours, which meant the Widow scribbled, invaded officer Haught's privacy, and drove around town on “patrol”. After work, Nicole changed and met Wynonna outside the station.

“Ready to go get wasted, Haughtstuff?” The Widow shook her head with a laugh. 

“Whatever you say Wynonna.” The two made their way to the truck when someone called for them. They looked back to see Waverly jog forward 

“Where are you two going?” The young Earp asked quizzically. 

“We're just going to Shorty's no drinking for me, I swear.” Wynonna spat out the promise before her sister could demand it. 

“I'll meet you at my place tonight, okay?” Nicole checked. She placed a casual hand on Waverly's shoulder and gave a reassuring smile.

“Okay. I'll see you then.” Waverly gave a smile as she watched Wynonna and Nicole wander away.

* * *

The two arrived at Shorty's and ordered Nicole a shot. The red head drank it and faked a sour reaction. 

“Six darts, Rosita.” Wynonna slammed a twenty on the bar. The Earp heir took one look and Nicole and smirked. “And another shot.”

Once the shot was delivered, Nicole downed it and faked another reaction.

“So is your plan to get me hammered until I forgive you?” Nicole asked as Wynonna threw her first dart.

“Maybe, or just drunk enough so I can beat you in every round.” Wynonna answered while Nicole threw her dart. It nearly landed a bulls-eye. The action shocked Wynonna. “Haught damn, I knew you had killer aim, but I thought that was just with a gun.” Wynonna praised, before she threw a dart carefully. It landed just below Nicole's and Wynonna groaned. 

“Rosita, make it vodka!” Wynonna called out to the bar tender as Nicole landed another dart into a twenty. “Haughtstuff, you ain't winning tonight.” Wynonna cautiously aimed her last dart, before she released the barrel and sent it flying. The Earp heir let out a cheer as she hit no less than a centimeter away from the bulls-eye. Nicole drank her shot and gagged. The Widow knew she had to start acting a little drunk now. She threw her dart and it barley hit a twelve, hat secured Wynonna's victory.

“Haught went down hill fast!” Wynonna cheered proudly, hitting Nicole's shoulder victoriously. 

Five shooters later, the Widow struggled to fake drunkenness. Nicole stumbled around and used Wynonna as a stand. Nicole just wanted to get out of there sooner rather than later. 

“Wynonna! You're great you know that?” Nicole swung her arm around the Earp's neck, she tried not to barf by just being in the same area as the heir. The action made Wynonna confused, Nicole was a cute drunk, yeah, but this was different than when they went to confront Jonas or when they were drinking in Nicole's office. Nicole had been weird for a while, and Wynonna was worried about her.

“Okay, Haught-rod, let's go. Time to go.” Wynonna ushered Nicole out of the bar and into the truck.

“Wynonna EARP!” Nicole spoke suddenly but happily, like she was making a joke out of it. The heir just rolled her eyes and finished her road to Nicole's house. Thy finally pulled up and parked in Nicole's driveway. Wynonna hobbled over to Nicole's side of the car to help her to the door. Nicole laughed childishly.

“You walk like a penguin! And your belly is big!” Nicole laughed even more, causing Wynonna to think she was dealing with a toddler. Once Nicole was at her front door, she threw her arms around Wynonna's waist for a hug. 

Wynonna mumbled a protest and was too preoccupied to notice Nicole's hand snaked down to grip Peacemaker's hilt.

By the time Wynonna pried Nicole away, the red head had slipped Peacemaker up her sleeve. Nicole acted so casual that Wynonna made sure Nicole went inside before the Earp heir walked away. Without Peacemaker.

* * *

The Widow called Waverly to her house around ten. She waited for her to arrive patiently, another ingenious plan to break the Earps already in motion. With the gun already in the Gardner mansion, Nicole was proud of how easily everything had turned out. If she could break Waverly as well as the heir, everything would fit into place. 

Who likes to keep things pristine, when it's so fun to watch them splinter and crack?

A knock came to the door, and the Widow knew that she had the upper hand again, another Earp just walking into the cage. The Widow even moved the real Nicole into the shed out back for the night. This plan would have to be perfect.

“Nicole?” Waverly opened the door and entered her girlfriend's home. 

“Kitchen.” Nicole called out innocently. 

Waverly entered to see Nicole had poured them both a glass of wine. The young Earp gave an amused smile and walked forward casually. She picked up her glass and had a sip. 

“Did you and Wynonna have fun?” She asked simply, she didn't want to push her girlfriend into being uncomfortable after the hell she'd been through.

“It was good. We mainly played darts and pool. I only had a couple shots.” Nicole sighed. “There are times when I just can't deal with Wynonna, but I know she feels the same. We both mean well, and I think I forgot it.” The Widow choked on her words, but knew that this is something the officer would say.  
“Plus, we both love you. And you know that, right?” Waverly nodded proudly.

“I know, and I'm glad you two are kind of getting along again.” Waverly spoke with a twinkle in her eye. She finished her glass.

“Let's stop talking about Wynonna.” Nicole suggested, making her way across the dining table to where Waverly sat. The red head embraced her from behind and placed a kiss on the crook of Waverly's neck. The brunette purred in response.

“I wish we had moments like this more often.” Waverly hummed. She leaned her head back and let her lips meet Nicole. The Widow took Waverly's hands and lead her to the bedroom as she gave a kiss here and there. The thought of being unfaithful to her beloved husband made the Widow sick. But the thought of the Earps being distracted and guilt ridden made the event manageable. 

The two women removed each others clothing quickly, and the Widow easily took control of the younger woman. Nicole laid Waverly on the bed and made quick work of her. The Widow made little effort to make this an enjoyable experience for the Earp. If Waverly wasn't so important, than the Widow would have killed her by now.

Waverly knew this wasn't how Nicole usually acted. Nicole always wanted Waverly's consent, hesitated until Waverly gave a nod or a smile. She never bore into her immediately or so forcefully. Waverly wanted to ask Nicole to stop or to slow down, but the smaller girl stayed silent. She feared even if she asked Nicole to stop, she wouldn't.

The sex was tedious and lengthy, but eventually the Widow had her way and the two laid side by side, Waverly on her side and faced away from the other woman.

“How was it?” Nicole asked lazily. All Waverly could think about is how that question should have been asked much sooner. 

“You... you were a little rough.” Waverly admitted quietly. Nicole pulled Waverly closer, And placed a kiss on the base of her neck. 

“I'm sorry, baby. I just get so passionate when I'm with you..” Nicole explained, not satisfying Waverly at all. 

“Yeah well, you can usually control yourself better then that.” 

“I've just... I've been going through hell the last couple days, and I guess I let that out on you... I'm so sorry Waves.” Nicole apologized. The Earp turned to face her girlfriend. 

“I hope you realize that's no excuse.” Waverly ordered coldly, before taking a deep breath. “But I know you're not yourself right now, and I do forgive you.” Waverly gave Nicole a quick kiss before turning around again. 

“Goodnight.” Waverly murmured. Nicole gave a menacing smirk. Both Earps down. The Widow was extremely proud. 

“Goodnight, Waverly.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this took so long... i didn't really know how to do this chapter. I think it turned out... okay I suppose.


	6. The Other Side of the Coin

The Widow left with Waverly in the morning, off to the BBD offices for work. The Earp had seemingly forgave her for the events of the night before, and it bewildered the Widow how willingly they were to shrug off her behaviour. The Widow waited until Waverly shut the Black Badge doors behind her before she left to meet Beth. 

“Deputy Haught?” Nedley asked, catching the woman off guard. She decided to make the lowest looking face she could muster. 

“Yes, Sheriff?” Nicole asked, turning and coughing as she did so. 

“You've missed half your shifts for nearly two days in a row, what's going on?” He asked, clearly a little miffed. 

“I really haven't been feeling great, Nedley. I thought I was okay to o, but I was wrong.” Nicole faked a sneeze and Nedley took off his hat solemnly. 

“I understand, but, call in sick next time, Deputy. You know better than to leave without a word.” Nicole nodded with a cough, before she and Nedley turned separate ways. As soon as Nicole exited the station, she stood tall and healthy as she walked to her cruiser.

“Why did I choose a host with so many vigilant connections.” The Widow complained from inside the cruiser. With a snap of her fingers, Nicole was back in her wedding gown. With another snap, Nicole vanished from the vehicle and appeared in the Gardner mansion. 

“Sister, how is everything turning out?” Nicole clapped her hands together happily as she entered the living room.

* * *

Waverly climbed up the stairs to Nicole's house, a container of still hot soup in her hands. She was worried about Nicole, the woman had seemed fine this morning. Waverly knocked.

“Nicole? Nedley said you weren't feeling well. I thought I'd bring you some soup.” Waverly opened the door a crack, curious as to what changed Nicole's strict lock three times policy. 

Waverly shut the door and saw Calamity Jane on the back of the couch. The fluffy orange feline meowed sadly. After Waverly pet the cat, she walked into the kitchen and placed the soup on the island. 

“Nicole?” Waverly called out. The young Earp headed towards the bedroom as the same tapping from yesterday began. Waverly looked back to see Calamity Jane had barely moved. “Nicole?” Waverly entered the bedroom and the tap became a weak “thud” once Waverly neared. She curiously walked to the closet, the sound getting a little louder as she did so. The young woman swallowed hard and swung open the closet door. 

Waverly let out a gasp when she jumped back. Shocked to see a woman without a face on the ground, next to wrinkled skin that must have been Mercedes'. 

“You really shouldn't have done that.” Nicole appeared in the corner behind Waverly, still wearing the gown that was a dead give away. Waverly looked between the Widow and who must have been Nicole in horror. 

“Nicole...” The woman stopped dropping to her hand to the ground as Waverly sad her name. 

“You bitch.” Waverly turned furiously, only for the Widow to hit her hard enough to knock her out of the room. Waverly recovered as quickly as she could, but the Widow came and tossed her into the wall next to the bedroom. 

“Nicole...” The Earp uttered weakly, as she tried to crawl to her girlfriend, her Nicole. The Widow came and gripped Waverly by the throat, pulling her up the wall. 

“It's going to be a shame, killing you. But you've left me with no choice, Earp.” The Widow threw Waverly towards the couch. “I hope you believe I'm sincere.” The Widow made her way to Waverly, but fell after one step. Despite not having a face, and being incredibly weak, Nicole had already made it to the bedroom doorway. She had grabbed the Widow's heel, causing her to fall. The woman in black got very angry, very fast. 

“Why...” The Widow stood and turned to Nicole angrily. “Won't you...” She raised her voice and opened her range “just DIE ALREADY!” The Widow shrieked, stomping on Nicole's mid-riff with all her force, earning a strong whimper from the meat sack. 

“Leave her alone!” Waverly threw one of Nicole's dining room chairs into the Widow, injuring her and breaking the chair, some debris landed on Nicole, making her cry even more. 

“I'm sorry, Baby.” Waverly rushed into the kitchen, and tore open the drawer where Nicole kept plastic wrap and aluminum foil. Waverly pulled out the gun and turned to see the Widow had vanished. She dropped the pistol to her side when she heard another whimper.

“Oh God, Nicole.” Waverly rushed to her girlfriend's side, unable to touch her to avoid more pain to the tender flesh. “Don't worry, I'm getting you to a hospital. I'm here, Baby, it's okay. I'm here.” Waverly comforted as she dialed 9-1-1. As the phone rang, Nicole reached out blindly for the girl in front of her. Waverly held Nicole's hand, glad to see that it still had skin and nails, and their ring. 

“I'm here, Baby, you're safe, we'll stop the Widow and get you back. You'll be okay.” Waverly comforted, brushing Nicole's knuckles with her thumb. Now Waverly wanted to kill the Widows even more.

* * *

Waverly watched Nicole get wheeled into the ER helplessly. Waverly was pacing when she got a phone call from Wynonna.

“Waverly, Nicole stole Peacemaker. Where is she?” Wynonna growled out, clearly driving by the background noise.

“It wasn't Nicole.” Waverly's voice broke and she started to cry, guilt seeping into her core.

“What the hell are you talking about?” Wynonna snapped out quickly. 

“The Widow... oh god, Wynonna. The Widow attacked Nicole.” Waverly choked out. “The doctors took her away. Wynonna, please.” Waverly collapsed into herself and Wynonna took a deep breath to calm her own anger. The Earp heir knew Mercedes had been taken to the hospital last night. She made a haste U-turn and started driving to the hospital instead of Haught's place. 

“I'll be there ASAP, Waverly. Just hang on.” Wynonna pleaded before hanging up. She drove down the highway without a clue of what to do. She knew Waverly needed her, and that Nicole and Mercedes were both important, but Peacemaker couldn't be in the hands of the Widows for long or else hell would break loose.

* * *

Wynonna rushed into the hospital, just for Waverly to run into her arms. Waverly sobbed as Wynonna stroke her hair gently.

“I'm so sorry Wynonna.” Waverly cried into her sister's shoulder desperately both were there for the women who the Widow attacked. Mercedes was found in the Gardner basement the night before, half dead. 

“We gave the seal to the Widows, for nothing.” Waverly cried. 

“How long do you think Nicole's been like this?” Wynonna asked quietly, and Waverly pulled away to cover her face with her hands. 

“God, I don't know! I don't know! She's been weird since... no... no.” Waverly pulled her knees to her chest sadly. “Since we got over our fight about the DNA results. I thought it was because I kissed Rosita. She said she needed to figure some stuff out.” 

“That's... a while...” Wynonna said, with Mercedes, she wasn't around as much, and there was definitely something up, but Wynonna caught on pretty quickly. How could they all have just let this woman off the hook so easily?

“I get it, I'm the worst girlfriend ever, I was with the Widow constantly and I didn't ask questions, I was stupid and selfish and Nicole's been in pain for days...” Waverly looked off towards the ER sadly. “And I didn't do anything to help her.” Wynonna placed a comforting hand on Waverly's shoulder. 

“You couldn't have known.” Wynonna lied sadly, she knew her sister needed to be comforted, even if what she was told were lies.

“That's the thing... I should've.” Waverly finished bluntly. The two sat in silence for the remainder of the wait. After what felt like hours, the doctor emerged. 

“You Earps are lucky I'm paid a lot to not ask questions.” He said as Waverly and Wynonna leaped from their seats. 

“How are they?” Wynonna asked quickly.

“We managed to... reattach Mercedes' skin, and for the saftey of our staff, we wish you don't ask questions about how. Sadly, we can't know if she has regained all her senses, but we should find out when she wakes up.” The doctor paused, allowing the Earp sisters to process. 

“And Nicole?” The Doctor flipped the sheet on his clipboard. 

“Nicole Haught is in very similar condition as Ms. Gardner was last night. She seems stronger, but in this condition, I'm not sure how long she can last. The fact she's on fluids now, and she's wrapped up to prevent infection, she'll be alright for the time being.” He explained.  
“If you can find her... face, sooner rather than later, that will probably give her a better chance.”

“Can I see her?” Waverly asked pleadingly. The doctor nodded.

“Yes, follow me. Wynonna, I believe you know where Ms. Gardner is.” The doctor lead Waverly to a room further down the hall. 

“Nicole...” Waverly breathed out as she sat next to the injured woman. She hesitantly took Nicole's hand in her own. She'd been sick twice since she got to the hospital, and since she faced the truth of what she'd done.

“Can you hear me?” Waverly asked slowly, she waited for a moment before Nicole squeezed her hand. Waverly let out a relieved huff. 

“I'm so sorry Nicole. I had no clue... I should have known.” Waverly was tearing up, and her voice shook sadly.

“I should've known... but I was too self absorbed and blind to realize. I never thought it could happen to you...”

Waverly laid her head on the side of the bed as she cried. Unexpectedly, Waverly felt someone stroke her hair, and it was Nicole. The fact that the beautiful and hurt woman was comforting Waverly made the Earp cry more. Waverly should have been there for Nicole. Should have been the one comforting her now.

But she wasn't.

And all Nicole cared about was that Waverly was there now. Waverly came. Waverly saved her. That was all Nicole cared about right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well... I wanted to wait a little longer before Waverly found out, but I also felt that this was finally time. Expect guilt and yelling in next chapter.
> 
> And please note that the next chapter may not come for a while because my head is reeling after the Hell that went down in Vegas and right now my heart is with the victims and their families.


	7. More Than What Meets the Eye

Nicole hadn't moved much in the last few minutes, but Waverly was vigilant, just in case and she didn't dare fall asleep. Every beep on the monitor made Waverly feel worse abut the situation. Her eyelids had started to betray her when a doctor walked in. 

“Ms. Earp, may we talk?” He asked as he motioned to the hall. Waverly grasped Nicole's hand slightly tighter as she reluctantly stood. She and the doctor left the room to discuss whatever it was that he needed to talk about. He cleared his throat before he began. “We wish to place Ms. Hau-”

“Nicole. Please, her name is Nicole.” He licked his lips and nodded calmly. 

“Of course. The staff and I have decided that Nicole should be placed under a medically induced coma. There isn't much we can do to protect her from exposure other than the cast, but we believe she'll be in less pain than she is now.” The doctor continued.

“Are you sure she'll be alright? It won't hurt her?” Waverly asked skeptically, she looked back to her girlfriend sadly. He sighed in response. 

“She won't be in more pain than she is now. Ms Gardner was lucky, your friends should hurry and find Ms. Hau- Nicole's soon. How she's alive now is a mystery to almost everyone here.” He took a moment to look off behind him, a nurse walked towards them. He turned back to Waverly and swallowed.

“I think you should be ready for anything that might happen, it is likely she won't make it.” Waverly took a shaky breath and nodded weakly. The nurse arrived and looked concerned for Waverly.

“Thank you. If you have to, do what's best...” Waverly answered simply before she walked back into her girlfriend's room. The young Earp gave the woman a sad gaze. The doctor gave a single glimpse into the room before he and the nurse began to wander down the hall.

“Why would you even think that!” The nurse hissed, before she hit him in the shoulder strongly. He looked at her in clear offense as he rubbed his arm in the area that his colleague had hit him. 

“What the hell was that, Janet!?” He growled at her. 

“Do you know what they would do to us if we let her die!? We might get our faces ripped off! They'll kill us and hang our bodies in the square as a warning.” She hissed out frantically. She briefly looked around the halls to make sure no one was able to hear. “We cannot let Nicole Haught die.” The nurse said flatly, glancing down towards the room where the woman in question laid. 

“We don't know if we can salvage her, the widows of Bulshar shouldn't have touched her. They should have known out of anyone in Purgatory not to harm the heir. I don't know if saving her will be as... easy as Ms. Gardner.” He responded. 

“Easy? Tell that to the dismembered body in the back dumpster.” Janet growled.

“We'll do what it takes, I just don't know if the same ritual will work.” He explained flatly, while he wrote something down. 

Janet was about to make a comment, when the elevator doors opened. The Earp heir walked out with a coffee in each hand. 

“As I was saying Ms. Flynn, I must get back to Ms. Haught to put her under. If you continue to be such a distraction I will have you removed from the hospital myself.” The doctor explained to the nurse coldly as Wynonna passed by the two staff members. She gave a double glance to them as she increased her pace. As soon as Wynonna entered Nicole's room, she spoke up.

“I heard a doctor outside talking about putting Nicole under. What was that about, Waves? Surgery or what?” Waverly lifted her head off of the hospital cot and looked at Nicole longingly. 

“A medical coma... to help her chances.” Waverly was barely audible. Wynonna placed Waverly's coffee down and rubbed her sister's back. I need to go back to Black Badge to talk to Dolls about Peacemaker. We'll track her down and we'll get Nicole back. I'll be here as soon as I can.” After she placed a kiss on Waverly's forehead the Earp heir left the room. Waverly gave a long sigh after her sister left.

“I swear sometimes all she cares about is that damn gun.” Waverly complained. “But she's right, she's going to hunt down that bitch and she'll save you. That's something I'll promise you.” Waverly took Nicole's hand in hers as the doctor walked in, a vile and a syringe in hand. He filled the syringe and injected it into the IV. Within moments, Nicole's cast covered head bobbed to the side.

“She won't be in as much pain now, if that's worth anything.” He squeezed Waverly's shoulder gently as she nodded. The doctor left the room and made his way towards Mercedes Gardner's room. 

“Dr. Lewis.” Janet exited the Gardner's room frantically. “You need to look at this.” Janet waved him over hurriedly. Mercedes had turned blue, and she was clearly deceased. 

“What the hell happened Janet, the sacrifice worked, there shouldn't have been any problems.” He growled out through gritted teeth as he hit the alert button. 

“It looks like suffocation to me.” Janet hissed at him, clearly disgusted by the scene in front of her. 

“Get in contact with the Bulshar cult, Janet, we need to ensure that this doesn't happen to the Haughts daughter.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your patience, I've been all over the place recently, and I'm sorry that it's such a short chapter. The next one will be longer, I promise.


	8. What Happens at Home

Waverly hadn't slept since she fund Nicole. She knew part of it was guilt, and the rest was fear that if she shut her eyes, Nicole would be gone. The youngest Earp knew she should have been helping everyone at Black Badge, but she couldn't bring herself to move away from Nicole's bedside. She whispered promises and apologies hand in hand as she prayed Nicole could hear her. 

Nicole dreamed. Nicole dreamed of her life with Waverly, what it should have been. When she wasn't dreaming of that, she was plagued by nightmares of her time in the closet, in pain without a way to get out, surrounded by darkness and sorrow. She was back in there, trapped and alone. Without hope. 

Nicole was trapped inside her own mind... and in her state, that was the worst place to be. 

* * *

Wynonna groaned weakly, exhausted and miserable. 

“We've been at this for days, and I should be with Waverly right now.” Wynonna complained. Doc and Dolls hesitated.

“We need to find Peacemaker, without it who knows how long we'll last.” Dolls said regretfully. He took a long and deep breath. “We'll look a little longer, just a little. Then you can go to the hospital again. We can all go.” Dolls encouraged. 

“Jeremy any luck on that tracer for the Widows?” Doc asked the scientist. Jeremy shot his head up away from his microscope. 

“I'm not sure, I mean, I'm close, but not quite, it's hard to explain, I have a few things I'm trying to do right now, I'll get it done, I promise, maybe, I'm rambling, I'll stop talking, Nicole's going to die isn't she? No, of course not, again, I'll stop talking, I can't stop talking, someone please make me stop talking.” Jeremy spoke hurriedly with a crack in his voice later on.

“Ms. Haught's going to be fine, Jeremy.” Doc encouraged. “And the sooner we find that Widow, the sooner she'll be alright.” Jeremy nodded quickly as he swallowed.

“I'll be quick.” Jeremy said shakily as he went back to his search. 

“See, Jeremy has this, and honestly I'm not in it right now, so if I can't do anything HERE, I'm going to go be with my sister, my Haughtdog, and my fun-bitch. Call me when there is something we can actually DO.” Wynonna waddled out of the BBD offices and out of the police station. 

“You heard the woman, let's get on this.” Dolls pulled out another book and started to flip through the pages. 

* * *

Wynonna entered the doors and went to visit Mercedes first, Nicole had Waverly and vise-versa, Mercedes was alone. The Earp heir got to the doorway just to see Mercedes' room was empty. She furrowed her brow as she backed away from the room in confusion. 

The doctor that was taking care of Mercedes and Nicole came into view and Wynonna noticed immediately. 

“Hey, you! Isn't this Mercedes Gardner's room?” The heir asked as she used her hands to point out the room number. The doctor sighed and licked his bottom lip.

“Ms. Gardner passed last night shortly after you left. There were post-surgery complications.” He explained heavily. Wynonna didn't believe him, Mercedes didn't suffer for so long just to give out in the end, after she was saved. Mercedes was too strong just to die without rhyme or reason. The woman struggled to process the information that was delivered. She subconsciously placed a had of her protruding belly as the doctor continued. “I know you two were close, and I'm sorry for your loss.” Wynonna nodded blankly. 

“Yeah, um... me too.” Wynonna muttered out briefly, still in shock. 

“Wynonna, I'm not sure if you'll find this to be any help but I know you must have been having a stressful last few days. Stress isn't good for the embryo, so take a moment to lay down and attempt to relax. Even if it isn't convenient.” The doctor encouraged. Wynonna glared at him with a fire in her eyes.

“My friend just died, and another friend of mine could end up dying the same way, and you want me to relax? Sorry, to both you and the kid, but I'll relax when my friends are safe.” Wynonna growled out, before she shoved the doctor aside and made her way down to Nicole's room. 

“Why are women hitting so much lately?” He grumbled out, while he looked down towards the Earp heir. “Friend... if only you knew, Wynonna Earp... if only you knew.” He walked in the opposite direction towards a different patient. 

Wynonna walked in to see that Waverly had drifted away, something her little sister needed right now. The older woman removed her large and fluffy coat and placed it over Waverly as a make-shift blanket. Wynonna sighed and took the chair on the other side of the bed. 

“Hey, Nicole. I don't really know what to say, or if you can even hear me, really.” Wynonna took a shaky breath before she managed to continue. “Everyone feels like shit, we knew something was wrong and we didn't do anything. She was so clearly different from you. You're so good it hurts, and the Widow bitch probably went against everything you stand for.” Wynonna let out a groan as she thought about the barn situation, wishing she had shot the imposter point blank. 

“I know it must hurt like hell, and God I know you'll be traumatized, but you won't be alone, Haught. No one is going to let you do this alone. So you can't check out, okay? Waverly loves you so much, we all do, all of us. And Waverly-”

“Didn't do anything about the psychotic bitch that stole her girlfriend's face.” Waverly piped up lamely from her side of the bed. 

“No one did anything, no one knew. We should have but we didn't.” Wynonna defended. 

“I did.” Waverly growled out in disgust. “I knew there was something so off about her after our fight. Like a true narcissist I brushed it off. I blamed it on her being upset about Rosita, her not being over the fight, her personal stuff.” Waverly spat out.

“I ignored every goddamn sign and every red flag, Wynonna. And there were a thousand and one.” Waverly's voice got shakier as she confessed her guilt.   
“I blamed it on Nicole, all of it, while she laid inside of her own closet in so much pain, inside the closet while-” Waverly gagged on the end of her own sentence, and tears started to flow slowly. 

“While what, Waverly?” Wynonna asked as she grabbed her chair to move it beside her sister's. 

“While I slept with the woman who I thought was her...” As much as that fact made Wynonna cringe, she knew that was out of character for her sister. Waverly hesitated to kiss her girlfriend if she thought there was a problem. So Wynonna knew there was more to the story. 

“Waverly... what did that bitch do to you?” Wynonna asked lowly as she reached for Peacemaker, just to remember the holster was empty. 

“It was so blissful, you two had gone for drinks, she seemed okay again, we went... there... and and she was pretty rough, I realized she really wasn't herself.” Waverly explained as briefly as possible. Wynonna took a deep breath to calm down, if she didn't want to kill that bitch before, she did now. 

“Look we're all guilty here. None of us thought it could happen to her.” Wynonna sighed. 

“But it did. I kept her out of Black Badge and she still wound up in the middle of the supernatural. I just wanted to protect her, to keep her safe.”

“Then you don't know Nicole that well.” A woman stood in the entry to Nicole's room and caught their attention. Waverly looked to see a beautiful woman in a red-orange dress. 

“Who the hell are you?” Waverly snapped weakly, still on edge. 

“Do either of you work here?” She asked in response, that earned a shake of the head from Wynonna. 

“I'm Shae, Nicole's... ''wife''.” Shay explained simply, it earned shocked expressions from both Earps. 

* * *

The Widows struggled when it came to breaking the third seal. They were both frustrated by this point.

“What was the point of stealing that stupid gun if we can't use it!?” Beth screeched at the other woman. 

“Oh, I don't know, so she can't use the stupid gun to kill our husband once he's released!” The Widow Nicole hissed in response. 

“Well he won't be released if we can't break this seal!” Beth yelled back.

“That's not my fault! Maybe if you picked up the slack once and a while.” Nicole snapped at Beth. The two rarely got along on a good day, and in these stressful times, they almost always screamed or yelled at the other. The two women were desperate and anxious. They just wanted their husband back at whatever cost it took. 

After they bickered some more, they felt something pull them from within. 

“Do you feel that?” Nicole asked immediately. Beth groaned and nodded. 

“I wish the keys to that seance was destroyed.” The Widow complained. “Let's go.” The two waved their hands and disappeared in a puff of smoke. 

The two Widows appeared in a dark grey cave. The Bulshar cult members were all wearing their dark red robes, all of them hooded aside from Ewan, who stood front and centre. Beside him was a shorter woman in a nurses outfit, someone clearly not a member of the cult. 

“What do you mortal fools want?” Beth hissed. “We have better things to do.”

“This has something to do with your newest choice of clothing. Well, not you so much as her.” Ewan motioned to Nicole. “You truly thought that taking an heir's skin was the smartest move.” Nicole scoffed mockingly, but two members from the side spoke up before the Widow had a chance. 

“Nicole Haught gave up her right to the Cult the minute she fled to Calgary.” A woman began, removing her hood to reveal an older lady with cinnamon coloured hair, and a tall man removed his hood and walked the two forward, his hair had once been the colour only matched to a flame, but now was an auburn alt and pepper colour. 

“You are the leader of this cult now Ewan Manuel Haught, you and you alone. Whether you like it or not.” the man ordered boldly. The Widows were amused by the confrontation. Ewan nodded in submission.

“Yes, I understand Nicolas, Carry...” Ewan replied lowly.

“As your mother said, Nicole gave up all rights the cult gave whence she left. It's time for you to move on.” Beth added calmly.

“Just consider it as me making good use of a disgrace.” Nicole said, faking a smile.

“We don't want the same thing that happened to Mercedes Gardner happening to Nicole.” The nurse spoke up. The Widow Nicole shrugged. 

“I didn't want loose ends, it's problematic, plus she was so whiny in the basement.” the woman defended. 

“Well Dr. Lewis wants you to make arrangements just in case.” Nicole rolled her eyes at the tiny nurse and motioned her and for her to continue. 

“The spell, if you die, Nicole's skin will peel away first. It will be left behind if you come to an end.” The Widow thought about this momentarily. 

“Before we do this, you must swear to find us Bobo Del Rey. He is the only one strong enough to break the seal and free Bulshar.” Beth demanded. Ewan nodded his promise.

“You're aware I' not dying anytime soon, correct?” The Widow asked mockingly. The nurse nodded frantically, clearly intimidated by the thing in front of her. Nicole turned to Beth and lifted her chin. “Sister, if you would.” Beth smiled and took her silver claw to the right crook of Nicole's neck. She pulled her nail upwards as she chanted quietly. Instead of the claw cutting the skin, it left a black line from the base of the neck to behind the ear before Beth used the same claw to cut down from the ear to the base of the neck on the Widow's left side. 

“Are you happy now?” Beth asked the nurse, who nodded again. “Good.” Beth stepped away and Nicole shot her claw from her glove into the nurse's neck. 

“That is for suggesting I'm weak and I will be defeated.” Nicole growled lowly as the nurse sputtered futilely for air. Ewan watched as the nurse fell to her knees and then fell face first into the ground. After the nurse dies, the Widows gave a wave of the hand and disappeared. They left the body spitting blood for the Bulshar cult to deal with, the humans were beneath them.

Ewan stared at the body before him emotionless, he knew that's what happened to people who angered the supernatural. Nicolas and Carry Haught walked up beside him.

“Don't let that become of you.” Nicolas flatly told Ewan, who balled his fists. The typically calm and collected man was angry with the two elders.

“You had nothing to say.” Ewan said through gritted teeth. “Nicole left when she was fifteen, a year before we were to be married, and that was eleven years ago.” Ewan elaborated. “And you have no comment on what she looks like now.” The Haughts both gave an exasperated sigh.

“That marriage doesn't matter anymore, Ewan. We gave you our name, we let you become our heir despite not having a tie to our family. Nicole left, she made her decision, she doesn't matter now, unless we make her return, Nicole is dead to this family.” Carry Haught explained heatedly. 

“You are usually more mature than this, you're usually smarter than that. Now I suggest you get back into old habits before this defiance becomes a pattern.” Nicolas threatened coldly. As the entire cult began to disperse. 

“You're right, I'm being ridiculous, idiotic. I'll stop.” Ewan promised them.

“Good. Now find Bobo Del Rey.” Carry answered before she took Nicolas' hand and marched off. 

* * *

“Wait... uhm, wife?” Wynonna asked Shae to repeat. Shae groaned. 

“Look, we're separated, we got drunk in Vegas, got hitched, went rock climbing in Nevada, and that was pretty much the end of the story.” Shae explained, as if it was read from a script.

“Then why are you here?” Waverly asked accusingly. Shae sighed. 

“The same reason we didn't get divorced, so her parents wouldn't be.” Waverly knew Nicole didn't talk to her parents, but she was confused as to why her parents wouldn't be called too.

“I'm a doctor, I've had to call in next of kin more than once, it goes spouse, biological or parental guardians, and then whoever else may be on the list.” Shae explained. “I'm only here so Nicole's wish is put through.”

“Which is?” Wynonna asked quickly, though Waverly already understood. The youngest Earp prayed that it wouldn't come to that, she couldn't imagine it coming to that.

“Her parents don't get final say.” 

As Wynonna absorbed this information, her phone gave a quiet ding. She looked to see the text and her face lit up. 

“Waverly, Jeremy did it, he found a way to trace them. I'll be back soon, I swear.” Wynonna wobbled out of the hospital room and down the hall. It left Waverly and Shae alone with the unconscious Nicole.


	9. If I Could Save You

“So the only reason you're here is because you think Nicole is going to die?” Waverly accused. 

“No, and I don't want to make that decision. Nicole and I, we had a fling, it wasn't real, we've both moved on and I'm just here to make sure her parents aren't.” Shae explained, she realized the woman in front of her might be jealous or confused. “She really loves you Waverly, I know that.” Waverly was surprised that Shae knew her name.

“But she might hate me now. She's like this because of me.” Waverly said guiltily. 

“What exactly is that? What happened to her?” Shae asked and Waverly shrugged.

“I have no clue. All I know is that when I found her, it was too late.” Waverly looked at her girlfriend regretfully. “Whatever happens now, I'm going to help her. I'll be there for her.” Waverly admitted, and Shae smiled.

“Good, people who make it through... things like this; are usually traumatized after. She'll need someone to be there for her while she recovers.” Shae explained as gently as possible. “I'm glad that it'll be you.” 

“Nothing is going to happen to her, never again.” Shae gave a sad huff.

“Danger follows that woman around like a magnet.” Shae admitted regretfully. Waverly nodded in acceptance.

* * *

Wynonna rode in the back alongside Jeremy while Dolls and Doc drove the SUV.

“So how do we know they'll still be there?” Wynonna asked.

“I second that statement.” Doc complained.

“We managed to get a hold of some of their venom,” Jeremy began. “It has radiation of... some kind in it, and we're tracking the trail.” Wynonna shook her head, too worried to wrap her head around it.

“Let's just help bring Nicole and Peacemaker back.” The Earp heir ordered.

“Loud and clear,” Dolls spoke up, before driving significantly faster. They all wanted to help Nicole, she was one of their own.

“They've moved!” Jeremy suddenly yelled. “Just up the road, then turn to the right.” Jeremy told Dolls. 

“There's no turn up ahead.” Doc noted before Dolls huffed out a laugh. 

“Then I'll make one.” Dolls answered as he threw the wheel to the side rapidly. It caused the car to jerk to the side into the terrain and surprised everyone in the vehicle other than Dolls himself. 

“Dolls if you kill us before we get to the Widows this entire trip is worth nothing!” Wynonna yelled out. 

“Excuse the obvious, but how do we even know that they will have your awesome magic gun with them?” Jeremy asked. Dolls slammed on the break in realization, and Jeremy shrank in on himself even more as Doc sighed. Wynonna simply looked forward and placed a hand on her baby bump.

“Hope.” She answered and that was a good enough answer for Jeremy to sit up straight in understanding and for Dolls to start driving again. Doc gave a wholesome nod before he looked ahead.

“Just a little farther.” Jeremy briefed Dolls as he slowed down Jeremy spoke again. “Stop. They'll see us.” Jeremy warned, and the SUV came to a complete stop. 

“Let's go get a ginger back.” Dolls told the team. 

“And not die in the process?” Jeremy asked hopefully. Doc patted the young man's shoulder as he held up a revolver.

“Not us, just them.” Doc suggested. The four of them climbed out of the car armed and ready to go. 

“Remember open fire, just try not to hit Nicole's showing skin.” Dolls explained as they prepared to go in. 

“Yeah, just get me to Peacemaker and I'll shoot everywhere that the sun doesn't shine on that bitch.” Wynonna loaded the shotgun she was carrying instead of her preferred weapon. 

They all climbed the hill, Dolls with Jeremy on one side and Wynonna and Doc on the other. Wynonna was the first into position, and she was the first to see it, to see him.

“Holy shit...” Wynonna gasped. “Bobo.” 

“What in tarnation.” Doc was baffled as he saw the scene in front of him. Bobo Del-Rey was alive and with the Widows. 

“Guys new plan.” Dolls came in over the talkies. “Try to get them all immobilized, grab Peacemaker, eliminate Bobo, get back to Purgatory. Understood?” Wynonna took the radio from Jeremy, both scared and furious. 

“Dolls, how the hell-” Wynonna asked in shock. 

“I have no clue, let's just make sure he isn't around for long.” Dolls told the heir in an attempt to keep her calm.

In the dip beneath the hill, the two Widows were arguing as Bobo watched bemusedly. 

“We need to work together to free my husband!” Beth shrieked.

“MY HUSBAND. And I'm trying to work with you, you're the one who's being ridiculous!” 

“Ladies, ladies, you're both pretty.” Bobo mocked. 

“I'm MARRIED.” The Widows yelled at the Revenant together. Bobo held out his hands in surrender, the tassels of his straitjacket dangling down carelessly. 

“Alright, alright. Now, instead of tearing me and then each other in two, just give me this seal you need broken.” Bobo distracted the Widows from their hate as much as he was able.

“Dolls...” Wynonna growled into the radio.

“Just wait. We need an opening. We don't have your gun right now, Earp. So we need to be careful.” Wynonna waited for an opening as long as she could, but patience was not the Earp's strong suit, nor was it Doc's. 

“Screw waitin'. That son of a bitch is why I was trapped in a well for so many years.” Doc aimed his revolver, ready to shoot, but Wynonna forced his arm down. “What?” He hissed quietly.

“At least wait until we see Peacemaker.” Wynonna pleaded, she missed that damn gun and knew that unless they had it, Bobo would still come back. Doc nodded in a silent agreement and returned his eyes to the scene. Beth had pulled out his ring and was handing it to Bobo when Jeremy's foot slipped on the grass. The scientist's gasp of “oh shit” caused Bobo to turn his head in Dolls' direction, but otherwise he ignored the sound that came and left.

“Just break the seal!” Nicole demanded. Bobo growled and nipped his teeth at her in response, but did as told.

“Not only is Bobo back, but that bitch... I bet she killed Mercedes and she's sporting Nicole's skin. It's disgusting. I want 'em all to burn in hell.” Wynonna growled. Doc placed his fee hand on her shoulder and squeezed gently. 

“We all do, Wynonna.” He told her quietly. Doc watched as Bobo finally crushed the object that gave him his immortality and couldn't stop his breath from catching. He didn't feel any different, aside from the dread that came alongside the knowledge of his mortality.

“I scratch your back. You scratch mine. I want that gun. And I'd rather it be now then later.” Nicole growled but gave a partially accepting sigh. She pulled out peacemaker out from some sort of fold in her dress. that Wynonna didn't even want to think about.

Before Wynonna could think about it, Doc aimed again and opened fire on Bobo. He fired bullet after bullet as he tried to get the Revenant down. Due to the pressure Doc put on by firing at Bobo, Dolls began to fire at Nicole, and Wynonna for Beth. All three of them started moving in closer, trying to trap them in any way. After Doc hit Bobo in the jaw, the Revenant fell to his knees, just for Dolls to land in the shot between his eyes that made Bobo drop Peacemaker and fall to the ground, out for the count for the time being. Nicole and Beth both disappeared into two puffs of smoke, along with Bobo's form disappearing with them.

“No!” Wynonna yelled, looking around futilely for the Revenant and the Widows. “They can't... NO!” Wynonna looked around more, desperate to see them. Doc and Dolls both rushed to her side. 

“Wynonna, it's too late now, we got Peacemaker back, that's what's important. Now we can figure out a real plan to defeat them and get Nicole back.” Dolls told her. Doc also jumped in.

“And this running around isn't good for you or the baby.” Doc got Wynonna to stop circling frantically and Jeremy brought her Peacemaker. Wynonna tried to breathe.

“Thanks Jeremy.” Wynonna muttered while she clenched onto Peacemaker with her life. “I missed you, you asshole.” She mumbled before quickly placing a kiss on the cold metal of the gun, quickly making a disgusted face after she remembered where it had been while she had lost possession of it.

“Look we should go back to The station, try to figure something out, you should rest. And someone should update Waverly, shouldn't they?” Jeremy suggested sheepishly. 

“Fine. But once we figure out where Bulshar is buried, we kill them all.” Wynonna walked up the hill, and then down, with some assistance. They made it back to the truck, just to see a fire engine a short ways away from the BBD SUV. As they got closer, they saw Ewan standing in front of the SUV, in his raspberry red cloak, hood off, metal box in hand. The metal box that contained the precious “weapon” that Waverly lost her hand for. Well, short term.

“What do you want Ewan?” Dolls asked angrily, Wynonna stayed in place, but readied Peacemaker.

“To help you. I can't guarantee the same for the future, but for now, this will help.” he walked forward a few steps and placed the box on the ground. 

“Why would you do this? Aren't you part of Bulshar's cult. You should be on their side.” Jeremy pointed out shakily.

“I am. Let's just say you and I have a mutual interest we'd both like to preserve.” Ewan walked to his truck, climbed in and drove off without another word, leaving the four he left there bewildered.

“Common interest? What the hell would that be?” Doc asked grimly as Wynonna went and picked up the metal case. 

“No clue.” Dolls answered. 

“What are we supposed to do with it?” Jeremy asked, motioning to the plate Wynonna had just taken out of the case and was now playing with it.

“I think I know. I'm just not positive how to do it.” Wynonna mumbled to herself. “Jeremy, this is metal right? Not ceramic?” She asked handing the plastic-looking plate to the scientist. After a brief examination and he tapped it with a pen ac couple times, he gave a nod.

“Definitely metal, but I don't think whoever made it wants that to be known.” He piped up, excitedly swinging the plate. After a glare from Wynonna he bared his teeth in embarrassment and handed the plate back while he went red in the face. Sorry.” 

“Wynonna?” Dolls asked, feigning concern. “Care to share?” He continued, Wynonna tapped the plate against her hand.

“Nah... let's go back to Purgatory.” Wynonna put the plate back into it's case and everyone climbed into the SUV.

* * *  
The Earp heir walked into the Hospital, on her way to get Waverly, she kind of hoped Nicole's other woman wasn't there. Before it occurred to the Earp that Waverly was the other woman. Wynonna knew Nicole loved Waverly, it was so damn obvious. Even the way Nicole looked at Waverly was only compared to that of the heart-eyes emoji. Wynonna scolded herself on not realizing it sooner. 

“Waverly?” Wynonna walked it to see her sister at Nicole's bedside clenching her girlfriend's hand tightly. “Waves?” She asked again after Waverly didn't reply. “Waverly.” Wynonna said, a little louder as she placed her hand on her sister's shoulder. Waverly's head snapped up to meet Wynonna's face. The elder sibling immediately noticed how red Waverly's eyes were, and how... sunken she looked, like she had lost muscle and aged sixteen years without the wrinkles. Guilt really did age someone, even if they shouldn't feel guilty.   
“Hey...” Wynonna said gently.

“What happened? Did you get Nicole's face back? Did you kill the bitch?” Waverly asked desperately, a feral hope entering her eyes until Wynonna shook her head remorsefully.

“No, but I do have an idea, it'll work. I was wondering if you wanted to help me do it, or if you wanted to stay here.” Waverly looked back to the cast that surrounded Nicole's tender flesh, before she looked back to Wynonna.

“Come back before you put a bullet in her heart. I just think I should be with Nicole until then.” Wynonna nodded and left the room, she saw Shae in the middle of the hall, she had two water cups in hand. 

“Hi, did everything work out?” She asked. 

“Not quiet, but it will. It has to.” Wynonna replied. “Where'd you run off to?”

“Water,” She stated, lifting the cups up for affect. “Can't believe I had to go all the way to the kitchen, it's ridiculous.” Wynonna lifted her eyebrows in sad surprise.

“I'll second that. Hospitals suck in general, this this especially.” Wynonna agreed, before she pointed to the door. “Lucky I gotta get out of here.” 

“Talk about it. Well, I've kept both you and Waverly waiting long enough. Good luck, Wynonna.” Shae finished before the two women went their separate ways and Wynonna drove off to the Blacksmith's hut. She cautiously walked up to the front door. She entered the hut before remembering she had no clue how to make a bullet. He only knew how to shoot them.

Wynonna looked at the fire, and the realization hit her that there was a fire burning, after the Blacksmith died months ago. She grabbed Peacemaker and spun around, her aim landed on a woman who looked identical to the Blacksmith. Her twin sister, the iron witch. 

“Wynonna Earp...” She grumbled hatefully. “Maddie is dead because of you and your sister.” She pointed out agitatedly.

“She wanted to protect Waverly. She wanted Constance to lose, her husband, Bulshar will rise soon, and his other wives will thrive too. We need your help, everyone does.” Wynonna explained, she hoped it was enough to convince Greta to help her. 

“What do I get in return?” The witch asked quickly. 

“Well, the same as everyone, you'll live. If I can't kill Bulshar and his Widows, we're all dead.”

“And you think you can do it?” Greta scoffed unfaithfully. 

“Not without your help.” Wynonna pushed.

“And with my help?” The witch asked. 

“Eighty-four percent, no... sixty, no... seventy-eight percent positive.” The Earp heir stated. Greta shook her head in disbelief as she looked at Wynonna like she was an idiot.

“Good God we're all going to die.” The witch mumbled before she walked up to Wynonna and took the plate from her. “What do you want me to do?” 

“Help me melt that down and turn it into a bullet for Peacemaker.” Greta walked to a chest and shortly after, threw a pair of gloves at Wynonna.

“Let's get to work.” The two women began.

* * *

Waverly didn't react when Shae returned from the washroom, honestly, the younger woman had barely noticed her absence. 

“Waverly, you don't have to watch her every second. You can eat, sleep, blink, anything. Just take a minute and focus on yourself. She'll still be here.” Shae tried to get Waverly out of her head, she knew what happened to people in Waverly's situation if they internalized themselves. 

“Stop... talking...” Waverly grumbled out sharply. 

“I'm sorry, I just-”

“I did focus on myself, for a week, and week before that, I've been so self-centred. And she got hurt, she was in her bedroom on the floor. She was half dead, and I was too late to help her. Because, for once, I was focusing on myself, not her, not Wynonna or work or all the shit. I was dealing with my crap and my problems. When I did that, Nicole got hurt.” Waverly cut Shae off, before she continued the rampage that she'd bottled up.

“Waverly, you can't-” 

“That's all anyone is saying, ''Waverly, you can't blame yourself,'' ''Waverly, you couldn't have known.'' ''Waverly no one thought this could happen.'' Everyone sounds the same, and it's all a lie. Someone should have checked, or noticed, I should have noticed.” Waverly teared up almost instantly, still angry, but the pain also seeped into her tone.

Nicole was so amazing, so kind, she was incredible, yet she was so alone. She lived on the quietest street in Purgatory, the only people who would typically visit were either Waverly or Nedley, more so the prior than the latter. Nicole kept to herself at work and only just recently started to really build a friendship with Wynonna and the others. Especially since Nicole had been declared Wynonna's designated drinker. Well... when Nicole was Nicole...  
“You know what? Yeah, you could have been a little more vigilant, you all could have. God forbid, even I could have checked up on her. But it's too late for that now. Now, you can sit here and rot away, or you can go get something to eat and know that's what she would want you to do now.” 

“But what if-”

“I'm doctor, if anything goes wrong I'll call for her doctor and try to help her myself. She'll be alright if you leave for ten minutes.” Waverly thought about everything that could go wrong in ten minutes, a hundred and one scenarios ran through her head, and she found the horrible images made it easier for her to sink further into the chair and to hold Nicole's hand a little tighter. 

“I won't leave her side until you get back. I'll be here the whole time. Go get a sandwich or something from the cafeteria, now.” Waverly almost had enough nerve to tell Shae to get the sandwich herself, but the look and tone that came from the other woman made Waverly sluggishly leave Nicole's side. Waverly felt a pit grow in her stomach when she left the room, and her pace quickly got faster so she could get back to Nicole sooner. 

Shae watched over Nicole as she promised, she knew that Nicole wouldn't stop until Waverly ate of she were in the condition to do so.

“I was looking at the papers.” Shae started, not even sure if Nicole would hear her. “Everything looks good to go, we'll be able to have a quiet divorce, and Waverly is set up to be your next of kin. You and I can finally go our separate ways, Nic. You can be with Waverly and Jess and I can finally get hitched. We'll both be happy.” Shae paused and sadly smiled to the woman on the bed in front of her. “And your parents won't be involved at all. Not one bit, not a call, a signature, nothing.”

“I wouldn't be too sure of that now, missy.” Shae jumped out of the chair and spun around to face Nicole in a black, Victorian style wedding gown with a dark smile on her face.

“Nicole? I thou- wh-” before Shae had the chance to recover from the shock, the Widow fired her paralyzing fog the poor woman's way. Shae fell to the ground, frozen both literally and in horror. She watched helplessly as Nicole stepped over her and ripped the woman on the bed away from the IV's and tubes. Not a moment after, Nicole and the woman covered in the cast, whoever it was, were gone in a puff of smoke.

Waverly nibbled on the sandwich despite that she didn't have the biggest appetite. She entered Nicole's hospital room, to see the bed empty and Shae on the ground as the woman tried to move. Waverly's sandwich dropped from her hand to the ground as her eyes widened in terror. 

“No, no no, Nicole. Nicole!” Waverly looked over the bed to see if Nicole had just fallen, but the only woman on the ground was Shae. “No, no no no no no. Nicole. No...” Waverly whimpered as she backed into the wall closest to the door. She had been right, Nicole got hurt again, and it was her fault. 

* * *

Greta pulled out a single bullet from the forge and Wynonna gaped in shock.

“That- that's it!? I need more, there should be more, that plate was huge.”

“This is what you get. Most of the plate was ceramic, this was produced from the metal, the part you wanted.” Greta threw the now cold bullet for the Earp heir to catch.

Wynonna admired the jade coloured bullet that took far too long to make, especially considering their hard work only produced a single bullet from the plate that probably should have made at least four. 

“Is that all you want, Earp?” Greta asked coldly. Wynonna nodded quickly. 

“Thank you, Greta.”

“So you do know my name, goody for you. Now get out.” The woman threw her gloves back into the chest as Wynonna wobbled out of the house. Wynonna felt a weird pain from her stomach, something she knew was a contraction and groaned unhappily.   
“Not now... not now you ass hole.” The Earp heir finished wobbling to the truck before she struggled to get in.

Greta watched as Wynonna drove away before she looked at the five two bullets in her hand. 

* * *

“Where is he!?” Beth shrieked in a panic.

“In the mountain, buried.” Bobo finally announced. 

“Why would our husband be in the mountain!?” Nicole snapped.

“I had to dig for Constance's sons remains, he got in the way. We moved him.” Bobo drawled out, before he lead them towards the miner's entrance. After they ventured deep into the mountain, they reached an opening, and Bulshar's coffin was in a perfectly carved out piece of the cave wall. Like a drawer in a desk.

Why has he not broken free yet?” Nicole asked.

“Maybe, he just doesn't have motivation yet.” Beth pushed her sister aside and stood in front of the giant box, arms outstretched. “My love, it's me! Your lovely wife and humble servant. The one you've been waiting for.” Nothing changed in the atmosphere at her declaration.

“How dare you!” Nicole screeched at Beth. She moved forward and pushed Beth to the ground. “It is I, the one who yearns for your touch the most! My lord, my love, come to me once again!” Nicole cheered, a smile on her face until she received the same results as Beth.

“Why won't he come out!?” Nicole yelled in her upset rage. Beth began to pick herself up off the ground.

“Of course he wouldn't come for you!” Bobo held back a laugh as he watched the women bicker. “You are weak, you were unfaithful! You betrayed him, unlike I, who would never risk losing his love!” Beth directed the end to the box in the wall. 

“I was unfaithful to get you Wyatt Earp's gun! And to hurt his descendants!” Nicole directed to the wall as well.

“You're both pathetic.” Bobo piped up finally, before he walked up closer. “Uh, Bulshar, right? The world is ready to be conquered by you and your mighty wrath! Your Revenant's are ready to have their leader take control!” At the word of “conquered” one of Bulshar's large and mutated arms tore through the once impenetrable box.

Beth screamed with childish joy. Nicole clapped excitedly. 

“My husband is rising, and I will be here to meet him with a warm embrace once he is free!” Beth cheered proudly

“MY husband!” Nicole corrected loudly.

“You're too weak to be considered his wife! You NEVER deserved him!” Beth screamed in an octave no human being should be forced to hear.

“and YOU DID?!?!?!” Nicole screamed back, it made Bobo wince. 

“May the best sister win! The last one living is his last wife!” Beth demanded. Nicole disappeared in a puff of smoke. Beth turned to the arm that writhed from the wall. “I'll return soon, my love, I swear it.” before she disappeared as well.

“Well, big guy, looks like it's just you and your number two.” Bobo implied slyly.

Nicole stood outside the mountain entrance in thought. “Now I need my weapon,” Nicole grumbled, “AND bait.” And the Widow was gone with a second poof. 

* * *

Waverly sprinted out of the hospital with everything she had, she screamed Wynonna's name with a heartbreaking tone when she saw her truck race into the parking lot. Wynonna only saw Waverly once her sister sprinted out in front of the truck. Wynonna slammed on the break and was a mere foot from crushing Waverly.

“Are you nuts!?” Wynonna yelled as she rolled down her window while Waverly ran to her side of the car.

“Nicole's gone!” Waverly stated frantically. 

“Gone? Gone where?” Wynonna asked in confusion.

“I think a Widow took her, or something, we just, we need to get her back!” Waverly begged desperately.

“Okay, okay, calm down, get in.” Waverly climbed into the truck and the two started to drive towards the Black Badge offices.

“We'll get Doc and Dolls, we'll make a plan or something, and then we'll get Nicole back, kill the Widows, or Bulshar, all three hopefully.” Wynonna winced as she felt another contraction. “By the way, the ass hole is on it's way.” Waverly snapped her head to Wynonna, she stared at Wynonna in the eye then down to her baby bump.

“Oh dear god.” Waverly muttered, she knew that they had even more pressure to do this now.

The two drove into town, they ignored the speed limit until the came to the centre of town, where they saw people laying on the ground ahead.

“What the hell?” Wynonna asked. Waverly winced before she got a good look. 

“Oh my god, it's Nicole.” Waverly jumped out of the truck and ran forward. Standing in front of Nicole, Jeremy and probably half of Purgatory, was the faux Nicole.

“Waverly!” Wynonna yelled, but it was too late, Beth appeared from behind and grabbed Waverly, claw to her neck.

“Shoot my sister or Purgatory dies.” Nicole called out.

“If you shoot me, your precious Waverly comes with me. Or you can shoot HER and save your sister.” Beth taunted as she waved her claw around Waverly's pulse point.

“Stop with the dramatics!” Nicole yelled out at Beth. “Wynonna Earp, give me the weapon and kill the wench over there and I will set the town free.”

“Your plate was a tacky piece of shit, so I melted it down into a honking bullet for Peacemaker right here.” Nicole let out a amused laugh. The bitch made Wynonna and Waverly furious by still hiding behind the face and voice she stole. Someone cleared their throat from behind the scene and walked up.

“Sorry I'm late, I didn't get an invitation.” Doc spoke out. Nicole shook her head in irritation before she continued.

“You don't realize it yet, how pitiful. I don't want that useless gun I want you, Wynonna Earp, the Earp heir and the weapon that will free my husband from his slumber. Use the bullet on Beth and we will stand alongside Bulshar together.” Nicole negotiated. Waverly and Wynonna resisted the urge to cringe at “Nicole”s words.

“If you think that's negotiation, you're damn bad at it! You're still wearing my friend's face, you took two of 'em actually!” Wynonna shouted out.

“Use the bullet on Nicole or I'll kill your sister.” Beth taunted again, and she pulled Waverly closer to her. 

“She wants to feed your child to my husband.” Nicole called out. “Help me or I will let her.”

“Don't you dare threaten my child!” Doc spoke out, he made his way around and pulled his gun on Wynonna. “If any harm were to come of it, I'd rather do the honours myself then let the wenches of the devil do it instead.” Waverly's eyes grew and Wynonna feigned a thoughtful look as she walked out away from the truck to face Doc.

“Wynonna, what the hell is he doing!?” Waverly asked, she tried to pull away but Beth pulled her back in.

“I bet it's nice.” Doc started. “I know Wyatt's looking down on you, and he must be so damn proud.”

“If I'm dead they both loose.” Wynonna thought aloud.   
“Two birds.” Doc pointed out. 

“It's a rouse!” Beth shouted.

“The baby's coming, you can save it. Aim high. I'll try to take one of them out on my way down, too.”

“Or me. I'm so very tired, Wynonna.”

“Doc! 'Nonna! No! I can't lose both of you too!” Waverly pleaded desperately as she shot terrified looks at both people.

“So much for a rouse!” Nicole cheered while Doc and Wynonna aimed for each other's head. “I'm almost embarrassed for all of you!”

“No no no.” Waverly whimpered weakly as the two gunslingers fired their weapons. The bullets collided and before anyone could understand what was happening, Wynonna's bullet spilt and hit both Widows point blank, it shocked Waverly and caused her to jump. Doc's bullet soared over Wynonna's shoulder and hit the wall behind her. 

The Widows turned to rock and crumbled instantaneously. Waverly yanked herself away from where Beth had held her and stared at where the Widow Nicole had stood. Waverly ran to where her sister and Doc stood and hugged. She joined the group hug and slapped Doc as soon as the embrace ended.  
“Never! Ever do that again!”   
Waverly backed away and looked at he dust that remained of the Widow that stole Nicole.   
The Widow died and brought Nicole's face to hell with her. 

“No...” Waverly took a shaky breath and resisted the tears as most of the Widow's victims regained the ability to move while Nicole laid still. The youngest Earp walked sluggishly and weakly to her Nicole's side. After what felt like eons to Waverly, she collapsed on her knees next to the woman she tried so hard to save. “I'm so sorry...” Waverly whimpered out brokenly. She lifted Nicole's limp body up from the cement and clenched her close to her chest. The cast was inconvenient, but it was there. Waverly cried into the neck of the cast as she mumbled apologies everyone else had thought. 

Doc, Wynonna and Jeremy all sadly watched at the sight before them. They all sadly mourned and watched Waverly weep for the woman she loved. The woman she loves.   
“I failed you,” Waverly sobbed. “I failed you and I'm so sorry... I tried... I tried so hard... and I'm so so-rry.” 

“Come back, I love you.”

Waverly felt a hand brush upwards on her back. And shook her head in denial. “Please, just let me be alone...” Waverly begged Wynonna. 

“Baby girl.” Wynonna said, still at Doc's side. Waverly looked over to see Nicole struggling to lift up her hand to her head. 

“Nic-Nicole.” Waverly muttered out in shock, and finally heard the mumbles and whimpers from under the cast. 

“ouhhhh, ouhhhh.” Nicole muttered. Waverly's eyes lit up with hope.

“Wynonna! I need a knife! Anyone!?” Waverly pleaded. Jeremy walked up and handed her a scalpel. 

“Would that work?” He asked. Waverly didn't answer, but instead began to gently saw at the cast until she was able to take it off carefully. She nearly sobbed with joy and shock to see a frightened Nicole. Her face, not flesh, Nicole. 

“Oh my god!” Waverly cried out before she hugged her girlfriend tightly. Once Waverly pulled away, Nicole stared past Waverly ad felt her girlfriend's face to tell. Nicole could hardly whimper. 

“Something's still wrong, we need to go to the hospital!” Waverly called to them, as she tried to lift Nicole up.

“Make that two something's, this sucker is coming out my vagina quick!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry the update took so long, I haven't had a lot of time to write or edit (Warning chapter is unedited)
> 
> I do feel bad because I feel like the quality is wearing down with each chapter. Hopefully this is enjoyable, and hopefully the next chapter is up sooner rather than later


	10. Eye of the Stor- Oh Goddamn it.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So... Nicole's got her face back! Obstacle 1 down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one was written entirely on mobile so sorry for spelling errors.

The entire trip to the hospital, Nicole wheezed, squeaked, or whimpered, despite Waverly's attempts to comfort her. Nicole didn't even look at Waverly, instead her eyes frantically searched for anything, but never found it.

“Breathe Wynonna!” Doc urged. 

“I AM breathing, you pop-tart!” Wynonna snapped at him.

“What the hell is a pop tart!?” Doc snipped back in confusion. 

“I don't think she can see. I-I think she's blind.” Waverly spoke up finally, forcing herself to accept reality after what had happened the last time she tuned a blind eye. The guilt Waverly would feel for the events that took place would haunt her forever, and she knew it. 

“We'll help her, Waverly. She's going to be okay, we aren't losing her again.” Wynonna stated as she tried to calm her breathing, she was as gentle as she could be in her current state. Despite how agitated the older Earp was at the moment, she spoke warmly to Waverly. 

After what felt like a hundred years to Wynonna and Waverly, they made it to the hospital. Waverly pulled Nicole out of the car gently, and Jeremy- who had been riding in the cargo bed- got out to help. Doc lead Wynonna into the emergency room, and Jeremy and Waverly both put one of Nicole's arms around their shoulders so they could carry her in.

“Help us!” Waverly yelled as she wobbled in, her adrenaline leaving her. The doctor—Lewis, maybe?- who had tended to Nicole before hand walked out of another room in shock. Nicole's face had been returned, that meant the Widows were dead. And the Earp baby was coming. 

“Get her a wheelchair! And get that one a stretcher!” He ordered two nurses, before turning another one who worked in the maternity ward away from the group.

“Once the Earp baby is delivered, kill the doctor after he stitches up Wynonna. Bring the baby to the Bulshar cult as quickly as possible. Notify Ewan of Nicole's safety. Tell him I will personally taking care of her, she will receive all of my attention until she is well.” The nurse nodded before going to take Wynonna's wheelchair to a room. The doctor came over to where Nicole was on the stretcher. 

“She's blind,” Waverly stammered out. “And deaf maybe, I-I don't know.” The doctor gave Nicole a quick examination, before turning his attention to Waverly and Jeremy. 

“If you two don't mind waiting here, I'm going to take her in to do a few examinations, try to see what the problem is.” He said softly, before he and two nurses wheeled Nicole away. Jeremy held onto Waverly's shoulder with one hand and her arm with his other, trying to support her without being too awkward. He tredded lightly, because he knew how fragile she was right now. He also knew that fragile wasn't the right word, she was shaken, so much had happened so quickly to the two people she cared most about, anyone would be worried if they were in Waverly's shoes.

“Wy-Wynonna we-we need to be there for Wynonna...” Waverly muttered weakly, disassociating from the situation before she could let herself be more worried.

“You go to Wynonna, I'll call Dolls and meet you in her room.” Jeremy said, he slowly let go of Waverly as she pulled away from him. She managed to walk to the doorway before she collapsed to her knees. Jeremy made it quickly to her side and he coaxed her back up gently. She was in shock, he knew that much but he didn't know that Waverly had imagined everything that could go wrong— for both Wynonna and Nicole- in a second alone.

Wynonna could have issues delivering, or the baby might not make it, and that would break Wynonna and Doc, Wynonna could hemorrhage. Childbirth was a beautiful yet terrifying concept. Then Nicole, oh poor Nicole,poor, innocent Nicole, she could be blind or deaf forever, maybe both, after what had already happened, Nicole would be miserable with that life. She could still die, Waverly didn't know how Nicole had her face back, or even if it was really Nicole. The worst part for Waverly was that she knew it could and probably would happen again. Nicole wasn't safe as long as Waverly was a part of her life.

After Waverly had managed to stand on her own and breathe, she realized she was being irrational, Jeremy went to call Dolls and Waverly made her way to Wynonna's room, careful not to lose herself again, if she let those thoughts take over again, she'd never be able to get back up.

* * *

Nicole hadn't stopped whimpering nor whining, and since she had been taken from Waverly, it had just gotten worse. The doctor stood around the operation table alongside five nurses, all of the nurses chanted quietly in Latin, while Dr. Lewis' voice boomed in the room. He raised a blade in the air over Nicole as he spoke.

“Let the body be whole, allow her the eyes of a hawk, the ears of a mutt, the voice of a bear, the hands of a fox. Let her senses be returned, and accept the sacrifice we offer!” He shouted, before swinging the knife into the throat of the nurse to his left. He pulled the blade and blood squirted freely as he held the wound over Nicole's face. Soon enough, some of the blood landed in Nicole's mouth, it caused the red head to choke and gurgle, she coughed out the metallic liquid with an inhuman roar to accompany it. During the moment, her eyes had shifted to a bold red colour. After a few moments of her gasping, after her eyes returned to their natural state, Nicole passed out.

“You've just... you-” one nurse stammered out, in shock after the ritual. “You've turned her into a monster.” 

“I did what I had to do to save her. In the process I saved all of us too, because if we allowed Nicole to stay in her previous state, the Bulshar cult would have ripped out our tongues. Maybe skin us alive.” Dr. Lewis explained gravely. “No one speaks of this, now get her comfortable in a room.” He removed the unused stethoscope and placed it on the table before he left the operation room.

“Ms. Earp.” Dr. Lewis said as he stood in the doorway to Wynonna's room. Waverly turned her head from her deeply breathing sister to the doctor. “I thought you'd all care to know that Ms. Haught will make a full recovery, she just needs some much deserved rest and time.” Waverly gave a sigh of relief, and thanked the doctor. 

“When can I see her?” The youngest Earp asked eagerly. 

“Jut stay with your sister for now, we're keeping Nicole asleep right now, so she can heal. She's in the same room as before, so whenever you like.” Waverly nodded and the doctor left the room. 

“What- did... I tell... you?” Wynonna asked, she used her measured breathing to punctuate each word. Everyone was glad that Nicole was finally safe, and they all were able to put their focus on Wynonna. 

“Dolls wasn't answering, but I finally got a hold of him.” Jeremy said proudly as he entered the room. “He'll be here as soon as he can.”

Wynonna was comforted by the fact that Dolls would be there to help Doc protect the baby after she gave birth. She hoped that the baby wouldn't need protecting, but it would, she knew that it would. They all did. A different doctor walked in, a smile on her face. 

“Hi, Wynonna, we're going to induce labor shortly, I'm Dr. Weiss and I'll be helping you deliver.” She took a moment to acknowledge the group of support Wynonna had at her side.

“Unfortunately there's no room in the delivery room for a bystander however, you can all wait in here or in the waiting room until the baby is born, we'll bring in the father first.” Doc smiled proudly. “And rest assured that I'll have a very skilled and attentive nurse assisting me.”

“Yea, 'kay, very nice and very sweet lady, blah blah blah, but please, let's just get this thing outta me!” Wynonna begged, her face contorted as she had another contraction. The doctor obliged with a nod. 

"Sorry about her, she's grumpy." Waverly said to the doctor so Wynonna couldn't hear

“Okay, can someone help me get her into a wheelchair?” Dr. Weiss asked innocently. 

“I can get in myself.” Wynonna spoke lowly, ready to rip someone's head off, it would likely end up being the doctor's. Dr Weiss brought in the wheelchair and, with some difficulty, Wynonna got in. Waverly followed Wynonna and the doctor into the hall.

“I love you, see you and baby Earp soon.” Waverly kissed Wynonna's forehead before her older sister was wheeled away, and Waverly made her way down to Nicole's room. She would have liked to think that she was keeping her cool, however she basically sprinted into her girlfriend's room. She didn't think it was true, she found it difficult to picture Nicole's face, unharmed.

Waverly came to a dead halt outside the door. She was scared she'd walk in, just to see Nicole's head covered in a cast again. Much like how she had a sliver of hope that every time she would walk inside, that the woman in the cot would be healed. She never was. So why should Waverly think that that had changed?

Because she saw it for herself, Nicole was in one piece, a couple cracks, but she was safe.

Waverly entered the room and looked at Nicole with a mix of adoration, guilt, love and sorrow. 

“I'm so sorry, Nicole.” Waverly walked to the woman resting peacefully in the cot, an IV in her arm. “I love you Baby.” She placed a kiss on Nicole's forehead before taking a seat next to her.

“You've been gone a while, Wynonna's having her baby. And We stopped Clootie... Bulshar, for now. You just wake up, safe and sound. Just be okay. Please. I need you to be okay. You've had too many close calls.” Waverly took a shaky breath before she continued. “Just come back, can you do that.” Waverly recalled the last thing Shae said to her. 

_“Nicole is incredible... but she doesn't see it. She almost tolerates the worst human being more than she loves herself. She had it rough, I don't even know how bad it was. I just know she wasn't accepted, so she worked her ass off to get out and to gain respect. Just, remember that, Waverly. Everything she does for you, is out of love. No more, no less.”_

Waverly wished she had known that before she kissed Rosita, before she screamed at Nicole, Before she sent that awful message, before she allowed the Widow's behavior to slip by. Before everything. 

After a few minutes where the only noise was Nicole's heart monitor beeping away, Waverly noticed the previously steady rhythm increase. “Nicole?” Waverly whispered hopefully. Nicole managed to mumble in her sleep just a moment later. “Nicole.” Waverly stroked the woman's red hair and whispered reassurances.

Finally, Nicole's eyes fluttered open. Waverly noticed an immediate difference from when she removed the cast on the street. Nicole groaned and winced at the sudden light, before she looked around and held her eyes on Waverly. The woman in the cot smiled weakly. 

“Waves...” Nicole rasped out. 

“Nicole,” Waverly felt the weight of the world leave her shoulders as she placed a gentle kiss to her girlfriend's lips. “I missed you so much.” 

“How... what happened? How am I back?” Nicole weakly reached for Waverly's hand, and the other girl met her half way, giving a reassuring squeeze.

“Honestly, I don't know. I'm just glad you are.” Waverly solemnly replied. She turned and pressed the call button.

“Are you okay?” Nicole asked. The young Earp held back a laugh.

“Am I okay? Baby, you just went through hell, and you're asking if I'm okay?” Waverly was shocked, and the question made her feel horrible. 

“Are you?”

“I am now. You're here, Wynonna's having Baby Earp, the Widows are long gone, and everyone is alive.” Waverly kissed Nicole's forehead.

“Wait... Wynonna's in labor? How long was I-” Nicole's sentence was interrupted by two gunshots from down the hall, near the entrance. “What was that?”

“I have no idea” Waverly went to lock the door, but Nicole stopped her.

“No!” Nicole ordered as strongly as she could manage. “Go check on them, on Wynonna and the baby, now!”

“I can't leave you, what is they come this way?” Waverly argued protectively.

“Either you go make sure they're okay, or I will.” Nicole enforced the threat by pushing herself up on her elbow.

“No more dying.” Waverly ordered.

“No more dying, now go.” Nicole promised, and Waverly ran out the door down to the maternity ward.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Funny story, I lost a decent internet connection, and I've been busy with work, life and school, so sorry for such an erratic updating schedule. Hope the wait was worth it (?)


	11. Away.

Wynonna wasn't ecstatic to push a watermelon out of her vagina. And doing it sober? That was an even worse thought. 

“You ready to have a baby Wynonna?” Dr. Weiss asked kindly. 

“Cut the act, Jenny, don't pretend that you weren't just like everyone else in high school.” Wynonna sat up and got in position.

“In my defence, it was before I realized how crazy this little town really was. I should tell you some horror stories from this place sometime.” Wynonna smirked painfully in the process.

“I guarantee you I got worse.” Dr. Weiss put on her gloves and shook her head, even smiled in amusement for a moment.

“Yeah, I bet you do. We should share over coffee sometime.” Dr. Weiss put on her gloves before she positioned herself to help Wynonna. “But right now, you gotta push.” 

Wynonna wasn't fond of the idea of birth before, but the process made her hate the idea even more. There were yells, gasps, moans, and curse upon curse. Wynonna wished more than life that she could've had a drink. She vaguely remembered Dr. Weiss yelling at her to push like the badass she was.  
Eventually, there was an odd relief after the constant pressure. Then there was crying. Dr. Weiss wrapped up the baby happily, proud of the new life that had just came into the world. She sent one of the nurses away to get Doc.

“Wynonna Earp, would you like to meet your baby girl?” Dr. Weiss handed Wynonna the crying new born, a look of adoration in her eyes. Wynonna, originally, had been terrified to even look at the child she knew she would let down. But as soon as she cautiously took the baby—her baby— in her arms, she felt the warmest she had ever been. Wynonna didn't even know how the overwhelming sensation to protect and nurture the crying child. 

“Damn. Look at you.” Wynonna marvelled. She was instantaneously proud of the little one she pushed out of her. “You just came out of my vagina,” Wynonna spoke as if informing herself more than telling the newborn. 

“You're the best thing I ever did.” Wynonna whispered to the little girl as one of her tiny hand clutched Wynonna's pointer finger.

“I'm going to make sure Henry is on his way.” Dr. Weiss said warmly. One nurse followed Dr. Weiss with a scalpel in hand and another one moved closer to Wynonna. 

The nurse with the scalpel pulled Dr. Weiss' hair back and slit her throat before Wynonna finished yelling her warning “Jenny!” The nurse that had moved towards Wynonna slapped a laryngeal mask on the new mother, earning flailing with Wynonna's legs and the arm that wasn't supporting the child that cried even more now that her mother was in distress even if the baby wasn't capable to register the sense of danger yet. 

“YOU SON OF A BITCH! GET... Get off meee...” Wynonna yelled muffledly before she succumbed to the drug and her baby was taken from her grasp by the nurse. 

“How cute,” The nurse that killed Dr. Weiss stated. “To the Bulshar cult, immediately.” The nurse holding the Earp child ran out of the room and rushed through the halls. 

“Is that my baby?” Doc called out after her as he stepped out of the stairwell. She turned and threw a scalpel at his head, he turned quickly enough so the scalpel only grazed his cheek. He pulled out his gun to shoot her but he feared that the fall would most definitely hurt the newborn. She made a run fr it after she saw his hesitation.

Doc and cardio were never great friends but he did his damn best to catch the nurse. Despite her best efforts to push washing tubs in front of him

They were nearly in the waiting room when the nurse looked back to see if Doc was still closing in. And in the moment it took her to turn and for Doc to get closer, a shot rang out, and the nurse dropped, sending the baby flying from her arms and into Doc's. 

“What the hell did I miss!?” Dolls yelled in horror with wide eyes. Doc walked up to the dying nurse on the floor and ignored Dolls' question.

“Didn't anyone ever teach you not to shake a baby?” He asked in a fury before stomping in her skull. 

“Guys? Guys!” Waverly ran down the hallway. “Oh my god! What the hell happened?” Waverly looked at baby Earp and how Doc was cradling it. “Where's Wynonna?” Waverly immediately turned and ran into Wynonna's maternity room. A nurse was holding a pillow over Wynonna's unmoving figure. “Wynonna!” Waverly rushed to the bag with Peacemaker in it. Despite Waverly's concerns about not being an Earp she grabbed it, and was relieved when it didn't burn to touch it. 

She tried firing unsuccessfully but the demon turned from Wynonna, removing the pillow as she tried to get to Waverly. “Come on, come on, comeoncomeon.” Waverly panicked as the nurse neared quickly. After the nurse backed her into a corner, Peacemaker finally glowed a bold orange and Waverly successfully shot the nurse. Waverly dropped the gun and raced to Wynonna's side to find her breathing. Waverly tried to wake her sister up but only gained a mumble from her older sister.   
“Wynonna,” Waverly coaxed as Dolls and Doc came in. “Wynonna, Wyn...” Waverly took a minute before straight up yelling “Wynonna, we're out of booze!” while shaking the recently pregnant woman. Wynonna shot up forward in a haze.

“Then BUY SOME!” Wynonna looked around the room sleepily. “What's going on?” Wynonna asked. 

“The nurses tried to take the baby. And kill you.” Waverly said. Doc brought the fussing newborn over to Wynonna. 

“This is ours.” Wynonna said proudly, and it made Waverly's heart melt. Dolls came up beside Waverly and looked at the smaller girl with worry. 

“How's Nicole?” Dolls asked. Everyone in the room looked up to see her response. It made Waverly smile to see that everyone cared so much about Nicole's well being. 

“She's awake, she's hurting but she can talk, and see and she can hear too. She's going to be okay.” Waverly answered happily. 

“You know it baby girl.” Wynonna said happily before looking down at the baby in her arms. “I love you.” Wynonna kissed the baby's forehead before letting Doc say a similar goodbye. Wynonna held out the baby for Waverly to hold. And Waverly held the baby like it was one of the most precious things in the world. Waverly smiled proudly at the fact that she was an aunt. Auntie Waverly and Auntie Nicole. It was a blissful thought. Waverly booped the sleeping baby's nose before handing it to Dolls. “Take Alice to Perry. Now. Keep her safe.” Wynonna begged Dolls. He nodded and left the room. Doc looked in a happy yet sad shock at Wynonna as tears fell down the eldest Earps face. “What?!” Waverly asked in hurt surprise, Wynonna was taking her daughter away from Purgatory?

“Why?” Waverly asked, in pain. Nicole hadn't even met the little one yet.

“She'll always be in danger here. I'm going to keep her safe until Bulshar, the cult, and every Revenant in Purgatory is dead.” Wynonna said, her voice weak. “Then we'll bring her home. Gus too.” Wynonna said sternly.

Waverly nodded. “You two probably want to be alone.”   
“Go check on Haughtstuff, Waverly. But before you do... I wanted Nicole to take Alice out of town, not Dolls.” Waverly smiled sadly and realized how much Wynonna and Nicole really did care about each other and that Wynonna trusted Nicole. `It also explained why Nicole was shocked and panicked slightly when she found out Wynonna was giving birth.

“Nicole? Are you okay?” Waverly asked when she entered her girlfriend's room. Nicole looked up at Waverly.

“Is everyone okay? Did someone take Wynonna's baby?” Nicole's voice still wasn't one-hundred percent yet, and Waverly figure by the way Nicole squinted slightly, her sight wasn't all there either. She wondered if her hearing wasn't great yet either. Waverly nodded in response to the question. 

“Alice. She named her Alice.” Nicole sadly smiled. Waverly wondered what was behind the smile, the thoughts. She also wondered when everything that happened was going to really hit Nicole. 

“It's a nice name. Alice Earp. I guess I screwed this one up a little, huh?” Nicole let out a weak laugh that sounded choked. 

“No. No, Nicole you didn't do anything wrong. The Widow hurt you, you had no control over what happened. Just focus on getting better.” Waverly brought a glass of water from the nightstand up to Nicole's lips. She took a small drink before pulling away and Waverly set it back down on the table. 

“When can I get out of here?” Nicole muttered, not enjoying the fact that she was in such a weak and dependant state.   
“Can you touch my cheek?” Waverly asked. Nicole tried, but her muscles betrayed her after just removing her arm from the blankets. Nicole groaned in disappointment, just for Waverly to reward her with a kiss for trying. “When you can touch my cheek, then we'll see.” 

“I just think there's so much to talk about, and I don't want to do that while I'm in a hospital bed.” Nicole explained and Waverly nodded.   
“I know, Baby. And we will talk, when you're safe and sound. No lies, everything on the table.” Waverly and Nicole agreed. 

“I think Wynonna will need you tonight, more than I will, okay?” Waverly nodded. 

“I don't want to leave you.” Nicole looked at Waverly with a warmth that should've been difficult to have in her state. 

“I'm not going to get possessed by a demon or get my face ripped off again. I'll be okay. Wynonna might not be. She's tough, but she just said goodbye to her kid, she'll need all the support she can get.” 

Waverly stayed with Nicole until visiting hours were over and she went to Wynonna's room to comfort her sister. 

* * *

Nicole had no trouble sleeping that night, except for the nightmares of The Widow attacking her plaguing her each time she closed her eyes. Nicole managed to fall asleep after hours of being scared to shut her eyes. Just to be awoken by the creak of the door to her room opening. 

“Waverly?” Nicole asked, only now she wasn't in her cot anymore, she was back at the bottom of the closet, in pain, dying of exposure, and The Widows towering over her, kicking and hitting her with every movement she made, only this time The Widow bearing Nicole's face had Waverly on her arm, and cheered the Widow on, just to kiss her after Nicole's beating. 

Nicole truly awoke and shot up out of bed, despite the fact she didn't actually have the strength to do so. Nicole fell back onto the cot, weak and tired and sweating profusely. She took a sweep of the room, the door was shut, so were the windows, she was alone. 

“Hello Nicole.” It was Ewan who spoke from the darkest corner of the room. He walked up net to her cot and sat next to her, after he turned on the lamp. “It's been a long time. I bet I look better now than I did the last time we saw each other.” He said while looking at Nicole darkly. “When was that? Eleven years? Twelve? A year before our marriage.”

“Why the hell are you here, Ewan?” Nicole asked the man beside her.

“I heard my rightful wife had been hurt, I wanted to make sure she was okay. Alive.” Ewan looked at her. 

“I'm not your wife, I left that life a long time ago.” Nicole wish her gun was with her, and that she could have shot Ewan right there. Another Bulshar member dead wasn't a bad thing in the slightest. 

“Your parents have given up on you, they didn't until they realized that hunting you down was futile. I have not.” Ewan leaned closer, he placed his hand on Nicole's cheek and wrapped his thumb around her chin with a vice grip so she couldn't pull away and so she had to look at him. “You have to ask yourslelf then, if you're really done with the Bulshar cult, with your parents, with me, then why did you return to Purgatory in the first place?” He let go of Nicole and she pulled back as much as her recovering body would allow. 

“I came to fight against everything the Bulshar cult is. The monsters, the demons, all of it.” Nicole responded, venom in her voice. Her blood boiled the longer she looked at him. 

“You're being beat by the looks of it.” Ewan came in close, his breath against her ear. “Emily didn't die in the apartment fire, I plunged the knife in her chest, felt the life drain from her. Then Nicolas and Carrie both burned it down to the ground.” Nicole clenched her teeth at the reopened wound. At the memory of her walking home from picking up the Chinese, to see the apartment building collapsing in on itself as smoke bellowed out from each opening, all the residents there except the one she cared about. Everyone except Emily. The day after their first time together. Ewan wrapped his hand around Nicole, she knew it was a scare tactic but that didn't make the pain or the choking sensation any better. “I bet the feeling would be just as orgasmic if I did the same to Waverly.” He whispered hoarsely into her ear. 

“You son of a bitch!” Nicole growled as fiercely as she could, but the state she was in made it difficult for her to sound threatening. Ewan tightened his grip on her throat. 

“And the fact that someone could be watching her sleep right now, by Wynonna's side, waiting for my command to take them both out, knowing you wouldn't be able to stop it. That kills you Nicole, the thought is enough, but if that was the case right now, you'd die.” He growled into her ear.

“Y-you wouldn't...” Nicole choked out weakly, glaring at him as she spoke

“Oh? What makes you so sure?” Ewan asked in slight amusement.

“Because if you did, there would be no way in hell I'd ever come back, and that's what you want. You want me back. You want Nicole Haught, heir to the Bulshar “throne” next to your side. Because without me, you'll never truly be taken seriously as their leader. Not completely.” Nicole used every ounce of strength she had to spit in his face.   
“You're right, Nikki. And one way or another, you will. You will see the error of your ways, and you will come back to me.” Ewan told her as he stood up. “Even if I have to kill half of Purgatory to force you to. Only, unlike Emily, I'll plunge the knife into Waverly's heart while you watch.” Ewan's mistake was turning his back on the hospitalized woman. Nicole's eyes were replaced with the burning red that had shone through in the operating room. Nicole launched herself from the bad with newfound strength and rammed Ewan into the wall forcefully. She turned his body so he was facing her when she put her hand around his throat. Not to scare, to kill.

“If you touch the Earps I will tear you into more pieces than the human brain can even comprehend. Your body will be ash and your soul will burn as I eat your heart. EVER threaten the Earps again and YOU will be the one with a knife in his chest!” Nicole's voice wasn't her own, it was dark, demonic. Evil. And Ewan smiled in surprise and glory, even after Nicole smashed his head into the wall, which left a decent sized hole.

“You're-they... already. Remarkable. It'll take less convincing than I thought.” He placed his middle and pointer fingers on on Nicole's temple and the red faded from her eyes, and the strength left her, she collapsed in Ewan's arms, and for the first time that night, sleep came easily to the recovering red head. 

* * *

“Oh my God, Nicole!?” Waverly came in to see a hole in Nicole's hospital room wall, and the woman in the cot with red bruises on her throat, as if she had been strangled. “Nicole! Baby, baby, wake up!” Waverly rushed to Nicole's side quickly. Waverly shook Nicole until the taller woman woke up. 

“What the hell, Waverly!” Nicole groaned weakly. 

“What the hell me? What the hell happened here!? Were you attacked?” Nicole winced in confusion, before Waverly threw her arms towards the wall. “There's a whole in the wall the size of a big watermelon, and you have bruises on your neck. Are you okay, what happened?” Nicole continued to look confused, it was the only way to play it off without telling Waverly the truth. The truth, the thing Waverly deserved the most of all and the thing Nicole couldn't give her. 

“I don't know about the hole,” Which was the truth, she had absolutely no clue how that hole in the wall had gotten there, and it wasn't there when Ewan was there, then again, Nicole didn't remember Ewan leaving either.  
“But maybe the bruises are from when the Widow took over my body. All the injuries her body healed might just be showing up now?” Nicole suggested weakly, her voice even raspier than it was last night. 

“If that's the case than a bullet wound could show up any minute!” Waverly panicked, lifting up Nicole's hospital gown to check for any other injuries in a panic. 

“Hey, hey...” Nicole summoned everything she had to grab Waverly's hand and place it over Nicole's heart. “I'm okay, I'm safe now, and I'm okay.” 

“But what if you start bleeding internally, what if you are already!?” Waverly panicked and Nicole felt awful for causing Waverly unnecessary concern.

“I'm in a hospital, the doctor's will fix it. Waves, I'm alright. I'm going to be alright.” Waverly felt guilty as the injured woman comforted her. It should have been the other way around. Waverly kissed Nicole gently, worried that her girlfriend was still fragile.

“How's Wynonna?” Nicole asked.

“She's hurting, she wants out. Both were expected.” Waverly explained. “She even mentioned wanting to check in on you to make a Haught pun or forty.” Nicole gave Waverly a smile at that one. 

“I can't blame her, I want out too.” Nicole told Waverly. “Like, how are we supposed to cuddle on this puny excuse for a bed?”

“I bet you we could figure it out.” Waverly told Nicole, the young Earp said as she took the challenge. “Even though you can barely move on your own.” Nicole hissed at that, feigning pain. Waverly pulled Nicole closer to her edge of the bed before walking around the cot to the other side so she could cradle Nicole as the big spoon. “See? Not so hard.” The two laughed at Waverly's comment before returning to the sweet silence of the room. The feeling of holding each other and breathing in everything Nicole was a feeling Waverly missed much more than she originally thought. They laid there like that, going in and out of sleep and silence whenever they felt like it, for the majority of the day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kind of forgot to write for a while there... oops? Hope it was worth the wait. In all honesty I kind of know where this story is going but at the same time I really, really don't. So updating will continue to be erratic.


	12. Trauma

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nicole and Waverly talk. Nicole's not as okay as she wants to believe. More backstory for Nicole and Waverly as well

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It gets dark. PTSD, thoughts of suicide, discussion of past emotional and psychological abuse, past dubious consent. If there are any more trigger warnings I should include, please let me know.

“Wynonna, want something to eat?” Waverly asked briefly after the woman dragged herself out of her room and into the kitchen for a beer. Wynonna popped the cap and shook her head.

“No time, Baby-girl. Gotta get to Black Badge.” Wynonna had been drowning in herself ever since she came back from the hospital. Nothing but a beer in the morning, straight to Black Badge to keep herself busy, if she wasn't there she was drinking at Shorty's. When she came home at night often after Waverly, she'd either lay on the ground and stare at the blank TV or she'd cry, and Waverly would be by her side either way. Then in the morning Wynonna acted as if it never happened. The only exception was the first day back home, Wynonna got on her motorcycle and disappeared the whole day, only to come home and say that she left town to go to a bar. 

Waverly felt guilty not being able to help Wynonna in the couple weeks she'd been home. The fact that Nicole was being released soon didn't help the situation, Waverly knew she and Nicole had to talk, and being home wouldn't be easy for her girlfriend, and she didn't know who to help, who to try to help. And the youngest Earp knew damn well that Wynonna's drinking alone would soon turn into Wynonna and Nicole drowning in their sorrows together. The tiny woman doubted that would be a good thing. 

“Wynonna you should eat. Something, anything.” Her older sister rolled her eyes and opened the cupboard, just to grab a tiny soup pack of two saltine crackers and ate them. 

“There, I ate something, see you at BBD this afternoon, Waves.” Wynonna kissed the top of Waverly's head before leaving the house. 

* * * 

When Waverly got to the hospital, she walked in on Nicole trying to do push ups. The red head's arms wobbled and she barely managed to do two before her arms gave out. Waverly came over and helped Nicole sit on the cot before taking a seat next to her girlfriend. 

“I'm getting stronger...” Nicole heaved, she was noticeably sweating. It made Waverly both happy and sad at the same time, Nicole had used to be able to do countless push-ups while Waverly laid on her back, but it also meant she was recovering, and that was good.

“Yeah, you are. You'll be back in the game in no time, Baby.” Nicole smiled and leaned in to kiss Waverly, the younger girl kissed back. When Waverly thought about it, she knew what Nicole meant when she said that Waverly had tasted different when she was possessed by Mikshun. When She kissed the Widow, it tasted like rotten fruit or gasoline, and the Widow was forceful. Nicole tasted like vanilla and coffee even though she probably hadn't had anything that tasted like either and Nicole was so gentle. If it was a desperate kiss, or passionate, Waverly didn't know how she'd react after the night with the Widow. Something she was going to have to tell Nicole about when they finally sat down and talked. That talk was not something Waverly was looking forward to having. 

Waverly pulled away from the kiss with the guilt of the fact that she kissed the Widow... and Rosita. Another thing Waverly didn't want to talk about but had to. She looked up and down Nicole, she was still pale, but less so than she was originally, frail, Nicole had a lot of muscle tone to build back up, but the bags under her eyes were more prominent each time Waverly saw her girlfriend. 

“Did you manage to sleep last night, sweetie?” Waverly asked as she cupped Nicole's cheek with her hand and rubbed Nicole's under eye gently with her thumb. The taller woman shook her head in reply. At least Ewan hadn't came and revisited her again.

“We're going to talk about what happened right? Everything? When I get out?” Waverly smiled sadly with a nod.

“Yeah everything. And I'm going to be saying “I'm sorry” a lot, just to let you know.” Waverly told Nicole kindly. 

“I'm probably going to cry a lot.” Nicole replied truthfully. Waverly sighed in acceptance.

“You and me both.” Waverly agreed, and Nicole wanted to change the subject. 

“How's Wynonna doing?” Wynonna, another secret Nicole was keeping from Waverly, her conversation with Wynonna the day the eldest Earp was released. Another thing Nicole wasn't and couldn't tell Waverly. 

Waverly explained that Wynonna was still messed up, and Nicole wished she could drink as much as Wynonna was probably drinking that minute.

“Speaking of Wynonna and Black Badge, I have to get to work.” Waverly told her girlfriend sadly. 

“Okay, thanks for coming by,” Nicole kissed Waverly's cheek. “See you later.” Later that afternoon, while Waverly was at Black Badge, Dr. Lewis came in to examine Nicole. He made her punch his hand, he checked her vitals, made her walk around the room. 

“Okay, Nicole, by the looks of it you've improved greatly since your last check up. I think, if you want, you could leave tonight or tomorrow morning. You just have to sign a few papers.” Nicole smiled. 

“I could leave? Now?” Dr. Lewis nodded. Nicole took a shaky yet happy sigh. “Give me the papers, thank you so much.”

“You still have to take it easy and I don't recommend returning to work until you've had the go ahead by a doctor or a supervisor.” Nicole nodded quickly. 

“Yeah,, yeah sure, just let me out of here.” Nicole grabbed his clipboard as soon as he handed it to her and signed where it was required to release her. “Thank you.” 

“Would you like to call anyone to pick you up?” Nicole nodded and Dr. Lewis handed her his cellphone. Nicole dialed the first five digits of Waverly's number before realizing being released meant they had to talk and she was already preoccupied with Wynonna and Black Badge stuff. She deleted the numbers and dialed Nedley's number. 

“Hello?” He answered after only a few rings. 

“Hey, Nedley, it's Nicole. I'm sorry to bother you but I heard you had Calamity Jane, and I've been released, could you bring her back to my place when you have a minute?” 

“Is someone picking you up?” He asked. Nicole told him she was going to take a cab home instead of bothering someone. 

“Don't be ridiculous, I'll pick up Calamity Jane and then I'll come to get you, give me ten or fifteen minutes.” He answered. He was closest thing to a father she had ever had, considering her real father was a royal jack-ass. 

“Thank you Nedley.” She gave Dr. Lewis' cell back to him before he left so she could get dressed. She needed ten of those fifteen minutes just to get dressed, and she broke into a sweat half way through clasping her bra. She made a promise to herself that she was burning the shirt and the jeans once she got home, they reminded her too much of the attack. When Nicole finally bought a cup of coffee and began to drink it in the waiting room, Nedley pulled up outside, he came in to help her with her bags, but she didn't have anything to carry except a book Waverly had been reading to her and the coffee cup she just bought.

“I know that cat's going to be excited to see her mamma.” Nedley said as he gave Nicole a hug. “I'm glad to see you're alright, Haught.” Nicole smiled when they pulled away from the hug, she was grateful, that he looked like a teddy bear and hugged like one too. Not too tight. 

“You do realize she'd yours in my will, right?” Nedley huffed.

“You take ten years off my life each time you remind me.” He mumbled, even though he smiled after she couldn't see it. They walked to the cruiser and Calamity Jane laid quietly in the open cat carrier until Nicole entered the back seat of the cruiser. The cat sniffed her had only a couple times before leaping onto Nicole's lap and purred profusely. 

“Hey, C.J. Look at you.” Nicole smiled and pet the cat gently. The ride was relatively quiet and Nicole felt a pit in her stomach grow as they pulled up to her house. 

“You going to be alright or would you like me to come in with you?” He asked her as he parked. 

“I think I'll be alright. Thank you so much Nedley.” He smiled and tipped his hat as he helped her out. Calamity Jane took her seat in the carrier and Nicole struggled to carry the cat to the door with two hands. She set the carrier down on the porch and waved goodbye to Nedley as he pulled out of the drive way. 

Nicole opened the door and was suddenly standing behind the Widow Mercedes, she watched as the Widow pushed down another Nicole and froze her. Nicole stood frozen in the door way as the Widow snapped the red head's neck before peeling away the skin and shedding the skin she had previously bore. The Widow, now posing as Nicole turned and stared at the Nicole in the doorway. 

“Do I scare you?” She asked with Nicole's voice. Before she was an inch away from the healing woman's face. “I should.” Nicole was snapped out of the daydream by Calamity Jane sprinting into the house. Nicole examined it as she shut the door and walked inside. There was blood near the foyer, where her head had connected with the floor. There were holes in the wall and a broken chair near Nicole's bedroom door. 

Her bedroom...

Nicole swallowed hard, she was being irrational, stupid for no reason. The Widows were dead. Both of them. Bulshar was still trapped. Everything was okay. No matter how many times she thought this to herself, the lump in her throat grew more and more the closer she walked to the bedroom. She stepped over the rubble that was left from the holes in the wall and the shattered chair. Nicole entered the room slowly, and her lungs got tight. She couldn't take a solid breath or focus her mind. She took a few steps towards her bed before she heard a tap from the closet. Nicole turned to see herself, faceless, weak, dying on the ground in her closet. She couldn't fight the yelp that followed as she stumbled backwards and hit her head on the nightstand as she fell to the ground. 

Nicole stared at the closet as her breathing became unsteady as she began to hyperventilate. “It's not real, I'm right here, not there, I'm safe, I'm here. Not in there.” Despite being able to find words she couldn't calm her breathing. She brought herself to her feet as quickly as she could, before going and shutting the closet doors and getting out of her room. She made it to her kitchen sink before she puked. 

“What's happening to me?” Nicole asked herself as she slid down to the ground as tears started to fall down her cheeks. She took a few shaky breaths before she pulled her knees up to her chest and placed her head in between them. Calamity Jane sensed Nicole's distress and curled up beside her. And that's when it hit Nicole, Calamity Jane was probably the only one who noticed that it wasn't her, that something—everything—was wrong, and it made Nicole sob harder, head in her knees as she hugged them close. Because she really was more alone than she let herself believe.

She sat like that for hours, before she washed the vomit out of the sink and she shut her bedroom door. Not being able to see that part of the house helped a lot. It was getting dark so Nicole turned on the kitchen light and the living room lamp so she could clean up the rubble. She moved slow, taking it easy like she was told to, soon she had two garbage bags full and put them on the porch. Nicole opened her fridge just to smell the scent of something—or a lot of things—rotten. She started a third garbage bag and emptied almost everything from her fridge into the bag, by the time she threw out everything that had gone bad, all that remained were a few condiments, a half empty jar of strawberry jam, and a six pack of beer that only had two left, even that was stale. She pulled out one of the bottles anyways and popped the cap before taking a seat at her kitchen island. Nicole took a look at her phone and called Waverly. The conversation had been put off long enough, so it should be tomorrow. It rang for a while before Waverly answered.

“Nicole?” The young Earp asked, slightly confused.

“Hey, Waves. I just thought I should call. I got released from the hospital this afternoon. I'm at home now.” 

“This afternoon? Nicole it's ten o'clock, why didn't you ask me to pick you up?” Waverly asked, not able to decide whether she was shocked or hurt. 

“Nedley offered, and I needed to be alone for a while anyways. I had some cleaning to do.” Nicole explained and Waverly silently scolded herself for not going back sooner and cleaning up the house for her girlfriend instead of allowing the injured woman to push herself.

“So I guess we have stuff to talk about tomorrow. I'll come over after breakfast?” Nicole agreed, and just after, she heard a sob through the phone followed by a glass shattering. “Wynonna needs me, I gotta go. Love you.” 

“I-I love you too... bye.” Nicole hung up in shock. That wasn't the first I love you she imagined hearing from Waverly. Nicole had repeated it over and over on the messages she had left for Waverly. After their fight... Nicole had assumed Waverly made up with Nicole while the Widow was in her place. Because what she remembered from before was her being possessive and hiding the DNA results, and them in an argument, Nicole being worried about Waverly and leaving messages on her phone, then getting the text from Waverly that broke Nicole's heart. It killed Nicole to think that she screwed up the one good thing she had found in this world. Then she remembered opening the door, wishing—praying—for Waverly to be there on the other side, just to see Mercedes instead. The last memory made Nicole down the rest of the stale beer. And the thought that Waverly eventually did come, to be greeted by the Widow posing as Nicole, pushed Nicole to opening and chugging the last one. After the second beer was gone, she opened her cupboard to get the strong shit, which she drank from the bottle. After Nicole took another swig, she grabbed her pistol from her drawer and took another drink before bringing it to the coffee table next to the couch. She left about a quarter of the contents in the bottle and set it beside the gun.

After refilling C.J.'s food dish, Nicole walked to the linen closet, took out a blanket and took her spot on the couch, soon followed by a sleepy Calamity Jane who curled up on Nicole's stomach. Sleep never came, she could only hope that the tapping she heard in the closet really was imaginary. 

Half way through the night she moved Calamity Jane, who fussed but returned to sleep quickly. Nicole tore off all of her clothing down to the flats. She set a fire in the fire place and made good on the promise she made to herself in the hospital. She watched it burn for minutes while she drank from the bottle before she walked over to the door where she kept her emergency go-bag. She put on the change of clothes that had been waiting in there for who knows how long, before she returned to her seat on the floor in front of the fire place. Nicole just stared at it blankly, enjoying how the fabric was burning down to ash. It made her feel in control, it made her happy to be rid of a part of the memory that was driving her crazy. To fully be rid of the memory, though, she'd have to burn the entire house down, and it didn't seem like a bad idea after she finished the bottle of rum. So easy, just get the gas from her trunk, sprinkle it around the living room, and open the fireplace door, lay on the couch and wait. So simple, so easy. But she didn't do it, she just continued to stare at the fire. But each and every time Nicole started to nod off, and she saw herself being attacked by the Widow, she came closer to doing it.

* * *

Sometime last night, Nicole returned to the couch, and she stayed there until there was a knock on her door, quarter past eleven. Nicole grabbed the pistol before she walked to the door, opening the door with her free hand while pressing the barrel against the wood of the door with her other hand. Nicole immediately pulled the door open fully and lowered the gun once she saw it was Waverly. 

“Glad to see you're being cautious, but should you really be holding a gun?” Waverly asked, gently coaxing the weapon from her girlfriend. 

“I have a right to be paranoid, Waverly.” Nicole's voice was heavy and tired. Waverly could tell by the darkened circles that Nicole hadn't been able to sleep last night.

“Of course you do, but paranoia and being ready to shoot the first stranger that knocks on your door are two different things.” Waverly replied as she followed Nicole to the couch. 

“It's fine, I know how to use it. I'm scared, not irrational.” Nicole finished. 

“I'm just worried, you went through a lot, it wouldn't be surprising if you were a little rattled.” Waverly spotted the empty beer bottles on the kitchen island as well as the empty rum bottle on the coffee table and knew that her assumptions Nicole would start drinking like Wynonna had were right. She listened vaugly to Nicole mumble out an “I'm not crazy” before Waverly posed her first question. “How was your first night back?” Waverly asked cautiously. 

“Hell.” Nicole replied flatly, she stared at the ground and played with her hands. “I keep hearing tapping noises from inside the closet, the tapping I did that no one heard...” Nicole's voice was grim and Waverly sighed sadly, regretting not investigating the tapping sooner. 

“I'm so sorry, Baby.” Waverly rubbed Nicole's back gently, she tried to comfort her girlfriend but in the situation, Waverly had no clue how, considering Nicole hadn't even looked at her since they sat down.

“It doesn't matter right now, we need to talk.” Nicole swallowed on her own words, before she turned to face Waverly. “Start from the beginning.” Nicole told the youngest Earp. Waverly recapped the two and a half weeks—two and half weeks before anyone figured it out—that the Widow posed as Nicole. Waverly started with how bad she truly felt about the text and told Nicole how the night she sent the text, she kissed Rosita. Nicole felt a knife tear through her heart when she found out, but she knew that it meant nothing and Nicole understood. 

“I get it, I hurt you, and that was the only way you knew how to hurt me back. It's okay, Waves. Keep going.” Nicole listened as Waverly moved onto explaining how she knew that something was off, but brushed it off because the Widow said that Waverly cheating on her really stung and that she was dealing with a lot of personal stuff. 

“I would never blame being horrible to you on that...” Nicole whispered sadly, intertwining their hands. Waverly continued to explain how the Widows staged Nicole's kidnapping to get the third seal and how Wynonna was going to shoot Nicole and then die for a few seconds, just to bring Nicole back like with what happened with Bobo. “She should have too, giving them the seal was stupid, I'm not more important than all of Purgatory, than the world.” Nicole sighed and that's when Waverly started to shed tears.

“I couldn't let her, I just couldn't. I thought I would lose you.” Nicole wanted to snap how that she had already been lost, for how many days at that point and no one cared, but instead Nicole just nodded in acceptance. 

“It's kind of sad, because Wynonna was the first one to suspect that something wasn't right with you. First one not to brush it off... I'm so sorry Nicole, I defended the Widow, I told Wynonna she was insane, it wasn't even you...” Waverly choked back sobs.

“It's too late to fix that shit now, continue...” Nicole had tears in her eyes. Waverly skipped the night she slept with the Widow and went straight to bringing the soup and finding the real Nicole at the bottom of the closet. She went on to explain how the doctors somehow fixed Mercedes, but the Widows killed her, and then Nicole was taken hostage along with several residents of Purgatory. Waverly fought tears as she recounted how she thought Nicole had died after Wynonna killed the Widows, how Waverly felt horrible because it meant that she could never make it up to Nicole, that she could never make things right. All the way to breaking the cast just to miraculously see that Nicole was whole again, without the majority of her senses, just for the Dr. Lewis to save her. 

“You're hiding something...” Nicole declared, it was too soon to be sure, but she was pretty positive that Waverly was still holding something back. “What else happened?” Waverly bit her bottom lip, and sniffled before she started.

“Nicole, after the Widow took Wynonna's gun, she was... seductive...” Nicole nearly puked, and her own tears came. “That's when I figured it out... she was so rough, so forceful... it hurt a lot. I-I slept with her, Nicole...” Waverly inched away, curling in on herself when Nicole stood and started pacing in front of her kitchen table, she pushed her hair back. 

“That bitch... that bitch hurt you? While wearing me? Wynonna should have left her alive so I could have killed the bitch first!” Nicole pushed the lamp down before turning her back on Waverly and walking to the kitchen island. She gripped it tightly, using her arms to hold up her upper body.

“I'm so sorry I did this to you Nicole, I'm so sorry.” Waverly said quickly, as if she had done it before. Nicole shook her head. 

“No, don't think it's your fault for a minute, the Widow hurt you, and no one protected you, that's not fucking fair!” Nicole's eyes flashed red. “Someone... should have done something.” Nicole growled out through gritted teeth. 

“I didn't tell anyone until after you were in the hospital. The Widow blamed it on how frustrated she had been and that she was sorry she took it out on me. After years of dealing with the same shit from Champ, I didn't it was bad. I just knew you weren't like that you didn't take it out on me, especially not during sex...” Nicole's anger turned to sorrow and she returned to the couch, she knelt in front of Waverly, who's eyes were shut tight. 

“Hey, I'm sorry I scared you, that's not okay, especially after what you told me. Look at me, Waves, hey, look at me.” Nicole cupped Waverly's face in her hands and brushed her cheek gently with her thumb. Waverly opened her eyes and stared into Nicole's. “Champ treated you like that too?” Waverly nodded. Nicole shook her head sadly. “Aw, Waves. No one deserves that, especially not you. Anyone who uses that excuse, anyone who blames you when they treat you like absolute shit, they're not decent enough to even look at you.” Nicole promised Waverly. Waverly felt horrible for the need to be comforted, but after Nicole said that, and opened up her arms, Waverly couldn't stop the sobs as she lunged forward to latch onto Nicole as the older woman wrapped her arms around Waverly, holding her close and stroking her hair. Even though Waverly felt guilty that she wasn't comforting Nicole right now, Nicole was happy she was able to be off the topic of what happened, Nicole understood now, that's all she wanted. And even though Waverly didn't know it, she explained why Ewan was desperate to get Nicole back in the cult. 

“It's okay, Baby, it's okay. They're not going to hurt you anymore.” Nicole continued to gently stroke Waverly's hair until the crying was too much and Waverly fell asleep in Nicole's arms. Nicole intended to explain the Shae situation further, but Waverly assured her that she understood. And for the first time since Alice was born, Nicole slept without disruption.

It was dark out when there was a knock on Nicole's door, it barely opened before Nicole shot up right, one arm wrapped around Waverly and the other going from grabbing her pistol to firing it in the direction of the door in a split second.

“GGGET OUUUT!” Nicole yelled, only finally truly waking up after she fired the gun. Waverly woke up at the sudden sound as well. 

“SHIT! Nicole!” Wynonna yelled, ducking her head down and holding her arms up in surrender. An inch away from where the bullet landed in the wall. “It's me!” Nicole's hands started to shake and she dropped the gun in horror after she realized that she just nearly shot her friend. Nicole slipped off the couch and stared at the weapon. 

“Nicole?” Waverly asked at Nicole's bleached features and terrified expression. 

“You were right, g-get it away from me, gg-g-get the gun away from me.” Waverly obeyed, she sat up as Nicole scampered away into the corner of the room, and she started to hyperventilate. The tiny Earp turned on the safety and threw the gun into the kitchen, not caring what broke. Wynonna came forward from the door, confused to see the typically strong red head so broken and terrified.

“Nicole?” Waverly coaxed, she came to the red head and cupped her face in her hands. “Nicole it's me, it's Waverly. You're safe, no one is going to hurt you ever again. I promise. Nicole, look at me. Breathe, it's okay, count to ten, breathe.” Waverly instructed she tried to calm Nicole from her panicked state.

“I'm horrible, I'm horrible, I'm weak. I deserve to die.” Nicole continued to repeat, unable to hear or see anyone in the present moment. She was back at the bottom of the closet, she was back at the police station, hoping Willa would stop aiming for her head, she was at her desk, fighting the Trophy demon, and losing, back in the barn, letting Mikshun manipulate her, she was back in Calgary watching her apartment burn with her girlfriend inside, she was back at her front door, The Widow looking at her like a meal.

“Nicole, come on snap out of it!” Waverly begged, horrified with how Nicole was staring right through her, as if she wasn't even there. 

“Waverly move over.” Wynonna ordered, before crouching in front of the red head. “Nicole, I'm kind of sorry for this.” With that, Wynonna slapped Nicole. Waverly protested but couldn't separate the two as easily as Wynonna had. The tall woman didn't respond. “Come on, Nicole, fight back!” Wynonna backhanded Nicole from the other side, it left Nicole with a split lip, Nicole gave some response, breathing out a weak “Waverly” before returning to her original state. Waverly begged Wynonna to stop. “Dammit Haught!” Wynonna shook the woman by her shirt collar, before she pulled Nicole to her feet. Now the woman had a good three inches on Wynonna, but it didn't stop the eldest Earp. Waverly continued to beg Wynonna to stop, but the Earp heir knew it was the only way.  
“Fight back Nicole, I know you have some strength left in you. Snap out of it!” Wynonna let go of Nicole before stepping aside. Nicole fell forward, barely catching herself as she hit the ground. Nicole only felt as if she was battling another demon she couldn't beat another demon she was too weak to beat. “Defend yourself, for every situation you couldn't, fight back! And if you won't fight for yourself, fight for Waverly! She's next once you're done!” Wynonna lied threateningly, and Nicole pushed herself up on her forearms, she stared at the ground while red seeped into her eyes. She went from the ground to ramming Wynonna into the couch and causing it to fall back, leaving them both on the ground. 

Nicole's breathing was slow and deep, and her eyes reverted back to their typical colour by the time she opened them again. “I'm sorry.” She muttered weakly, sad to cause such a commotion. Waverly rushed over, putting the couch upright before helping them up individually.

“It's okay Haught. I'm sorry about your lip.” Wynonna replied truthfully followed by a groan. “But what the hell was that?” Wynonna grunted as she leaned against the couch. 

“I think it was a panic attack.” Waverly answered as she helped Nicole around to sit on the couch. Nicole had no clue how she and Wynonna ended up on their backs and how the couch hand been flipped over.

“And that was hella strong for someone who the doctors said had muscle atrophy.” Wynonna said with a rasp to her voice.  
“I don't know what happened. I just felt like I succumbed to the weakest parts of me. And then I heard you threaten Waverly... and I realized there was something to fight for.” Waverly felt honoured, but it also made her sad to think that Nicole didn't find her own life worth it.

“You're going to hate me after this, but the doctor didn't give you PTSD meds?” Wynonna asked while using her hand to rub the shoulder that took the impact from the fall. Nicole glared.

“I'm not crazy.” Nicole defended. 

“Haught, I was on crazy meds and I was miserable, but the only ones I stayed on after I was released were the ones for PTS. They helped, and I eventually quit taking them because I could go to sleep without being haunted by what happened that night.” Waverly wondered why Wynonna wasn't taking them now that she saved Alice. 

“It doesn't matter if they would help, he didn't prescribe them.” Nicole pointed out. 

“Well I bet they didn't expect you to start sleep-shooting.” Wynonna defended, motioning to the bullet hole in the wall.

“Why are you here, Wynonna?” Nicole asked, desperate to change the subject, she didn't want help and she didn't need it either. She was fine, just jumpy.

“It's only eight thirty, but no one had heard from either of you at all and we were worried. Plus, Dolls wanted to talk to you, Nicole. He told me to let you know it would be quick.” Nicole nodded, before she glanced at Waverly. 

“I'll see you later?” Nicole asked. Waverly nodded with an “of course” and a kiss. Nicole stood up and began to make her way but Wynonna stopped Nicole from walking past her. 

“You sure you should be driving right now, Haughtshot?” Nicole mustered the strength she needed to break away from Wynonna's grasp. 

“Don't worry, I'm not going to try to run you over too.” Nicole grabbed her jacket and looked at Waverly warmly.  
“Lock up when you leave, okay?” Waverly smiled and nodded. Nicole walked out, shutting the door behind her. Wynonna didn't speak until the sound of the engine became distant. 

“I don't feel like she should be driving.” Wynonna restated, looking pleadingly at Waverly. 

“I think it'll help her cool down, she's always at her calmest in a car.” Waverly smiled at the memories of driving with Nicole, the blissful peace of it all. “Could you do something for me Wynonna?” Waverly asked, Wynonna nodded quickly. “Neither Nicole or I can go in her room again, could you grab some of her clothes and her uniform and bring them out?” Wynonna nodded sadly in understanding.

“Of course, Baby-girl.” 

* * *

Nicole pulled up in her parking spot and entered the police station quietly, she was happy that Nedley was in his office and going over paperwork, or else he'd give her hell for leaving her house. When she entered the Black Badge offices, no one but Dolls was there. He sat back in his chair, looking at a confidential folder. 

“I always found that such an odd name, Haught... odd but familiar.” Dolls turned the folder and threw it on the desk. Nicole walked up to see a picture of her parents and Ewan with a red question mark in the corner. She looked it over, there was a short family tree, her dad's parents, her own, then Ewan next to a unknown female. “This isn't even my clearance level. Nicole Haught, I assume the daughter of Nicholas and Carrie Haught, and Ewan, is he your brother? Cousin?” 

“He was supposed to be my husband... I ran away barely a year prior.” Nicole closed the folder, tears in her eyes. “Dolls, you have to understand, I left that life behind a long time ago. I want no part of the cult except in destroying it.”

“You knew coming back to Purgatory would be dangerous, especially after you found out about Black Badge. You had to know I'd figure it out.” Dolls accused. He leaned forward, resting his forearms on the table. 

“Of course I did. I came back for revenge, then I heard about Waverly, then I met her, and it wasn't about revenge anymore. It was about being happy, and keeping her safe and away from the cult. Clearly, I did a piss poor job.” Nicole explained. 

“Why didn't you tell anyone?” Dolls asked blankly. 

“Because for all I knew, they wouldn't get as far into their Satanist crap as they have. I thought that Bulshar would never rise or ever come so close to it.” 

“You realize I have questions, right?” Dolls told her and she nodded.

“I'm happy to answer on one condition.” Dolls waited for her to continue. “No one else hears what we talked about, all of the new information is from the Black Badge archives and you let me help rip apart the cult, member by member.” Dolls nodded and held out his hand for Nicole to shake. 

“It's a deal.” They shook on it and he motioned towards the chair opposite to him. “Take a seat.” She obeyed and Dolls started. “Why does the cult have leaders all from the same blood line?”

“It's all from when Clootie was human, or passed off as one. He entrusted his closest friend to take on his spirit if his body was not ready to rise when he was freed. Possession. The spell went through his blood line, his descendants. Bulshar insisted on having a male host and gave specific instructions if the current potential host was female at the time of his rise. I was the first female descendant. That's why Ewan and I were supposed to be married. So they could mix the host's blood with his and turn him into the new host.”

“Why so early?” Nicole shook her head at the question. 

“He could have risen at any time, and the host has be under thirty and over sixteen, in their prime so their body is strong enough to hold Bulshar.” Nicole sighed in disgust at the memory. “Bulshar will take a female host if he has to but it all involves a really complicated spell and a human sacrifice and it's hard to explain.” Nicole closed her eyes and shook away the image. “I am the host, the cult calls it Bulshar's throne or the heir of Bulshar. I'm the only one Bulshar can take, and if I turn thirty without physically having my own child and without being taken over by Bulshar, it's over, no more chance for Bulshar to rise. He's gone.” Nicole smiled proudly. “The curse won't matter, Wynonna and Waverly won't have to worry about the Rev's coming back anymore, and Wynonna and Doc will get Alice back.” Nicole spoke.

“How many years do you have left?” Dolls asked.

“Not even four. Less, three and a half at most.” Nicole replied quickly. 

“What happens if Bulshar does possess you?” Dolls asked. Nicole shrugged. 

“I don't know, but I hope Peacemaker can take me out before I do much damage.” Nicole answered truthfully. 

“Let's hope that it doesn't come down to that.” Dolls replied and Nicole nodded in agreement. 

“What pushed you to leave the cult?” Dolls asked.

“I had a brain of my own, I don't want to rule the world, I never wanted to. But I think it was finding out that I had to marry Ewan and that the blood fusion spell involved a lot of shit I wasn't down for. One of which was having to have my first time with a dude and that I had to give up my “fling and phase” with my girlfriend at the time.” Dolls nodded in sad silence.

“So you two moved to Calgary, I assume you used fake ID and bought something to live in.” Nicole nodded. 

“Fake names and all, it didn't slow them down much, they found us, Ewan killed her, my parents burned the entire apartment complex down to the ground. My boss let me move into an apartment upstairs in exchange for twice the shifts and a quarter of my paycheck cut per month. I saved up until I could go through the police academy. We all went to Nevada as a pre-graduation celebration That's how I met Shae. We planned on divorcing as soon as we met new people since we were separated. But after I moved to Purgatory she knew it'd be cruel to leave me in a situation where my parents would be contacted in an emergency. We're planning on divorcing now that Waverly knows, now that I can make her my emergency contact.” Dolls listened to the story.

“So you do love her? You're not trying to get close to Wynonna to stab them in the back.” Despite acting like such a total grouch towards both Earps, he genuinely cared about both of them. More than he cared to admit. He cared about Nicole too, but he didn't know how to feel after he discovered this new information about Purgatory's favourite red head.

“Of course I love her. She's everything to me. Even if I never left the cult, I'd take Wynonna's cause before I ever agreed with the cult and their cause.” Dolls looked at Nicole, he made sure to be observant for any sign of lies. 

“Why is the curse over if Bulshar's throne fails reproduce? Why can't he just return in his true form?”

“I was taught that, to truly return, there were a lot of requirements that had to be met, for example two pieces of the ritual are the offspring of his throne and the offspring of an Earp, both had to be under ten months old. Which is why Beth wanted to feed Wynonna's baby to Bulshar. There are more pieces to the puzzle than that too, and Bulshar kept many of the pieces a secret, because the same things that could free him, could kill him once he arose.” Nicole took a deep breath. “Or at least that's what my parents told me. I doubt anything they taught me was true.” 

Dolls racked his mind for all the questions he had, but there were more that came each time he thought of it. 

“Nicole? Would you know if you were possessed by Bulshar?” She shook her head. 

“If I was possessed by Bulshar, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be sitting in front of you, he'd be way stronger than me, and he'd be right at the surface. He wouldn't pretend to be good, because he'd have to power to stop anybody who opposed him. There's no way I'm possessed right now, if that's what you're implying.” Dolls nodded.

“Good to know. Thank you, Nicole. I should let you go.” She stood up as if leaving a therapy session, it felt nice to confide in someone. “Wait, Nicole,” Dolls stood and walked up to her before he gave her an extremely awkward hug. “I'm really glad that you're okay.” He said before he pulled away and cleared his throat. “Now, go home it's getting late.” He returned to his serious, orderly tone that he typically used. Nicole obeyed and returned home. 

Once again she was met by visions of her battle with the Widow once she opened the front door, and despite going nowhere near her bedroom, she continued to hear tapping. Nicole had to remind herself that she was imagining all of it, because if that was reality, Nicole did not want to live in it. 

Nicole came to the couch after opening her bottle of Brandy, just to see a neat pile of her clothes on the floor.  
Halfway through another one of Nicole's sleepless nights, there was a knock on her door, followed by an announcement through the door not to shoot. Wynonna entered Nicole's home, a bottle of the good vodka in hand. The eldest Earp took a seat next to Nicole, put the two glasses she brought with her onto the table, and poured each of them a glass nearly to the brim. They sat, they didn't talk, and they drank. Despite it being the smallest of gestures, and the most irrelevant, it was the most comfort either woman had felt since their traumas took place.

Just before dawn, Wynonna poured them each a shot and raised her glass before she slurred a toast to Waverly. Nicole followed suit, and after they each downed their glass, Wynonna took the remaining vodka and left. 

Nicole couldn't help but feel guilty for her developing alcoholism, but after the events with the Widow, and the looming threat Ewan held over her, Nicole had no other way to figure out how to cope, especially while she wasn't able to return to work. Nicole knew all too well that eventually she'd have to make up her behavior to the youngest Earp.  
She just hoped that once the time to do so came, she'd be able to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is an edit on the notes, I wanted to upload chap. 13 today but my laptop is broken and so I've been re-writing it on mobile. I plan to upload it soon.


	13. Too Many People Can Fix Everyone but Themselves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning for suicidal thougts and actions, and self hate.

Nicole went back to the hospital once between the time she was released and before she returned to work, which is one more trip she did not want to deal with. She waited for three hours in the waiting room for what she expected to be a twenty minute visit. Eventually, Dr. Lewis greeted her and they entered his office.

“So how have you been, Nicole?” He asked as he looked over her body cautiously, Nicole thought he was checking for external injury or for any development in her physical state. Dr. Lewis was truly focused on checking that she hadn't actually transformed into what he turned her into. 

Nicole considered being dishonest, but she knew that if she was cleared to go back to work and she had a panic attack in the middle of a job, it could not only hurt her career, but the lives of civilians as well. “Not great.” She replied honestly just before he sat down at his desk. 

“Oh? Why not?” He asked, he took a glance at her charts. He was well aware that he needed to proceed with caution, but he also wanted to see what would trigger the change.

“I'm not sleeping, haven't been since my recovery.” Nicole began, she needed help, no matter how much she didn't want it. “Every time I walk into my home I remember the attack, even though all the injuries have healed, I still can't even look at my bedroom door, I constantly hear a thud that I made with my hand from the closet I was trapped in. I nearly shot my friend before I was completely awake because I thought she was going to hurt myself and Waverly. I don't feel safe and the more time I spend at home the worse it is.” Dr. Lewis took notes, not of what she was saying, but that fear and sadness didn't cause her to react... negatively. 

“This is a completely reasonable reaction after what you've been through, you likely are suffering from post traumatic stress disorder, and I wish I had asked you about these kind of things before you returned home. It'll take time to fix, and it's likely that your home is a trigger. Have you considered staying somewhere else?” 

“Don't really have anywhere else to go.” Nicole replied truthfully. 

“What about Waverly, she was with you the majority of the time you were here, could you stay with her?” Nicole shook her head after the doctor made the suggestion. 

“She has her own shit to deal with, and she's helping her sister cope with what happened to her.” The doctor swallowed.

“Yes... speaking of Waverly, have you considered taking a break with her?”

“What?” Nicole was shocked at the suggestion, it pissed her off too.

“She could be a trigger just as much as the home is, she wasn't there for you when you most needed her, that must make you upset, the fact she didn't even realize your absence.”

“How _dare_ you,” Nicole accused. “Waverly is the only person who has been there for me in a positive manner, and you want me to stop seeing the one person that can help me sleep, the one person who hasn't left me.” Red leaked into her eyes and the doctor wrote “ANGER” on his sheet. He should have guessed, and was embarrassed for not just assuming. 

“I understand. I was just thinking, are you relying your recovery on her?” He asked. If he broke the two women apart, Nicole would be weak, if she was brokenhearted, she might even return to the Bulshar cult.

“No, but she is one of the two reasons I am recovering.” Nicole glared at the doctor while he asked her what the other reason was. “So I can do my job and save people, maybe spare them the pain of going through what I went through.” Dr. Lewis pretended to take a moment to let her comment sink in. 

“Well, Nicole, I only have one more question for you,” He paused dramatically, “Do you believe you are fit enough to return to work?” 

“I think going back to work will help me, if I have the right support and assistance.” 

“I'm going to give you some medication to help you sleep, and I think you should take time at least twice a month to see a therapist, if not a psychiatrist.” Dr. Lewis wrote Nicole a prescription, he knew full well that her nightmares would continue, and that now, she wouldn't be able to wake up from them. It would drive her even crazier than the insomnia was. He insisted that she had to wait a couple weeks, but that she should return to the police force soon.

Less than a week after the appointment, Wynonna paid Nicole a second visit, to discuss what they arranged in Nicole's last day in the hospital. Wynonna handed Nicole a bag, and even let a few teas slide past her wall of sarcasm and functioning-alcoholism. 

“You don't have to if you're not up for it, I'd understand.” Wynonna finally offered to let Nicole free of her promise.

“Wynonna, I couldn't back out if I tried. Do... do you have anything you want me to say?” Wynonna scoffed to suppress a sob before she shook he head.

“I think you already know.” Nicole stood and walked towards her front door, Nicole could almost hear Wynonna crumble. She gently put the bag on the ground, before she marched back over to Wynonna and held the grieving woman close as she sobbed uncharacteristically in Nicole's arms.

“You're a great mom.” Nicole whispered. “The day she meets you and Doc will be the best of her life.” Nicole stayed with Wynonna after that, but only briefly. 

* * *

Nicole drove all the way, a seventeen hour drive, and she didn't stop once. Once she pulled up next to Gus' address, She took a couple hours to rest and relax in her car before the older woman came and knocked on her window.

Nicole rose from her car quickly to be greeted with a hug from the Earp girls guardian. “Hi Ms. McCready.” Nicole said.

“You can call me Gus until you break Waverly's heart, you understand me.” Nicole nodded at the very brief shovel talk. She hoped that she would always be able to call her Gus. “The little Alice Michelle is up, if you want to come in.” Gus said quickly. Nicole grabbed the bag tightly and followed Gus into her apartment silently.

She entered the apartment to see a portable crib in the living area. Inside the crib was a tiny baby that was barely over a month old. Nicole gingerly made her way to the crib just to see the baby smile happily at her with gums out for the world to see. The tall red head took at seat on the couch right behind the crib.

“You can pick her up you know.” Gus encouraged. Nicole looked back at the woman nervously before she was given a reassuring nod. Nicole placed the bag down on the couch cushion next to hers and bent over to carefully take the baby into her arms.

“Hey you.” Nicole gave the baby the brightest smile she'd had since she recovered. “I'm Nicole, I'm friends with your mama and papa. I know your auntie too.” Nicole cradled the baby carefully in her right arm and brought the bag close with the other. “Your mama and papa sent some things for me to give to you.” The first thing Nicole pulled out of the bag was a baby girl's body suit, it was plain white except for the black stetson on the front and back of the garment. 

“I think this one is from your daddy.” Nicole said as she showed the young child. She laid the body suit across her lap and pulled out the second gift, it was a baby bottle that was shaped to match a beer bottle, and the label read “It's FORMULA, I'll save the WHISKY for later.” Nicole wondered how hard that one was for Wynonna to find. Gus shook her head in the corner of the room, amused due to how classically the gift screamed “Wynonna”.

“There's only one more gift but I think you'll like it the best.” Nicole said as she fished out a pacifier. There wasn't much detail, it had a basic blue rim and a white back, but on the back of the soother was a flame scribbled in a red and black permanent marker. The baby almost took the soother immediately and began to suck on it. Nicole smiled. She had wanted to be a mom her whole life, but she couldn't risk it with the Bulshar situation, she didn't want to make anyone go through that. So when the time is right, she would adopt, or she wouldn't be the one to carry.

After a multitude of photos and feeding the baby formula with her new bottle, Nicole decided she would have to go. Gus protested, even recommended that Nicole should stay the night.

“No, Waverly is probably worried sick and I would rather not worry her more than I might already have. Besides, I don't sleep anymore anyways.” Nicole nodded at Gus kindly. “Thank you ma'am.” Nicole spoke softly on her way out. She jogged the entire way to her car as she heard Gus yell that she was “Five years at least from the ma'am age!” after her.

Nicole got gas and drove straight through all the way to Purgatory. It actually surprised Nicole that she made it to town before the library closed. She wanted to print out the photos for Wynonna. As she waited for the last photo to print, she sent Wynonna a text. 

My place. Half hour. Bring Doc.

It was a simple message but it got the point across well enough. After she paid for the print outs, Nicole made her way to the liquor store and bought a new bottle of whisky. She felt it was the least she could do, for both the unfortunate parents and herself. 

They were on time. That was something Nicole noticed right away when Wynonna and Doc knocked on her door as she finished nursing her first glass of alcohol. Wynonna was rarely ever on time. Nicole called out instead of going to the door. 

“Don't shoot me, Haught.” Wynonna called back before she opened the door. Nicole realized the chance of her living that down was truly slim. 

“Take a seat.” Nicole motioned her hand towards the couch where two untouched glasses of whisky sat. As they made their way over she poured herself another one.

“How is she?” Doc asked immediately as they sat down. Nicole took a shaky breath as she placed down the bottle.

“She's amazing. So healthy, so so adorable.” Nicole chuckled. “She has your chin, Doc, and she has your nose...” Nicole pulled out the hidden folder of photos and opened it. She placed the pictures down on the new coffee table and pushed them towards the young girl's parents. 

“Y-you took photos?” Wynonna started to cry and Doc's tears weren't far behind as he shakily picked up the photos. Some of them just contained a baby with a wide smile and scrunched up nose while others contained the soother and the baby jumper. The last couple were of Gus feeding Alice with her new bottle.

“She's... she's...” Doc lowered the rim of his hat and covered his eyes with his hand as he started to weep, he subconsciously leaned into Wynonna in the process, who was also too emotional for words.

“Absolutely gorgeous.” Nicole finished for them. Nicole swore she saw Mercedes standing in front of her bedroom door through the corner of her eye but forced herself to realize that it wasn't real. Mercedes was six feet under, and the thing that hurt Mercedes, the Widow, was burning in hell. And Nicole owed that to Wynonna. It was the least she could do to give Wynonna a connection to her daughter.

“Thank you Nicole... thank you.” Nicole understood that Wynonna couldn't risk something following her to Alice. It was a cruel punishment. And Nicole hated herself for not telling Wynonna about her parents or her upbringing. Because if Wynonna knew... she'd beat Nicole senseless. And in all honesty, Nicole wanted to tell Wynonna solely because she deserved that beating. 

“The jumper fit perfectly.” Nicole said quietly. The remainder of the visit was filled with crying, silence, and the three of them polishing off the bottle of whisky. Right as Wynonna and Doc were leaving, Nicole asked a question.

“What do I tell Waverly?” Wynonna shrugged. 

“I don't know, tell her you went on a road trip to clear your head before your first day back. She's freaked so she might come over.” Nicole nodded and the eldest Earp left the house. Nicole shut the door and looked at the prescription she bought but hadn't touched due to her ego and her “old fashioned ways”. She grabbed her half finished glass of whisky and brought it to the kitchen island. She popped one of the pills and took a drink to wash it down. Nicole's mind started to get the better of her, the tapping from her closet drove her nuts, the fact that she knew it wasn't actually happening pissed her off even more.

“It's not fake you know...” Nicole snapped her head back to see the Widow... the Widow in her skin, advance from the front door. Nicole turned her head back immediately, she chose to stare at the island.

“You're not real, you're dead.” Nicole countered through gritted teeth. 

“No, sweetie, you're the one who's dead. And this is hell. Part of you knows it, you can't live through what you lived through and be human.” The Widow continued to taunt and Nicole covered her eyes with her hands to prevent herself from engaging in the hallucination.

“You're not real...” Nicole growled out again, she continued to repeat the reassurance as the Widow taunted her. She refused to pull her hands away. Soon, the taunting stopped completely and Nicole was trapped in a whole nightmare. A flash of every time she wasn't strong enough to fight back, completed by her back at the bottom of that goddamn closet but she watched the Widow... hurt Waverly, followed by a kiss. 

Waverly had texted Nicole and left message after message. It was just after eight when the young woman decided she had to go to Nicole's. Waverly knocked on the door passively. “Nicole?” The young Earp twisted the handle and peeked inside. “Nic?” Waverly's heart froze when she saw Nicole passed out at the kitchen island. “No, no, no.” Waverly ran over in a panic and lifted Nicole's head out of her arms. Nicole was limp and still.

“Not again, I just got you back.” Waverly looked at the woman and finally realized that the older woman was breathing. Waverly cried a sob of relief as she clutched Nicole to her chest tightly. Soon after, Nicole stirred, just to wake up in confusion.

“W-Waves?” Nicole mumbled into the small woman's shirt tiredly. “What's going on?” The red head subconsciously took one hand and grasped Waverly's shoulder.

“Nothing... everything is fine. I was just worried.” Nicole pulled away and saw Waverly's teary eyes. Waverly knew Nicole was going to ask what was really wrong. “I'm scared too.” Was all Waverly managed to add. It was all Nicole needed to hug Waverly tightly.   
The week between the last doctor's appointment and her first day at work went by all to quickly. Nicole had an eventful first day, three B'n'E's, four public drunken disturbances, and one hijacking. All before six pm. She was in the office for hours after just to fill out the paper work. Nicole was relieved that she hadn't had a panic attack and that she hadn't stalled. She could only hope that her lucky streak would continue. She was on her last report when she heard a knock from the door to the cubicles. 

“Hey, you're here late.” Waverly spoke warmly. Nicole smiled at her girlfriend as the shorter woman approached.

“Making up for lost time.” Nicole answered quietly. Waverly initiated a kiss and Nicole tried not to show her hesitance. That was one issue she hadn't gotten over no matter how many kisses Waverly gave or how comfortable the young woman was, was what the Widow did, it made Nicole's blood boil at the thought, and Nicole didn't know what was too much or too little. Nicole definitely didn't know how Waverly could stand to see, let alone kiss, the face of the thing that assaulted her. It was a topic they'd have to discuss on a later date.

“How was it? Any.... any issues?” Waverly didn't mean to tip-toe but she didn't want to be blunt either. She eased herself onto Nicole's desk as she waited for the red head's reply.

“You mean did I have a panic attack after hallucinated getting the shit kicked out of me by the thing that stole my face?” Nicole replied bluntly, she smiled weakly and shook her head. “No. I'm fine, today went well.” Nicole answered truthfully.

“I'm glad.” Waverly placed her hand on top of Nicole's, and the red head hadn't noticed she had been shaking until the contact. “But either you aren't as okay as you claim to be or you're freezing to death.” Waverly told her girlfriend with concern. The more tiny things Waverly noticed about Nicole, the worse she felt about not realizing that the Widow had taken her place. 

“I-I didn't realize,” Nicole watched her hand with confusion. “I'm tired, and sober, that must be why.” The officer rationalized simply. 

“Nicole,” 

“I'm fine, Waves, really, the only thing that could have made this day better was if I had gotten more time with you.” Waverly's heart melted at the warm words coming from Nicole's lips. 

“Aw... I could say the same.” Waverly spoke endearingly, and squeezed Nicole's hand gently. “I could wait up, we could go to the homestead after, watch a movie.” Nicole smiled, exhaustion evident in her eyes. 

“I'd love that, I really would, but I think Wynonna still needs you, I'm okay. Maybe tomorrow, maybe we could have a bonfire or something just as grand and romantic and distracting.” Nicole suggested hopefully. Waverly tried to argue that Wynonna had been doing a lot better in the past week, but Nicole waved it off. “Tonight I actually might manage to sleep.” The red head justified.

“Really, you'd want to do that?” Nicole shrugged with a nod and a smile. 

“Yeah, I would. I think it would be fun. Would you?” Nicole asked. Waverly couldn't launch herself into the hug any faster.

“I'd love to.” Waverly said happily into Nicole's neck. It had been too long since the five of them had spent time together without fear or stress to intervene.

“Okay, I'll tell Doc so he can help me prep it, you tell Wynonna and Dolls.” Nicole smiled, and she carefully kissed Waverly.

“You better-”

“Don't worry, you and Wynonna get to light it, no doubt there.” Nicole reassured. Waverly grinned. “Go home, rest, I'll see you tomorrow.” Nicole sent Waverly off, and the ginger haired officer was proud to have made the young Earp's day. Nicole was only at the station shortly after that, and drove home. 

Nicole took a few deep breaths before she opened the door, and watched herself fight the Widow futilely for the hundredth time. 

“It's not real,” Nicole told herself as she walked through the scene, she flinched as the Widow swung a punch that went through the real Nicole's chest without harm. “It's not real,” Nicole repeated stiffly as she hung up her coat. “You beat her. You won.” Nicole blinked after the Widow began to rip apart the memory Nicole, and the scene disappeared. “it can't happen again.” The young officer made her way to her bathroom and was faced with a dreadful sight in the mirror. She saw herself, faceless, a lump of meat, nothing but flesh. Despite everything in her screaming that it wasn't real, Nicole couldn't catch her breath. The red head looked over the reflection and felt her face simultaneously as she searched for inaccuracies. For one, she was able to see, she had eyes, her nose was still there, and so were her ears, all things the reflection lacked.

“No, Haught, it's not real.” Nicole told herself, as she finally grasped the situation. The woman left her bathroom, just to see someone in a Bulshar cloak seated at her kitchen island. 

“What the hell are you doing here Ewan.” She growled out lowly. They took off the hood of their cloak to reveal a man with auburn salt and pepper hair. Nicole nearly fell to the ground.

“Get out.” Her voice was weaker than she intended, but she wasn't able to bring the strength to her voice that was needed. “I said get out.” Her voice was slightly stronger, but it did not carry the threatening tone she wanted to enforce.

“Hello, Nicole.” Nicolas Haught turned around on his seat to face her. “I must say, I'm rather disappointed in you.”

“What's new?” Nicole replied venomously. She walked over to the other side of the island calmly, and looked at Nicolas with as little hate as she could muster. “Why are you here?” He smiled menacingly.

“You return to Purgatory, don't tell us and it isn't until Ewan collected the weapon that we even knew you were back? And working with the Earp girls? Dating an Earp, I'm honestly disgusted. They're the enemy.” Nicole had opened the intended drawer at this point and managed to get her head on straight. The red head found herself eerily calm.

“Fuck you too, Dad.” Nicole threw her arm up, hand secured around her pistol. She was about to pull the trigger when Nicholas grabbed the gun and swung it down to the left, unable to hit him.

“Surrecturus, Dominus.” Nicole's iris' turned a blood red and the woman's demeanour changed almost entirely. Nicole looked around the room. 

“I am sorry to interfere, my lord, but I must ask. Why have you not completely taken over yet? She could ruin everything if she figured it out.” Nicole took a moment.

“Ewan told me about you in the hospital, Nicolas, you have no reason to apologize. I must insist you do not doubt me. I am still weak, and your daughter's spirit is... stronger than I expected from a female vessel, in more ways than one. I need time, In all honesty it would be easier if she killed an innocent.” Nicolas was clearly confused by Nicole's explanation. “It would tint her enough for me to get a good grip. Even now, she's confused, she sees it all, feels it. It's as if she is... “black out drunk” as she would say, she's there, but not in complete control, and she likely will not remember.” Nicolas nodded in some understanding, in the past he may have not appreciated completely losing the young woman, but now his only vision included the God that possessed her.

“Nicolas, did you hear that?” The man looked up at the red iris' that burned his very soul. 

“Yes, she has no clue that you've invaded.” Nicole shook her head.

“I said, you must prepare the others, we have a war to win and I do not plan on losing. If they aren't ready, you will be the one to pay.”

“But, I no longer hold true power, Ewan-”

“Ewan, is not a Haught, it was not his blood line that was loyal to me, he is not a Haught, if he was, I would have possessed him.” Nicole stared Nicolas in the eye. “You are the leader of my Cult, Nicolas, and you will be until I can truly take over.” Nicole leaned back against the counter as Nicolas folded his hands onto the island.

“I apologize for being defiant, my Lord.” Nicole nodded in understanding before she examined her nails methodically.

“If it happens again, I'll rip out your throat with your daughter's hands. I'd just suggest you bring back the girl now and run out the back door as quickly as you can.” Nicole looked at him with a dead expression. “Someone is coming.”

Nicolas spoke the same chant, only backwards, almost like spoken Da Vinci Code. And Nicole held her her head in pain. In the time her eyes were shut he ran, Nicole became aware when she heard the back door slam. Her head was reeling, and she was so confused and scared, so scared. Nicolas had been here, and she remembered walking through the door and then nothing. Did she imagine it, did she imagine her father? Despite no logical reason for her being able to imagine what he would look like after eleven years, she still thought she was losing it. 

Nicole slid down to the ground as she cradled her head and tucked her knees to her chest.

“Who says I'm wrong?” The Widow asked, right by her ear. “Who says you're worth it, that you're not crazy?” 

Nicole managed to break out of the fetal position long enough to grab the gun from the cupboard. She took a deep breath and quickly placed the barrel to her temple.

“One bullet goes a long way.” The Widow urged. Nicole slammed the gun against her head a couple times, it was a sad attempt at trying to get rid of the Widow. Eventually, she tossed onto the floor, away from her so she couldn't be tempted.

“Officer Haught?” It was Dolls at the door. He knocked a few times. “Are you home, or awake? I have some things to ask you.” Nicole wiped her tears away. She took a long sniff through her nose and shakily got onto a stool. 

“Yeah, I'm here...” But that was what bothered Nicole, she didn't know if she was, she didn't know if this was real, or if she was hallucinating or dreaming, more importantly, she didn't know if she was still her, still Nicole.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next chapter is going to be nice. I swear. 
> 
> Hopefully the LONG wait was worth it, mobile is impossible to write on, and now my Mac is finally fixed. I'm already halfway through the next chapter so you'll see that soon. Hope you enjoyed/aren't hurt by this. If I need to put any other trigger warnings PLEASE tell me.


	14. Campfires and Reckless Behaviour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a little bit of a break for Ms. Haught. A little bit.

That night was a set back for Nicole, but the fact that Dolls came over so soon afterwards and forced her to get it together, she decided it may have saved her. He had questions about why the Cult had gone silent, hadn't made a move. He also asked about her lineage but she couldn't truly answer that. She didn't really know about her lineage, only what slim truth her family may have told her. 

Now, Nicole and Doc were prepping the largest pile of wood, the Widow was still whispering in her ear, but staying busy seemed to help her emotionally. And she enjoyed talking with Doc, it was always enjoyable. Behind the bull dog act, he was an absolute puppy if you got to know him.

After Dolls got back from picking up the food and burgers, Dolls took the best pieces of wood and set up a fire.

Jeremy, Wynonna and Waverly were chatting by the grill happily as the burgers cooked. 

When the sun began to set, Dolls brought out the flame throwers and gave one to each of the Earp girls. Nicole wished she had taken video of how the girls went to town. By the time they were done, the fire was two and a half meters high and they were worried the surrounding trees were in danger of being lit.

The group sat on lawn chairs or logs that were circled around half of the fire. Wynonna passed the couple on the log and squeezed Nicole's shoulder in comfort despite the cheery facade. The eldest Earp took a seat on the lawn chair closest to her sister. 

The group listened happily as Jeremy geeked out about how incorrect Grey's Anatomy was, which somehow lead to him going on about the first real world Transformer.

Nicole ran inside to grab more ice for the cooler, and saw a guitar on the way back out. Nicole smiled devilishly as she brought it with her.

“Oh no, you found it” came from Waverly and a “Jesus shit, Nicole.” from Wynonna. The red head had played a little bit in high-school and was fairly confident she could still pluck a few notes.

“Why, I am far too sober for this.” Doc spoke quickly as he reached for the bourbon in the cooler. Wynonna cursed under her breath but stood, ready to bite the bullet for a few laughs.

“Hit it Haughtpants!” Nicole had no clue if Wynonna would know the song, but the heir had no need for lyrics as she created her own, funny ones about Purgatory and the “shit-head Revenants” once Wynonna closed with a long, out of tune “and my big ass magic guuuuun” the group cheered and even Dolls was cracking up. Waverly whispered into Nicole's ears and the red head nodded.

Nicole plucked a few wrong notes before she managed to destroy her fingers while Waverly, and later joining Jeremy and Wynonna, all struggled to sing Mari Mack by Great Big Sea. Nicole threw the last chord before she grabbed her own hand in comfort. After Waverly refused to play guitar because she only knew “sad songs” they opted to play a Spotify playlist Jeremy found called “Turnt” and it was followed by Doc asking many questions, leading with “What on Earth is Spotify?” followed with “Okay, now, Jeremy, what is a turnt?” 

“How are you feeling?” Waverly asked Nicole as the red head sat down with another beer.

“I'm good, really good.”the red head answered truthfully, despite the Widow still talking her down. Waverly smiled and kissed Nicole. The officer reciprocated like she used to, genuinely and lovingly, for the first time in a long time.

“I missed that.” Waverly spoke warmly. “A kiss without fear or guilt, just love.” Waverly snuggled into Nicole's shoulder and both omen knew that later they would have to discuss boundaries, but for the moment it was bliss even if Nicole had to listen to the raging bitch that her head had manifested. 

Dolls had finally had enough beers to tell a story from the past and he opted for one where a guy was picking on Jeremy after he'd been recruited and how Dolls showed him who not to mess with at a bar the night after. “And that's how I got the scar right here. He couldn't get a hit after that.” It was barely anything on his dark skin, just a slightly lighter patch that ran about an inch long on his hand from a beer bottle being broken on it.

Doc decided to prove he was still a killer shot while drunk to high heaven, so he set three empty bottles on the barbecue lid. He shot and successfully shattered each one, followed by a “Maybe it was not the greatest idea of my life time.” From the cowboy, who followed through with a burp. 

The fire did not die down until the early hours of the morning, and everyone was hammered by that point, Doc and Waverly seemed to hold their liquor the best, mainly because they had the least amount of alcohol. The group had moved inside and had taken to karaoke. Waverly and Jeremy sang the Periodic Table Song, and Wynonna and Nicole had taken to Piano Man. Doc did not know any song that was available on karaoke (which he still couldn't pronounce right) and Dolls sang—somewhat unexpectedly—some sort of Gavin DeGraw song. Eventually, much to Nicole's dismay, Jeremy and Wynonna pulled her off the couch so the four of them could sing “It's Okay To Be Gay” by A Great Big Sea. Wynonna insisted that she was just being supportive, Nicole rolled her eyes, even more so when the Earp sisters sang “Bye Bye Bye” as “Bi Bi Bi”.

Nicole watched the group with some sort of comfort, the Widow had faded to background noise, and as she felt Waverly curl into her side, and when Wynonna or Jeremy would pull her off the couch, or the basic chit-chat with Doc. Nicole felt happy, really happy, for the first time since she visited Alice Michelle, she was happy, and she wasn't just with Waverly. She was with everyone, who she had always felt somewhat separated from, even just a little bit, but she felt like they bonded. Nicole and Wynonna had some understanding, whether or not it was from their traumas, they understood each other, they wanted to help people, but not themselves. Nicole and Doc bonded over their old-fashioned ways. Dolls knew her secret, and he helped by keeping it. And Waverly, precious Waverly, Nicole knew she could be doing better in the relationship and that it was nowhere near perfect, but they both wanted the other to be happy, and they loved each other, Nicole helped ground Waverly when she got too scared or too nervous, and Waverly made Nicole the happiest she'd been in her entire life. She was a part of something with them, and it made her feel welcome, accepted. They were her family, even if she was reluctant to admit it.

Nicole was the first to wake up, at nine in the morning. While the Revenants never slept, the Black Badge Division was taking the day off. Nicole began to cook breakfast about half an hour after she awoke, because the drive to pick up hangover cures took far too long. Once she got back Nicole lowered the temperature of the homestead knowing that everyone would have the sweats once they woke up. She also dimmed the lights.

Waverly was the next to arise, and she did not look pleased as she took a seat on one of the kitchen chairs. Despite them both being severely hung over, both of them thought the other looked gorgeous.

“Here.” Nicole handed Waverly a glass filled with blue Gatorade. “Breakfast will be ready in a little bit.”

“Thanks.” Waverly placed her glass down and walked up behind Nicole, who was paying attention to the stove. The young Earp wrapped her arms around the taller woman's waist and tiptoed to kiss the crook of her neck.

“Yeah?” The officer asked, a smile in place as she turned her head to Waverly.

“I love you.” Nicole's smile could not be stopped, neither could Waverly's slightly weaker one. Waverly damned the hangover, she wished she could just take Nicole and take care of her the way the red head was doing now.

“I love you too.” It was their first formal exchange of the phrase, but it held so much meaning than it usually did. The simple “I love you” meant the same as “I do” at a wedding. It held so much love and happiness. Nicole placed a kiss on Waverly's nose and lingered with her nose on Waverly's forehead until Doc muttered unhappily as he emerged from the living room

“I did not know that losing immortality also meant that alcohol hurts far more the next morning.” The cowboy said, taking a seat and setting his hat down low over his eyes. Nicole handed him a glass similar to Waverly. The tiny brunette took a seat.

“What the hell is this?” Nicole patted his back. 

“It helps, trust me.” 

“We used to tough it out, or drink raw eggs.” Doc mumbled before he took a sip. “This is far better.” He said as he placed the glass back on the table. 

Everyone slowly emerged due to the smell of pancakes and bacon. Nicole had served Doc and Waverly, with more whipped cream than pancake, it gave them a good laugh as it got in Doc's facial hair. Dolls eventually walked out and Nicole didn't even have time to hand the glass to him before he took it and chugged. Dolls thanked her and took his food happily. Jeremy came out, half dead, his shirt had two buttons actually done up and the did not line up at all, his hair was a similar disaster.

“All I remember is... is... who let me sing Baby Hit Me One More Time?” Jeremy asked in much confusion. 

“Just drink and eat.” Dolls pointed to the counter. 

Jeremy did so and once he sat down he tried to fix his shirt.

“Twenty bucks Wynonna is in a coma.” Dolls took a sip of his third glass of Gatorade. Jeremy took him up on it. 

“Ten she's not up before noon.” Doc countered. Nicole placed her money on the table for that one, Waverly shook her head, knowing her sister best.

“Fifty that she'll be up within half an hour and she'll do nothing but complain.” The group laughed and agreed.

Waverly was correct, Wynonna was awake no less than ten minutes later, and she was in all black, sweats, a hoodie, dark sunglasses, and ruffled hair Everyone at the table knew Wynonna Earp was not happy. When Nicole offered a glass of Gatorade, Wynonna dumped it out and filled it with whiskey. “Only way to really cure a hangover, is to never be sober.”

Jeremy winced in confusion and shook his head. “Nope... that's-um, not how it works.” Wynonna shushed him followed by a threat. 

The group had taken to watching Friends instead of being remotely productive. Dolls was the first to announce he should get back to town and at least check in. Nicole made a similar announcement shortly after, only it involved feeding CJ. Waverly reluctantly kissed Nicole goodbye with a promise to see her later.

Nicole stepped out the door to see Dolls hadn't moved. “You going to tell them?” Nicole sighed, expecting the question sooner or later. 

“I have since I met Wynonna.” Nicole spoke coolly as she walked down the steps of the homestead. “But thinking about it and actually doing it are two very different things.” Dolls nodded in some agreement as he joined her side.

“Besides, no one could ever imagine how badly Wynonna'll kick my ass.” Nicole finished as she opeed her cruiser door. 

“Take care.” Dolls told her. It implied a lot: stay safe, don't be stupid and die, make sure you're in one piece the next time I see you—it implied a lot that Nicole nor Dolls expected. 

Nicole drove back to town, the Widow in the passenger side.

“You realize at this point you're lying to yourself as well, you'll always be a Haught, you will always be part of the cult.” Nicole took a turn, a straight face while she listened to the Widow.

“Maybe. But I will never be like them, I'd never tell them where Alice Michelle is, I'd never betray Waverly or Wynonna, not like that, I'd kill each member of the cult before I let anything happen to them. I'll never be like them.” Nicole told the Widow, who completely seemed to ignore each word as she checked her nails.

“Oh, but you've already betrayed them, the lies, you are Wynonna Earp's sworn enemy.”

“I am not a Revenant, I'm not demonic. I was born in a family I'll never belong in, and I ran.” Nicole's grip tightened on the steering wheel.

“You didn't kill them, that's just as bad as being one of them.” The Widow pried

“I was fifteen!” Nicole defended strongly.

“Evil is evil, sweetcheeks. You'll burn in hell, with every Revenant, with every member of the cult, with my sisters and I, with the criminals you lock away every day. You'll burn. Maybe Waverly will meet Emily, and maybe they'll fall for each other in the afterlife, they'll forget all about you. Just like Waverly did mere months ago.” The Widow threatened and Nicole didn't notice her foot push harder into the gas pedal.

“It's not my fault I acted like a dick and hurt her. Waverly has dealt with a lot, I should have been there for her, but I couldn't because you stole my fucking face and hurt her even more.” Nicole defended, she didn't want to spiral, but it looked like that's what she was about to do. 

Nicole's phone rang and she answered once she saw it was Nedley. 

“Haught speaking.” Nicole confirmed.

“Officer Haught, I know it's your day off but, we have an active shooter inside the motel on the corner of Forbes and Alexandra. You're the best officer I have and I could use your help.”

“Do you have a spare vest?” Nicole opened her dashboard to make sure she had her gun. 

“In the trunk.”

“I'll be there in fifteen.” Nicole was probably ten minutes from Purgatory, and another ten from that side of town. Nicole sped up just a little bit more to try to cut the time in half. Nicole pulled her cruiser up a block away. 

“Haught? Where are you?” Nedley asked.

“I'm in the back alley of the hotel, they don't know I'm en route, they think it's you, Lonnie and Green. Brief me.” Nicole spoke quietly, she buttoned up her top buttons to her white dress shirt to make it look as professional as possible.

“Okay... there are two shooters, both on the second floor, they've taken hostages, there have been shots fired. They're demanding the basics, cash, a car, but they also want Wynonna.” Nedley told Nicole. The red head thought it through and began checking windows for an entrance. 

“You do realize we have to take them down and bring them back to Wynonna, don't you?” Nicole asked quickly.

“I figured.” The older man spoke roughly. Nicole finally popped a window.

“Okay, I have a way in, I'm going in, pretend the demands are on the way, send Lonnie to make it more convincing, but just get him to pick up my cruiser. It's a block and a bit away.” Nicole grunted out as she quietly snuck into the room.

“Haught are you crazy? You don't have a vest!” Nedley spoke with rising concern. 

“But I have a gun, I'm already in the building. Just keep them somewhat distracted.” Nicole spoke before she exited the room she had broken into. 

Nicole quickly rushed to the elevator and hit the up button, before she hit the second floor button and sprinted for the stairs. The elevator was on the main stretch of the hallway and the stairs were in a tiny nook at the end that only lead to the stairwell and the cleaning supply room. Nicole stayed close to the wall, ready to turn at any moment.

She listened as someone was very upset at the fact the elevator was active from a room down the hall. He left the room and made his way to the elevator with a shotgun ready. The elevator doors dinged and he swore in confusion moments before Nicole turned the corner. He readied his gun and Nicole moved so she could slam it into his torso, she hit him on the head with her pistol to get him to his knees. The officer took the Revenant's shotgun and shot him in the head with it. That would leave him immobile for a while. 

“Murphy? What's going on?” The other Revenant asked as he came out of the hotel room. He was unhappy to see Nicole and he fired two quick shots. Because he had little time to aim, the first one missed Nicole, but the other grazed her side. It burned but Nicole fired two shots of her own, into his head. 

Nicole pulled out a pocket knife and began to cut loose the civilians. Some sobbed out relieved “thank you”s others pointed out the blood soaking through her shirt, but she couldn't care less as she made her way to an injured civilian, one shot to the leg, the other to the right shoulder area. Nicole tore apart the closet to grab towels and used them to apply pressure to the wounds. Shortly after she listened as Nedley and Green charged in.

“Green, take over until the paramedics arrive.” Nicole ordered. She stood and walked over to Nedley who was glaring at her wound, which was bleeding a lot. 

“I told you so-”

“I'm fine, I'm going to bring those guys to Wynonna so she can deal with them properly.” Nicole told Nedley. 

It took many minutes—with the poor assistance of Lonnie— to get the Revenants to her cruiser. Once Lonnie was back in the building, Nicole shot each Revenant again to ensure they didn't wake up. 

She drove back to the homestead and felt significantly worse the entire drive. She took a moment as one of the Revenant's began to stir so she could shoot them each again, and she checked her wound. It was deeper than she originally thought but it was still barely a gash, she had been in worse situations after all.

Nicole parked her cruiser just outside the homestead boundary line and pulled the Revenants out of the cruiser and onto the gravel. The officer pulled out her phone and called Wynonna. 

“Yo?” The Earp said, clearly over the hangover or just drunk again.

“Come out past the boundary line, I have a present for you.” Nicole spoke kindly. Less than a minute later, Wynonna marched out, her gun in her boot, and Waverly was in tow, curled up in a cardigan.

“Surprise.” Nicole told the Earps before she stepped aside. 

“How'd you take down two Revs?” Wynonna asked quickly. Nicole explained and Waverly finally got close enough to see the blood soaking through Nicole's white shirt. 

“Oh my god, baby.” Waverly rushed forward as Wynonna shot the Revs in the background. Waverly's hands were at the hem of Nicole's shirt and she was about to check the wound, but Nicole placed her hands on her girlfriend's. “What the hell did you do!?” Waverly said, absolutely terrified by the fact that the lower right side of Nicole's shirt was now dark red.

“I went in without a vest, one of them got me.” Nicole motioned to the Revenant named Murphy. Wynonna marched forward. Murphy had begun to stir awake, and Wynonna placed her foot on his throat and pressed down hard.

“Stay the fuck away from my family.” Wynonna growled. Nicole caught Wynonna's slip, but it made her smile none the less. 

“I'm fine Waves, I promise.”

“You promised no more dying. Going in with no vest was reckless, you know how much bulletproof vests matter in our relationship!” Waverly paused and took a deep breath at Nicole's guilty expression.   
“At least let me look.” Nicole was still reluctant. “Please.” Waverly finished, Nicole broke and lowered her hands. 

The gash even rendered a “holy shit” from Wynonna. 

“You need to let Waves stitch that up.” The eldest Earp insisted. Nicole had no time to refuse before the Earp sisters were pushing her into the house.

“Why didn't you go to the hospital?” Waverly asked as she dabbed the blood covered stomach. Nicole's hand instantly gripped around Waverly's wrist and the young Earp didn't realize that would be the officer's reaction. Nicole didn't even know why she reacted that way.

“No more hospitals, please.” Nicole pleaded. Waverly nodded in understanding, Waverly gently rubbed Nicole's forearm that was still gripping Waverly's. Nicole loosed her grip and relaxed. “I'm going to do this, you're not going to the hospital. I'm here.” Waverly continued to soothe her girlfriend until the red head relaxed.

“Think about a Netflix show you wanna watch or something while I do this.” Waverly suggested as she took a shaky hand and the needle. It was Nicole's turn to soothe her girlfriend. 

“You'll do great, it's not your first rodeo. And what's another scar, right?” Nicole insisted, love in her eyes, Waverly nodded sternly and began. It hurt more than Nicole remembered, probably because there was no anesthetic to numb the area. 

Wynonna walked in with a shot glass with bourbon on rocks. “Drink it, it's distracting.” Wynonna patted Nicole on the back, careful not to move her before she went back to her room.

After Waverly placed a bandage over the wound, she apologized profusely. Nicole shrugged in acceptance.

“Like I said, what's another scar. Not to mention I seem to remember a girl I met a while ago said something along the lines of 'chicks dig scars' I stand by that.” Nicole pulled Waverly close and kissed her gently. 

They curled into each other and began to watch One Day At A Time on Netflix, they needed a good laugh and a good cry as well. They spent the rest of the day just watching the TV show. 

“I should get going.” Nicole said sadly after they had been cuddling for a while. 

“You could just stay the night.” Nicole shook her head. 

“No, I never did make it home so Calamity Jane probably thinks I've abandoned her or left her to starve.” Nicole smiled sadly and placed a kiss on Waverly's forehead. 

“Have a good night, get some sleep.” Nicole encouraged before she left for her own home.

She walked in and the first thing she noticed was that she didn't watch her fight against the Widow again, she opened the door, the Widow charged her and then disappeared. The Widow wasn't whispering in her ear anymore, and hadn't been since the shooting.

Nicole filled Calamity Jane's dish and she made her way to the couch before she traded her loaned shirt from Wynonna for her police academy baseball tee. 

Nicole was on her couch with CJ curled up on her chest, her tail gently swept over the wound. Nicole's rather peaceful day was ruined with the back door being kicked in.

“What the fuck!?” Nicole yelled, before she saw the cloaks and heard Latin chants. Calamity Jane ran off to hide before Nicole's iris' turned completely red. 

“Why do you return so soon?” Bulshar asked coldly, once again Nicole's voice was replaced with that of a demon's.

“I was thinking about last night.” Nicholas took down his hood. “And I thought we should act sooner rather than later. We need to talk strategy, my Lord. We need to take action.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope it was okay, I'm going to try to stay a chapter ahead now so I hope posting will be more regular. Let me know how you liked it, or why you didn't, feedback is appreciated always.


	15. What She Wanted to Hear

“Why such urgency?” Nicole asked as she pulled off the baseball tee. She saw the wound and held her hand over it momentarily, causing the wound to nearly completely heal. Nicole pulled out the stitches before she took the clothing provided by Nicholas. Nicole slipped on the black cloak, with a blood red V from the neck to the bottom of the cloak. There were jewels embedded in the wide cuffs of the sleeves, at the hem of the bottom of the cloak, the neck was embedded as well, a large red diamond in the center of the chest. Nicole looked at the hood's hem with slight amusement at the spikes that came out of the hood's hem, the fact the spikes matched those on the cloaks belt. On the belt, there were spikes and a matching red diamond to connect the belt. 

“I'm glad you've finally brought me my rightful attire.” Bulshar spoke approvingly. “I still do not know why, and you better hope you're not wasting my time.” Bulshar's tone turned cold very quickly.

“I need to discuss some things with you, and I've learned that Nicole's home is clearly not the smartest place to discuss delicate information, or for you to be awaken.” 

“I see your point, and I agree, but we spoke days ago, why have you returned? That is my question. And I suggest you answer me, Nicholas, before I tear out your intestines in the worst imaginable way.”

“Yes, sir, of course. Nicole's friends are weary of her condition ever since the Widow attack. They will begin to get suspicious if Nicole is acting odd for a certain period of time. And I'm sure eventually Nicole will begin to realize she's not hallucinating her encounters with us, or that her loss of time is a mistake. We need to move quickly so you can officially take over Nicole's body until yours is healed and recovered.” Nicholas answered as they walked through the forest and into what was seemingly a bear cave. Another cult member, who remained hooded moved the boulder for the two leaders.

The staircase down to where the cult members resided was lit by torches and the actual cave was lit by many oil lamps. And few torches. 

“Follow me, I insist.” Nicholas lead Bulshar slightly further down the staircase to a wooden door. Nicholas unlocked the door and opened it for the powerful thing that possessed his daughter. Inside the room was a large but simple wooden table and a chair on each side, except the chair at the head of the table was a throne of bones with red velvet to cushion it.

“Now we have some privacy.” Nicholas spoke as he took a seat at the foot of the table, so he could face his Lord in their rightful place. 

“Alright, now speak.” Bulshar ordered, Nicole's face could not be seen due to the hood being drawn but Nicholas could feel the burning judgment from his seat across the table. 

“As I said, we need to take action, we have no clue what we need for the ritual to summon your body, nor do we know how to assist your possession to make it... permanent.” Nicholas had to search for the word. 

“We know we need the blood of an Earp, pure blood preferably, and Nicole does know where the child is, but she is protecting the information without even realizing it. For recovering my rightful vessel, the child is needed as well as Wynonna's gun. Preferably having the heir shoot the child, but melting the gun down to a blade and my killing the child will suffice.” Bulshar spoke. “All of the child's blood must be spilled inside of my tomb, and then, Nicole needs to die so I can be released from this vessel.” Bulshar looked at Nicholas. “That will be your job. Can you kill your own daughter?” Bulshar took down the hood so Nicholas could look at Nicole's face. 

“My Lord, had we not needed her for you to awaken, I would have killed her eleven years ago.” Bulshar nodded in approval. 

“As for my possession of Nicole, I am weak, and every time you awaken me, I have to waste my energy to take control. So the first step would mean leave me to rest. Continued control would be helped if Nicole did something she found unbearable. For instance, if she hurt her little play thing, that Earp girl, Waverly.” Bulshar explained. 

“Wait, why can you not use her for the sacrifice?” Nicholas asked, Waverly was much more obtainable and it only seemed logical to Nicholas.

“She is not the daughter of Ward Earp, so she does not have that bastard Wyatt's blood running through her veins. Actually she is the only thing that could put a nail in our plan.” Nicole took a moment before they decided to move on.

“Separating her from the Earps and those three men would help too, I'd recommend leaving a clue about her connection to the cult somewhere quite obvious, somewhere the heir would find it.” Nicholas took note, her home wouldn't work, maybe her desk at the station.

“I need her secluded, alone, sad, hurt, I need her to hurt those she cares about. I need her to be... weak.” Bulshar reveled at the word. 

“Make sure the Earps don't trust her, and work on getting Earp's gun. In the meantime have the others clear as much of my tomb as possible. Make it easier for us. That is what you can do, Nicholas. Now, I need to return to Nicole's home, before she regains control.” Nicholas nodded in understanding.

“We will not bother you again, Lord Bulshar.”

* * *

Nicole woke up back on her couch, she came to terms with the fact that the Bulshar cult attack was a horrible nightmare. 

“You know what would stop nightmares? A bullet in your brain.” The Widow spoke from the other side of the couch.

“You're still here? I thought this was over.” Nicole groaned.

“Of course I'm still here, you can't run away from your own mind.” The Widow told Nicole without hesitation. 

“Touché.” Nicole replied as she sat up. She bickered with her imagination the entirety of her morning as she prepared for work. Nicole spotted her grazed stomach was nearly healed and the stitches were gone, it didn't concern her, she healed quickly and the stitches must have come out while she slept. By seven, Nicole was at the station and ready to go, she wanted a case, any case, just something to do to distract her from the Widow bitch.

Nedley didn't have much but he gave her his word she'd be put on the first case they had. She passed Wynonna and Waverly on her way out to parole. She waved to Wynonna and Waverly gave her a quick kiss goodbye.

Nicole immediately responded when dispatch contacted the radio and notified officers there was a robbery at a store merely two blocks away. The officer arrived and snuck around to the back door and picked the lock, she knew it was risky to act before backup arrived but there were civilians inside.

Nicole kicked open the storage room door to the main store and aimed her gun at the robber.

“Hands in the air!” She ordered, the man was wearing a black ski mask and a dark grey sweater, with black sweat pants. He made a run for it and Nicole followed suit. It was in chases like this where she prided herself on pushing herself in the academy. 

He made way for the alley and slipped a little bit on the dead turn, it gave Nicole a little time to catch up. He only made it a few more meters before Nicole managed to take a couple long strides and leap for him. She brought him to the ground and they both splashed into a puddle but he continued to fight back. He took a swing for her face and she had to pull back from the force. He scrambled for his feet to run again but Nicole wrapped both her arms around his ankle and pulled it to her chest, causing him to fall flat and for the back of his foot to collide with Nicole's jaw. The officer pulled her way forward and finally cuffed him, she followed by ripping off his ski mask to reveal a teenager. By the time she got him back to the scene, other officers were making sure the civilians were alright.

“You've sure gotten hurt a lot since you've been back.” Nedley observed. Nicole shrugged as she shoved the kid into the back of Nedley's cruiser.

“I've been a little reckless, so what? I haven't lost a perp and I haven't let any civilians get hurt. That's what matters.” 

“Not only do I not agree with you, I think Waverly would take my side on this too.” Nedley looked at Nicole's injury, her bottom lip was split from the kid's foot. 

“You're biased. The safety of the people is more important than how I look.” Nicole argued.

“Just keep in mind that if you get yourself killed on the job, the people won't be half as safe. Not to mention the world will have lost a really good person.” Nedley finished, he got in his cruiser and gave Nicole no time to argue.

Nicole got back to the station and did paperwork for the next hour, for the case, and to find out who the kid was and who he lived with. It turned out he was a foster kid new to the area. The foster parents were sorry and extremely horrified at the thought that the kid—Hal O'Brian— could have been hurt. Nicole asked if she could talk to him. And she was given permission.

“Hey kid.” Nicole took a seat down across from him at the interrogation table. “I don't wanna arrest you, I felt guilty as soon as I saw you were just a teenager.”

“Then why am I still here?” Hal mumbled defensively.

“Because what you did is serious, and I doubt that everything will be fine if I just let you go.” Nicole explained. “You ever play poker?”

“Strip, yeah. Why would that matter?” The boy admitted.

“You've been dealt a rough hand, Hal. I look at it and I see one similar to the one I was given. Parents kicked you out, your uncle passed away after he took you in, you tried to live on your own but the cops found out and put you in the system.” 

“You're a cop, what could you have done to get kicked out?” 

“I didn't want to go into the family business, and when they found out I was gay, I either had to leave or I wouldn't be alive today.” Nicole told him truthfully. The kid tensed, and she knew that it was the same case for him. 

“People will accept you, and the people outside that door are worried for you, they were terrified when they thought I may have hurt you. They care Hal, you'll find people who care.” Nicole took a deep breath. “I may have been dealt a shit hand, but I drew a pair of Kings, and I have a great life, I help people, and you can do the same, you can draw a pair of Aces, but you have to help yourself first.” Nicole gave him her card. 

“If you ever need anything, help, or just someone to listen, all you have to do is call.” She placed a hand on his shoulder to comfort him. She walked over to his side of the table as he shook violently. She opened her arms slightly and he threw himself at her, tears pouring freely. He clawed at her back tensely as she held him tight. 

“Why don't they love me?” He sobbed and Nicole held him tighter. 

“They do, of course they do, they just can't understand that who you love isn't a choice. And there are people who do love you, for everything you are. They do. I promise you.” Nicole choked on her words, wishing that someone had been there to say it to her. “You're going to do something great, this is just a bump in the road. I promise you.” 

He spat out “I'm sorry” while he cried and Nicole just held him and tried to soothe until he was ready to leave. 

Nicole and Nedley watched as Hal and his foster parents left the station. 

“See, not everyone could have connected to him like that, Haught. You may have turned his life around today.” Nedley patted her on the back. 

Waverly came out of the Black Badge Division and intently listened to Nicole explain. 

Soon Dolls and Wynonna wanted to hear the story as well and everyone was there later than expected, they were the last ones in the building.

“Hey, you wanna come over and have take out or something?” Nicole offered. Waverly smiled happily. 

“Okay, just let me get changed, I need out of these soaked clothes.” Nicole left to the station bathroom. 

“Wynonna, Dolls, I'm going to go with Nicole so head out whenever.” The tiny brunette. 

“Don't break the bed.” Wynonna teased gently. Waverly shook her head. 

“Neither of us are there yet.” The tiny Earp answered. Nicole entered the BBD room in a simple tee and jeans. 

Hey I can't find my phone, did I leave it in here?” Nicole asked. Dolls and Nicole searched the many tables and chairs, and Wynonna offered to check Nicole's desk.

Wynonna looked through the drawers and found nothing, when the heir lifted a file, she found Nicole's phone. 

When Wynonna put the file back down, she read the front. It was a Black Badge file, a Black Badge file for the Bulshar cult, Wynonna didn't know one existed, and there was no reason for Nicole of all people to have it. 

Wynonna opened the file.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope it was enjoyable. there will be more to come, but we are reaching the finale of our story.


	16. Never The Right Time.

Nicole, Waverly and Dolls came out of the BBD office and saw that Wynonna was holding Nicole's phone.  
“Oh, you found it, thanks Wyn-” The officer looked at the file in Wynonna's hand that the heir was reading. 

“What the fuck is this?” Wynonna walked forward. She slammed the file on a nearby desk and Dolls and Nicole caught a glimpse of the family tree, and they immediately knew what it was. “What the fuck is going on!?” Wynonna yelled. The Widow howled with laughter from Nicole's side.

"Finally some drama to spice things up!" The Widow taunted.

“I thought that was locked in your desk.” Nicole questioned Dolls. 

“I swear, it was.” Dolls answered quickly. 

“You knew!? You knew and didn't tell me!?” Wynonna yelled at Dolls now. 

“What the hell is going on?” Waverly asked. Wynonna placed both her hands on Nicole's shirt collar.

“Your girlfriend is a traitor! That's what!” Wynonna growled. Waverly walked over to the file and looked at it. 

“What?” Waverly's eyebrows furrowed and she looked over the file in horror. She looked at Nicole with a broken heart.

“I can explain.” Nicole spoke weakly. Wynonna let go and held her hands in the air surrender style.

“Ohhh, you can explain, my apologies.” Wynonna swung and plowed into Nicole's nose, much to the horror of Waverly and Dolls.

“I trusted you!” Wynonna stepped back and kicked the officer square in the chest, Nicole fell back forcefully and the red head crashed into a desk. Nicole hit the ground and Wynonna climbed on top of her, to continue hit after hit. 

“I trusted you with my daughter! I thought you were actually good enough for my sister! But you're just a piece of shit like everyone else in this shit-hole!” Wynonna yelled as she pummelled Nicole. The officer didn't fight back, because Wynonna was right, and Nicole deserved every hit. Wynonna continued to beat Nicole senseless abut she didn't fight back, Wynonna would do whatever she would do and Nicole just accepted that. Besides, this wasn't half as bad as interrogation training at age eleven. Waverly was yelling at Wynonna to stop, absolutely horrified by the amount of blood. 

“She can't explain if you kill her! Wynonna please! WYNONNA!” Waverly begged. Dolls finally found an opening and tore the Earp heir off of Nicole. Wynonna punched him for it, but he didn't let her go back to beating Nicole. Waverly wanted to go to the woman but she couldn't grip all of the information thrown her way. 

The red head couldn't see out of one eye and her entire face was sore, she turned to the side and spat out blood and a tooth, luckily it was a back molar so it wouldn't be too noticeable, but the swelling and the broken nose would be. Dolls pushed Wynonna back from Nicole to put some extra distance. 

“Let her talk.” He insisted. “Then wait to beat her up more.” Dolls insisted. 

Waverly Wynonna and Dolls sat at the BBD table as Nicole explained, sometimes she needed Dolls to translate due to her speech being slightly muffled. She told them what she told Dolls, that she was Bulshar's Throne and that she couldn't have a child or Bulshar would one day use it as his vessel. She told them about her arranged marriage to Ewan, and how she ran away at the age of fifteen because she never could stand for their cause. The weakened officer even talked about Emily's death and how she worked her ass off to become an officer so she could come back to Purgatory and put an end to her family's plan, and to the cult all together. She talked about how she heard about Waverly and how winning to affections of the young Earp became her only goal and that the cult had been forgotten until Wynonna had to deal with the Widows and Ewan. 

“How can we believe anything you say, ever again?” Wynonna accused angrily. 

“Because I'd rather die than join their cause, I felt that way when I was twelve and ever since I met you guys, it's even more so my viewpoint.” Nicole rubbed her face gently.

“You said that you're Bulshar's vessel, how do we know you're you, and we're not dealing with another fucking possession?” Nicole rasped out how it had to happen a certain way, and it would take a great trauma, and Bulshar wouldn't have let Wynonna beat him up, or would he explain the secret plan to such “mundane” people. 

“I was going to let you take Alice Michelle out of town, and then I let you go visit her on my behalf. You let me let a member of the Bulshar cult visit my daughter, who I am trying to keep safe from the same fucking cult! how do you know you weren't followed? How do I know that you haven't told them?”Nicole swallowed down the rage.

“Don't call me that, I haven't been a member of the cult officially for eleven years, and before that I never agreed with them.” Nicole told boldly. “The fact I'm still tied to them is horrid, and I know that. But it changes nothing, nor is it the reason I first visited Waverly that day in Shorty's.” Nicole licked her freshly opened wound as a reminder that talking isn't a smart thing to do after you have your lip split open and have your tooth knocked out.

“The only thing it changes,” Nicole started, “-is that I want in when you go to take down the Bulshar cult, and I get to put the bullet between Nicholas Haught's eyes.” Wynonna's jaw clenched and she pretended to nod in acceptance as she turned around, and Nicole took a deep breath from utter exhaustion and relief that for now it was over. Nicole believed she was fine for about a tenth of a second before Wynonna turned around and nailed Nicole in the nose. It gushed like a geyser once again, defining a new break. 

“Wynonna!” Dolls yelled. “If you're going to kill her, just do it, calm down.”

“Get out...” Waverly had been staring at the floor since she read the file, and even scarier she hadn't uttered a word. “I said get out! Both of you leave! It's my turn.” Waverly looked at Nicole, but not really, not in the eye. She looked at Nicole like a ghost. 

“But-” 

“Go.” Waverly's tone was one that could kill, something different than ever heard from the petite girl. Dolls pulled out the Earp heir from the room. There was silence and Waverly stared at the floor.

“You _promised_ , no more lies.” Waverly's voice was eerily calm, but the way she uttered the word “promise” showed how truly furious she was.

“You're right, I did, and I know that this was not okay, and I should have told you, I-”

“I was there, I've been here all this time. And you didn't say a word.” The Earp's eyes met Nicole's own, and the red head wanted to kill herself because of how much she hurt the young Earp. Waverly's tone went from angry yet calm to heartbroken and everything sad very, very quickly.

“I know...” Nicole muttered weakly. Inside, Bulshar woke up, Nicole's spirit breaking enough for him to begin to break through.

“No! You clearly don't, I love you Nicole, and I feel like you're just throwing this away again and again! Why didn't you tell me?”

“I met you and I was happy, my family was in the past, I didn't even realize that Wynonna and the Bulshar cult had started butting heads until a few days before the Widow came, and after that, I couldn't find the right time.”

“There was never going to be a right time, Nicole! I understood with Shae, the relationship was new, and then you were shot and I got possessed, and then Wynonna, and it was just one shit situation after another,” Waverly stood in the middle of her defence, waving fingers and pacing angrily, “-and I knew you were waiting for the fire to die down, but this? This is a whole new level of betrayal. You didn't just hurt me, you hurt my sister. And that's not so easy to fix, Wynonna and I come before everything, we worked hard to get where we are. _You_ worked hard to get your friendship with her to where it was, and now, you left town to see my niece and didn't even tell me, and you are related to people in the very cult that we are trying to take down! How am I supposed to react to that?” Waverly bit her bottom lip to hold back a sob as she looked through Nicole brokenheartedly. 

“We were making progress, slowly but surely we were getting back to normal. How are we ever supposed to get back to where we were two days ago, let alone then?” Waverly shrugged weakly to try to emphasize her point but she already killed Nicole with her words. Wynonna's hits seemed like nothing to this, Waverly's words hurt much more and Nicole knew she deserved each and every thing Waverly said. 

“I don't expect you to forgive me, I don't deserve it.” Nicole whispered weakly, placing a hand on her ribs. “I feel horrible and I'm never going to forgive myself for it either.”

“Don't call, don't text, don't come to the homestead, don't talk to me if we see each other in the station or around town. Wait for me to make contact, and I hope you realize I may never make that contact.” Waverly paused, and Nicole knew what she was going to say, she looked Waverly in the eyes for the fatal hit. 

“You broke my heart.” Waverly barely managed the strength to look Nicole in the eye and say it, and the young Earp tore away. Bulshar was getting a high off of Nicole's heartache. “You should go.” Waverly's voice was deep and throaty and it was still evident that, despite no tears falling from her watery eyes, that it was difficult. Nicole stood and hobbled out of the BBD office, and it was clear Wynonna had been giving Dolls shit while Waverly tore her apart.

Nicole didn't look at them, and she just wandered out of the station, forgetting her phone all together, the thing that caused the end of her world, she forgot her phone, and she didn't even care how the file wound up on her desk. The officer just dragged herself to her cruiser, and then to her house. Nicole pulled out her phone and gave Doc a call, because he wasn't in the dog house. 

“Hello?” Doc's voice was weak and tired. “Officer Haught?”

“Hi, sorry to call you so late, um you're going to find out a few things tomorrow about me that you won't like, but I won't be around for a while, and I just need to make sure someone knows... I'm sorry, no matter what happens, I am. Just take care of Wynonna and Waverly.” Nicole's voice was weak as well.

“Is everything alright? Are you planning on hurting yourself?” He asked, clearly concerned.

“No, for both questions. Have a good night Doc, keep 'em safe.” Nicole hung up.

* * *

Dolls stayed at the station and cleaned the blood when Waverly and Wynonna went back home, to deal with this together, to cope. Wynonna and Waverly arrived at the homestead just for Waverly to charge out of the car, headed angrily to the house while she bundled up in her cardigan. Wynonna turned of the car and chased after her.

“Waverly? Waves wait! Shouldn't we talk about this?” Wynonna called out.

“I don't wanna talk.” Waverly answered before she marched inside. 

“Waverly, your girlfriend is a member of the cult, you're allowed to be upset.” Wynonna insisted, and Waverly stopped and turned slightly. “We should talk about this.”

“What's there to talk about? That Nicole's a lying jackass? That I'm heartbroken? There, we talked, happy?” Waverly choked out the words before she climbed up the stairs and Wynonna didn't follow, because she didn't know how to help the younger woman.

“For fucks sake.” Wynonna slammed her hand on the wall in anger, angry at herself for not knowing what to do and for trusting Nicole, angry at Nicole for the lies, and for breaking Waverly's heart. “You bitch, you fucking bitch...” Wynonna was hurt and she couldn't believe that Nicole would keep something like that from everyone including Waverly, and she couldn't believe the righteous lawman Dolls would keep that secret for her.

Wynonna opened a brand new scotch bottle and chugged until her phone rang. Of all people it was Doc.

“Not now, Doc.” Wynonna muttered tiredly.

“Nicole just called me and sounded very strange, said she wouldn't be around. What is going on?” Doc asked.

“Come over tomorrow morning, I'll tell you, basically Dolls is in the doghouse and Nicole might as well be a Revenant. Go back to sleep. Talk to you tomorrow.” Wynonna hung up before Doc could continue asking questions. The eldest Earp drank too much before she passed out on the couch.

The following morning, Wynonna actually got up before noon, before nine. So she decided to help Waverly the way Waverly had been helping her, with food and silent emotional support. Wynonna cooked breakfast and even put it on a TV tray. 

Wynonna knocked on Waverly's door, tray in hand. “Baby girl there's breakfast.” 

“Not hungry.”

“You gotta come out sooner or later.” Wynonna pleaded, she didn't want to open the door without permission, but would if she had to.

“Go away.” 

“I could bring it on a tray,” Wynonna offered, as she stared at the tray in her hand.

“I said fuck off, Wynonna.” The older Earp bit her lip and nodded slowly, and opened the door. Wynonna placed the tray on the dresser and looked at her sister, who was curled up in a few few blankets and held onto a fluffy pillow, the side of her head buried into another one. Waverly stared at the wall, face emotionless.

“I'm not the bad guy here. Here's the food if you change your mind,” Wynonna left without another word. 

Not much time had passed when Doc knocked at the door.  
“Do care to tell.”

Wynonna told Doc what Nicole told them the night before, throwing in “can you believe her!?” and “that fucking bitch” where she chose.

“Not only was this bitch married, she is related to the leaders of the Bulshar cult, the people we're protecting Alice-Michelle from, and if Bulshar woke up, we'd have to fight Nicole, how couldn't she tell us this?”

“That's... not good. But I highly doubt that Officer Haught would allow the cult to hurt our child, or Waverly.”

“I don't know what to doubt or not anymore, Doc. A day ago if you asked me if I thought Nicole would ever do anything to ever hurt Waverly, I'd laugh and say she'd get herself killed before she hurt Waves. Now? She won't come out of her room, she looks like she's a vegetable, she's being rude to me too, which I deserve, but still, Waverly's the sweet one!” Wynonna hissed out quietly.

“I think she needs time, Wynonna.” Doc tried. “When she's ready, you need to be there, but you can't do anything until that time comes.”

“How are you so calm about this?” Wynonna asked weakly. “Am I overreacting?” Wynonna was confused and scared that she was impulsive and beat the shit out of Nicole prematurely. 

“No, you're dealing with the betrayal of a friend, you and Waverly are much closer to this than I am.” Doc admitted. “Not to mention I watched the majority of people that Wyatt put down. They weren't all evil, but some were worse than you or I could imagine. I don't believe Nicole's insidious, but she hurt you, and you both need to recover.” Doc picked up his hat from the table and placed it on his head firmly. “And I'll leave you both to do just that.” Doc laid a gentle kiss on Wynonna's forehead with a smile, before the man left all together. 

* * *

Nicole hadn't moved from her kitchen counter since she got home the night before. The Widow was more prominent than ever, yelling in Nicole's ear harshly. 

“Why are you just sitting there!” The Widow screeched in frustration. “Grab your gun, shoot yourself, or them! Look at yourself, you know you deserve to die, you didn't fight back, you didn't even try, you wanna die! So why don't you do it already!?” The Widow encouraged. Nicole took the empty glass in her hand and threw it at the Widow angrily. The glass went right through the woman and smashed against the wall. 

“You know what?” Nicole took the revolver she kept in her sock and emptied all the bullets but one and spun the barrel. “Just to shut you up, I'll try, three shots, if it's not in the first four, then lay the fuck off, if it does then I'll join you in hell just like you've told me for the past eon! Deal?” Nicole looked delusional, which she was but it really showed in her eyes, she had nothing to ground her anymore, she lost everything.

“Four shots.”

Nicole held the revolver up to her temple, she pulled the trigger and it was followed by a _click_. She did the same thing twice more with a straight face. She pulled the trigger one last time.

“Goddamn it.” The Widow and Nicole said in unison. Nicole reloaded the gun, and saw that if she had pulled the trigger one more time, her brains would have painted the wall. After she reloaded it, she placed it back in her sock. The Widow began to talk again as Nicole went to grab a new glass and a new bottle of tequila. 

“I mean, why are you even staying? The Earps hate you, your family wants to possess you with the most incredible being in the universe, but for some reason you have an issue with that option too, you have a good record and could get hired anywhere else, so why are you still in Purgatory?” The Widow questioned.

Nicole pointed the bottle at the Widow. “That is the first not awful thing you've said to me.” Nicole was distracted by a knock at the door and poured a little too close to the rim of the glass. “Yep.” Nicole answered and Doc opened the door.

“I come in peace, and with a gift.” He held up a bottle of what looked like Everclear, much better than tequila. Nicole chugged the liquid despite how much it burned her lip and gum.

“Why aren't you going to kick my ass?” Nicole scratched out.

“Well, I thought about it, I'm not thrilled that you're related to the very organization that is trying to kidnap my daughter, but I don't think you're on their side.” Doc spoke wisely, placing his own glass on the table before he poured them each a glass full of the strong liquid. 

“You're right.” Nicole admitted. “But I still fucked up, they still don't trust me.” 

“Wynonna and I are still grieving Nicole, and Waverly is hurt that you didn't tell her, it'll take time. It's like water getting caught in a dam, it's been building up and this was just the breaking point for them.” 

“Why not you?” Nicole asked as she choked down the burning liquid.

“Because you remind me of myself when I was riding with Wyatt.” Doc admitted. “You just wanted to do the right thing, but you wanted to save yourself in the process. I made a deal with the devil, and you kept your secret.” Nicole nodded sadly in acceptance. 

“Wyatt hated me after I was cured, he came back expecting to find my dead body, just to see me with two women on my arm. And right now, they're angry with you, because they're so close to you and because they care.”

“I don't think that's the case anymore.” Nicole replied lowly, sadly. 

“You're wrong” Doc spoke up. “It'll just take time, for them to accept this and for you to make it up to them.” Nicole nodded knowingly.

“When did you get so wise?” Nicole asked, before she took another drink. 

“I have a daughter, who knows what I'll have to tell her or what advice I'll have to give.” 

They continued to drink in silence and eventually Doc left. Nicole stared at a photo she had left on the living room table, it was a group photo from the bonfire. She grabbed it and labelled everyone. Mama, Papa, Auntie Waverly, Uncle Dolls, Uncle Jeremy, Nicole. On the back she wrote a simple note, “we can't wait until you're the one lighting the fire, we love you, and we'll bring you home soon.” 

Nicole grabbed her keys and left, a woman on a mission.

* * *

Wynonna had sat on the couch since Doc had left, waiting for Waverly to want help, she'd declined all of Dolls' phone calls and was alone with her thoughts, Wynonna did not enjoy that at all. Her thought process spiralled from hating Nicole to thinking her lack of trust would lead to her dying alone very quickly.

In her room, Waverly had not touched the food yet, and it was going on four, but she did move to a sitting position. She looked at the DNA results, another lie. She looked at the emails she and Shae shared to keep track of how Nicole was, the wife, another lie. She looked at pictures of her and Nicole, there weren't many on her phone, let alone hard photos, but there were some, and she used to love each of them. Now she looked at them with rage, her and Nicole, Nicole was a lie. Waverly pinned up the photos on the wall, her jaw clenched.

Wynonna sprinted up the stairs at the sound of a shotgun firing. The brunette ran in to see Waverly on her knees, shotgun scattered aside, and Waverly held some remains of the photos in her hands. Wynonna shook her head and came over to Waverly, she took her place next to her sister and held Waverly as she began to sob.

Waverly began to calm down after what seemed like hours. 

“You wanna talk?” Wynonna asked. Waverly had taken back to staring at the ground.

“I want to hate her, she lied to us, I should hate her, but I don't hate her... why don't I hate her?” Waverly was still shaking, and on the verge of tears again, but she was able to speak now.

“You won't like the answer.” Wynonna answered sadly, Waverly knew it in her gut but she needed to hear it out loud. “It's because you still love her, and you're allowed to still love her, and you're allowed to be angry too.” Wynonna encouraged.

“But she-” Wynonna hushed her sister. 

“I know. And I know that asshole is going to beat herself up enough for the both of us.” 

“But a couple shouldn't lie and keep secrets.” Waverly argued sadly.

“Yeah, I know, but they do, and that is something you and Nicole will have to work on, but you'll fix it, because she loves you too. So much.”

“What if it's not even worth it?” Waverly asked, her voice crushed. 

“You'll know if it is.” Wynonna encouraged. 

“How?”

“The look in her eyes when she sees you, the look you give her, the way you'll fall back together again, eventually and the little things they do and remember. It's really the feeling you get, when you realize you can't deal with losing them, the panic, the feeling of emptiness and pain,” Wynonna had started off bullshitting, but soon the advice became real. “That's how you know.”

“Do you feel that way with Doc or Dolls?” The younger girl asked.

“With both of them.”

“Love sucks donkey balls...” Waverly mumbled and Wynonna chuckled sadly before she agreed totally. 

“Especially when everyone we fall in love with can be total assholes sometimes.” They sat there, Waverly curled up with her head on Wynonna's lap, and Wynonna running her hand through Waverly's hair comfortingly. They found refuge in each other. 

All Waverly ever wanted was for something—or everything— to be easy, but it was just a tumbleweed that took each of them down over and over again. The Earps were getting sick of it.

* * *

Bulshar was breaking out, it was slow but sure and he revelled in the fact that by the next day he'd be able to take over Nicole's body, as long as he wanted.

The officer ensured she wasn't being followed as she drove down the highway, it was a long drive but the way she was speeding would likely cut the time in half. 

While she had left mid afternoon, her arrival was at dawn. Nicole got out of the old jeep and looked at the envelope in her hands and smiled at what was on the envelope:“For Alice, to teach her”. Nicole climbed up the steps and opened the mail slot, just to come face to fact with the end of a gun.

“I will shoot.” Gus spoke coldly. 

“You should.” Nicole agreed, and Bulshar broke out a little bit more. 

“You had to have known Wynonna would call me and warn us.” Nicole sighed.

“Yeah I hoped so, there's a letter in here explaining in case she hadn't.” Nicole paused. “I don't want to hurt Alice Michelle, I couldn't if I tried, I just wanted to drop of a final thing, a photo, to teach her where she comes from, who's waiting for her back home. To see her mom and dad.” Nicole finally admitted, she held up the envelope, and Gus lowered the gun. 

“I'm sorry Ms. McCready, I never wanted to hurt them.” Nicole took a shaky breath and ran off before she began to tear up. She knew she could never be a part of that kid's life, and she knew she couldn't raise one of her own, and she wanted Alice to be happy and back in Wynonna's arms.

The drive back was slower, but not much, Nicole was still easily twenty over the speed limit, and she made it home just after nine. The officer looked around the house sadly. It seemed so cold, all it was now was a crash pad and a bar, Nicole didn't feel at home here for a long time, and now it was even more so. 

Nicole was torn from her thoughts by her cat, who meowed and rubbed against Nicole's leg. “Wanna take a road trip?” Nicole asked Calamity Jane. 

Nicole grabbed some stuff from the bathroom and laid it on the couch, before she looked at her room, her guilt overcame the fear and she opened the door to her bedroom, it was cold and dreary, but Nicole couldn't have cared less. The red head opened up the closet door and her breath caught in her throat as she saw herself at the bottom, faceless, weak, half dead. 

“I should have died in here, would have made shit a lot easier.” At this point Bulshar was bubbling at the surface, waiting for the pen to drop so he could take over. Nicole grabbed a small black suitcase that was behind the hallucination before she tore a jacket from the hanger. The officer went to her dresser and grabbed as many shirts and as many jeans that would fit in the suitcase. She left her room and threw the things she got from the bathroom in the suitcase as well. 

Nicole had begun to zip up the suitcase when she looked at her favourite picture of her and Waverly and picked it up sadly. “I'm so sorry.” Nicole tore the picture in two, she placed the half that contained Waverly in the suitcase, before she tore up and stomped on the photo that contained herself. 

Nicole was fine, except for the fact that her veins were bursting under her skin, causing them to pop out. 

“What's going on?” Nicole looked at her arms and felt her neck before she collapsed to her knees and cried out in pain, her muscles strengthening and her bones adjusting. “NO! Not now, no! How?!” Nicole writhed on the ground, yelling in pain, eyes clenched shut. Nicole fought herself and managed to get to one knee. She opened her eyes and saw herself in the mirror, veins bulging, iris' red. 

“Get out.” Nicole growled to herself, before she cried out again and fell back to the ground, limp. Her veins returned to their normal state, but Nicole's muscles were far stronger than they had been, and after Nicole's body seemed to return to normal, Bulshar snapped open his eyes.

“That's much better.” Bulshar growled out as he sat up. The demon looked over the apartment and saw Calamity Jane, cowering by the front door, he tilted Nicole's head and squinted. “Pathetic.” Bulshar raised his hand and Calamity Jane was lifted off the ground, when Nicole's arm swung down, so did the cat. The demon was satisfied at the lack of movement. 

Bulshar opened the attic and collected his robe, Once satisfied with how he was dressed, he looked in Nicole's bathroom mirror. He turned his head to examine any facial changes, unfortunately, only Nicole's eyes had changed noticeably, the whites of her eyes had turned black, and her once hazel brown iris' were taken over, one with a blood red, the other with a bold yellow. Bulshar closed Nicole's eyes and opened them to reveal Nicole's natural appearance, he gagged and returned the eyes to his own.

“Very pleasing.” Bulshar noted. “Time to go.” Bulshar left Nicole's home and returned to the cave that his followers lived in, he moved the boulder with a single hand and waltzed down the stairs, Bulshar arrived to the plateau he and Nicholas had passed at his first visit, people were doing their jobs respectfully and Nicolas and Ewan supervised. 

“Attention!” Bulshar called out, it boomed inside the cavern. “I have returned, creator of the Earp curse, demon, witch. I am Bulshar, your lord and saviour!” Every member of the cult stopped what they were doing and bowed before their king, their God.

“Long Live Bulshar!” was chanted repeatedly, and Bulshar held out Nicole's arms to bask in the glory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uhh... sorry? Did you like? Hate? Both? Anything I could work on? (other than to stop hurting our favorite red head) Anyways happy pride month!


	17. No One Can Hurt You as Much as Someone You Love.

Several cult members moved the throne from the strategy chamber to the main plateau, there were no rooms designated by walls, but was clear that every section had its purpose, Bulshar sat on top of a flat rock that was in the back of the “ground level”, the stairs continued down past the strategy room to the blacksmiths and the armoury. From the far end of the “ground floor” there was another set of stair cases, one went down to their church, where they prayed to Bulshar, another went down to their library, the third lead to the sleeping chambers, and the fourth lead to the torture chamber.

“My Lord, since you have returned, we may get to business now, we will move in for the gun in less than two hours time, is there anything else you would like us to do?” Carrie was gentle spoken, and Nicholas was by her side, as was Ewan.

“If we must fight the Earps, I will not do it in my robes, have the black smiths down below make me a suit for battle, armour, and the textile workers may create the clothing and a hood that will cover everything but my eyes. Black and purple, if I see anything but, there will be consequences.” Bulshar insisted, and Carrie left to inform the black smiths and the textile workers.

“We know where the heir is, but we still need the child. My Lord... have you found her location in Nicole's memories?” Nicholas asked, and Bulshar groaned in frustration. 

“No, it is being blocked by self loathing and her love for the Earps, I have not yet been able to access it.” Bulshar paused and squinted at Ewan. “Why are you here?” 

“I was meant too be Nicole's husband, your true vessel.” Ewan stated. Bulshar winced in pity for the man.

“Ooh, it seems you have failed,” Bulshar snapped Nicole's fingers together and Ewan's head turned to the side. “Too young for knowledge, and I've seen many other capable warriors. He was... of no use.” Bulshar spoke to himself calmly. 

“My Lord, as a hypothetical, what if you are not able to access Nicole's knowledge of the Earp child?” Nicholas asked in curiosity while he tried to ignore Ewan's limp form.

“I would rather avoid it but I could give up my control of the vessel for however long you must torture her for the information, heal the vessel after the fact.” Bulshar began. “But first we should lie, say that we have people on the way, and follow the heir as she goes after her beloved child. If that fails, we will resort to torturing my vessel.” Bulshar spoke coldly.

“of course, my Lord, as you wish.” 

“And have someone take _that_ away.” Bulshar motioned to Ewan's body. 

Bulshar stood and put on his hood. “If you'd excuse me, I have an errand to run.” Bulshar spoke slowly as he exited the plateau.

* * *

Wynonna had no clue what to do, Waverly hadn't come out of her room still and in the past four days Wynonna hadn't taken out a single Revenant or done any hunting for the cult, she just moped. The Earp heir was awake early that morning and decided to chop some more fire wood since they were running out and the homestead was getting colder by the day. 

Wynonna was half way through chopping wood when she saw Waverly come out the door. 

“Hey Babygirl, finally joining the living I see.” Wynonna joked instead of worrying.

“Uhm, yeah... Nicole's not picking up the phone, so I'm going to head to her place.” Waverly admitted, pointing to the jeep.

“You going to talk to her?” Wynonna asked as she swung down the axe. 

“No, just make sure she's alive, with Purgatory you never know, your phone could be in your car or you could be dead on the kitchen floor.” Waverly spoke sadly. 

“I'm sure she's as fine as she can be. And don't be gone too long, Doc called and he's going to get Rosita to get some drinks and some strong shit for us.” Waverly nodded, Rosita the Revenant, something Waverly hadn't told Wynonna. Rosita would gather it but would not deliver. 

“Yeah, like I said, not sticking around, just making sure she's alive.” Wynonna noticed how red Waverly's eyes were, and knew she had cried more since yesterday. They said their goodbyes before Waverly left in the jeep and Wynonna went back to chopping wood. 

She took her first armful to the house and returned for round two when she saw Bulshar Cult members approach. 

“I'll shoot!” Wynonna warned, Peacemaker held high, they continued to march forward. “I can take out three of you at once, back off.” Wynonna warned again, she avoided killing humans, it messed her up.

One of the Bulshar groupies pulled out a knife from their robe. 

“Goddammit.” Wynonna tensed as she raised Peacemaker at the one with the knife, but it didn't glow, and it wouldn't shoot. “Seriously!?” Wynonna yelled at the gun before she put it back in her boot. The Earp heir ran back inside and grabbed the shotgun that she now kept by the door. 

“Eat shit, shitheads!” Wynonna cocked the gun and fired at the now very close cultists. They fell down, but there was no blood, so she knew she had to aim for the head. One cloaked man had gotten behind her and tried to jump her, but Wynonna smashed the butt of the gun into his temple. Another two got too close for comfort and she had to beat them down as well. Wynonna shot at the remaining members and they dropped, just for one of the first people she shot to regain his ability to stand, as well as the first person she knocked out to push her off the porch of the homestead. The heir dropped the shotgun and gasped for breath as the person she knocked out grabbed Peacemaker from inside her boot, he ran towards the only other man standing and they began to run before Wynonna shot the one holding her gun. The other one dropped down and picked up the gun, before he began to run off. 

“Peacemaker!” Wynonna yelled out, still gasping for air. She thought he got away before she saw Dolls run after him, full force, gun in hand. 

Wynonna managed to hobble up to a stand, with a cough. Dolls jogged back, he held onto Peacemaker with the inside of his jacket. 

“I didn't even hear you pull up.” Wynonna breathed out as he gave her the gun. 

“Yeah I got here as you shot the first one. I came to tell you that there was abnormal Revenant activity in town.” Dolls was breathing heavily. “Why were they after your gun?”

“Who isn't after my gun?” Wynonna asked weakly. “Anyways, help me move these guys behind the barn and tell me about the Revenants in town.” Wynonna pointed to the bodies. 

They did just that, and Dolls explained how a bunch of people came out of Shorty's, demon eyes ablaze and they all walked towards the forest, as if they were being called out to there were a total group of twenty, at least, and there would likely be more, he took photos of the ones he saw so she could take them out. Wynonna told him to lead the way. 

* * *

Bulshar walked to the mountain, to the entrance where his real body laid. “If we're to take over the world, we need a real army, a large one.” Bulshar turned towards Purgatory and let out a large scream, so low only Bulshar's legacies could hear.

“COME, TO THE MOUNTAIN, TO THE MINES, COME TO ME!” Bulshar yelled out. It took about half an hour for the Revenants that did not live in Purgatory, but soon they had all arrived. 

“Is this all that remains of you?” Bulshar called out from the top of the entrance to the mine. 

“The Heir has killed thirty of us, including Bobo! We're the only ones left.” One Revenant answered.

“Who are you?” One of the first comers asked. 

“You will bow!” Bulshar ordered them. 

“Why?” The same Revenant asked. Bulshar mumbled something and held out his hand, the Revenant flew into Bulshar's grasp and dangled off the ground.

“Because I am the reason you all live today, I am your king. I am Bulshar, you fear me, you will respect me, and you will follow me!” Bulshar threw the Revenant back into the crowd, and soon after snapped Nicole's fingers, and the Revenant's head blew. Rosita watched in horror at the scene in front of her, her horror increased when Bulshar tore off his hood to reveal Nicole. Nicole with weird ass eyes. 

Waverly's Nicole. Rosita's mind reeled, if she had a shot at Waverly, she did not want it to be because her last girlfriend turned into a demon. 

“I am the only thing other than the heir that can kill you, so bow!” Bulshar ordered, everyone got to their knees   
and bowed respectfully. Bulshar watched in confusion as someone wearing all white wandered up the mountain.

“Well that is unpleasant.” He noted as he continued to wobble forward, eyes catching the body.

“Sorry I'm late, I had to break out of a well to answer your call, my Lord.” 

“Robert.” Bulshar looked down at the burly man who was clearly deranged, but loyal to his cause. Someone Bulshar would like as his lieutenant.

“My Lord, I have taken to the name Bobo, Bobo Del Ray.” Bulshar nodded as Bobo got to one knee and bowed.   
“Rise!” Bulshar ordered.

“The Earps have destroyed our lives! They care only for themselves!” Bulshar yelled out, the beginning of a movement at his fingertips. “It is our time now, to take them down and to take over Purgatory, we have been kept down for far too long, it is our turn to rule, our turn to live! Fight under my command, along side my mortal followers and soon it is the human race who will be scared!” Bulshar yelled out, and many Revenants yelled a “hurrah!” in support.

“In battle, it will be Bobo who leads your group. But we are not ready for combat yet, for my true body lies in this cave, but I cannot access it myself, it will weaken me and take far to long, as your first sign of good faith, take shifts, make a path down to my tomb! Now return to what you did before, and some stay to begin!” Bulshar ordered, and Rosita immediately made her way towards Purgatory. “Bobo, come with me.” Bulshar brought Bobo back to the cave. 

“Carrie, have the textile workers and the blacksmiths make a uniform for my Lieutenant, Bobo, one for your husband as well.” Bulshar ordered. 

“Now let's fill you in, you utterly pathetic being.” Bobo clenched his jaw but followed his master despite the insult.

* * *

Rosita drove up the highway to the homestead before she passed Wynonna and Dolls in his SUV. 

“Shit.” Rosita didn't realize it until they were way down the road, she spun the car around, just to pop a tire and skid to a hault. “SHIT!” Rosita slammed on her steering wheel. The Revenant tried her phone before she realized it was dead.

Wynonna and Dolls got to town, the sidewalks were filled but Dolls and Wynonna pulled up in front of a store, antiques. “I watched four come out of here, you wanna take them?” Wynonna pulled out Peacemaker and turned off the safety.

“You have no idea how bad I've wanted to kill the last couple days.” Wynonna got out and entered the antiques store. 

“Hi, I'm Wynonna, I'm interested in a few antiques you guys are carrying. A hundred and fifty years old, demonic, people size.” The Revenant behind the counter made a run for it as his eyes turned. Wynonna shot him as he ran, and the earth opened up below him, Hell swallowed the demon. 

“Roger?” Another two Revenant's came out from the side room and saw Wynonna. “Shit, go go go!” They yelled at each other. Wynonna Fired a single bullet, it went through the left side of the first one's head, and the right side of the second. Wynonna walked around the store and looked for the fourth. She whistled like an owner for a dog. Wynonna turned the corner, just to be hit in the face with an old plate. 

“Seriously, dude, you thought that would take me out. Think about whoever's grandma that belonged to!” Wynonna aimed Peacemaker at the Revenant's head. 

“Please don't shoot, all I wanna do is sell these!” He motioned to the antiques desperately, eyes burning.

“For some reason I don't believe you. Make your peace.” Wynonna fired and Hell swallowed him whole.

“Thirty-three down.” Wynonna whispered proudly before she made her way back to the SUV.

“More.” Wynonna insisted. Dolls nodded in acceptance.

Wynonna and Dolls hunted down small nests for the next couple hours, and Wynonna's head count had gotten up to forty-one. 

“That's good for the night,” Dolls insisted, and he drove her back to the homestead. “Take care of yourself. See you tomorrow.” The man drove off after Wynonna thanked him.

* * *

“What do you mean, that they failed to retrieve Wyatt's gun!?” Bulshar roared angrily, Bobo winced from where he sat on the ground, fearful for the cultist's life. 

“We sent a scout, they were all dead, the heir was gone.” Bulshar growled at the three cloaked teenagers in front of him. 

“Do you keep staffs in your armoury?” Bulshar asked the one on the right, the cultist nodded. “Bring me your best.” Bulshar pointed to the one on the left. “Go get me my mask from the textile workers. And you,” he pointed to the one in the middle. “I do not like bad news,” Bulshar mumbled a chanted and twisted his wrist, the boy's forearm bent to a ninety degree angle. “Next time offer a solution or it will be your neck.” 

“Yes my Lord.” The boy ran off to the medical section of the plateau.

Bulshar was first brought the mask, the Demon pulled it on over Nicole's face, it was perfect to hide her features and her hair, only the slit that ran from eye to eye revealed anything. Bulshar pulled up his hood as the other man brought a wooden staff.

“It has a metal core, the ends have been sharpened to a point, and the engravings ensure an even stronger build, my Lord, I hope you find it of use.” Bulshar walked down the plateau and spoke lowly.

“If you want something done, be prepared.” Bulshar grumbled. The demon made it's way to the homestead.

* * *

Dolls had nearly made it to Purgatory when a whirr hit his SUV. 

“The hell?” He got out to see Rosita held the vehicle still.

“We gotta go back, we need to warn Wynonna,”

“She's on the hunt for Revenants, Rosita, she'll kill you without a second thought.” Dolls argued. 

“That doesn't matter, she needs to know that Bulshar is out. She needs to know.” Rosita pushed, clearly exhausted. Dolls got her in and they turned around.

* * * 

“Why the hell didn't you bring your phone?” Waverly accused.

“Sorry, Dolls and I were out Revenant hunting, we only have thirty six left.” Waverly smiled.

“That's amazing, Wynonna, but I'm scared. Nicole wasn't home, and I couldn't get inside, I saw a suitcase, but it was open, I think she was going to leave town, but got interrupted. I should have broken in the goddamn door.” Waverly scolded herself. 

“Hey, no, it's going to be fine, we'll go in guns blazing in the morning, who knows, maybe she'll be back by then. Everything will be fine, Babygirl.” Wynonna held Waverly's face in her hands and kissed her sister's forehead. “I promise.” Waverly's eyes shifted to the barn. 

“Wynonna...” She pointed to what she saw, a black cloak with A purple cuff around the hood and the sleeves, the chest was accented with a jewel embedded blood red V down to the purple belt that matched to rim of the hood, spiked. 

They couldn't see the demon's face but it was clear that they lead the Bulshar cult, because it couldn't be Bulshar, that wasn't Nicole's figure and nothing implied that Nicole knew how to use a staff in battle. 

“What the hell, shoot it Wynonna!” Waverly ordered, terrified. Wynonna held up Peacemaker and the barrel glowed orange, Wynonna fired for Bulshar's head, but the cloaked figure held the staff up and the bullet bounced off, it ended up in the wall of the barn.

“Wynonna, I don't think it's human.” Waverly spoke up worriedly.

“Yeah, no shit!” Wynonna fired another round, or four, but whoever, or whatever it was deflected them all with their staff. Waverly ran for her shotgun but froze when it held up it's arm, still approaching, making it to the barn. The monster threw it's hand to the side and Waverly flew down to the dirt at least four metres from the porch.

“WAVERLY!” Wynonna ran down the steps and walked towards the monster that walked towards her. “Eat lead, asshole.” Wynonna growled and shot more rounds, all deflected my the monster. Wynonna put Peacemaker back in her boot and decided to go for hand to hand, it was easier that way. 

“Give me the gun, Earp heir.” It was definitely a demon, but not Bulshar, because that wasn't Nicole, it couldn't be, Nicole wouldn't have been that stupid.

“Over my dead body.”

“Oh, don't tease, or I'll take you up on the offer. But I'll play fair.” Bulshar threw the staff aside and Wynonna threw a fist. Bulshar gripped Wynonna's hand and twisted. 

“SHIT!” Wynonna yelled out in pain, she fell to her knees, and the demon had her hand twisted behind her back and used that as leverage to pull the Earp to her feet. 

“Care to reconsider?” It asked, and Wynonna caught a glimpse of it's eyes as she answered painfully. It's eyes... they terrified Wynonna.

“Yeah, you can have the gun, after I put a bullet in your brain, dick.” Wynonna threw her leg back and buckled the demon's knee. She used it as leverage to flip it onto it's back, but the demon was one step ahead, and soon Wynonna was the one flat on her back. 

“Not so strong without your gun, Earp.” The demon punched and hit until confident Wynonna wouldn't fight back, but in the process the hood fell down, only the mask hid the demon's identity. Once Wynonna was weak and seemingly harmless, Bulshar grabbed the gun from within Wynonna's boot with gloved hands to prevent being burned. 

When the demon turned it's head back, Wynonna took the chance and ripped off the mask, just to reveal what she knew deep down all along.

“No... goddammit.” Wynonna muttered out weakly, tiredly, hurt that this happened.

Waverly didn't catch the reveal as she charged from behind with a shovel, as the brunette swung down on the head of red hair, Bulshar turned and pried the shovel from the younger Earp's grasp, The shovel was tossed aside and Bulshar held Waverly up by the neck, at least a quarter of a metre off the ground, Bulshar's other fist was drawn back, prepared to strike Waverly into oblivion.

“Nicole...” Waverly's eyes filled with tears. “You don't deserve this.” Waverly choked out and Bulshar's fist tightened around Waverly's throat, but the other fist began to shake, as if it were weak. Waverly swore she saw Nicole's eyes begin to return, but Bulshar let out a low growl and threw Waverly aside. The demon mumbled something out and the staff and mask both flew back into his hand as he picked up Peacemaker. 

“Leave them alone!” It was Dolls, stern and bold as ever, running up from the boundary line. 

“Well that's my cue to go, it's been fun girls. Time to find the child.” Bulshar made a sprint as Dolls fired, but Bulshar was too far gone to be hit. 

“Are they okay!?” Rosita called out fearfully. 

Dolls bent down to Wynonna's side, her nose was broken, her head was split open, she had a black eye, and she coughed up blood, it was almost as bad as what she did to Nicole. “Waverly, is Waverly...” Wynonna gurgled out weakly.

Dolls rushed over and turned the limp girl onto her back. He held his ear to her mouth and heard her breathing steady. 

“She's fine, you'll both be fine.” Dolls spoke stoically as he lifted Waverly in his arms and jogged her back to Rosita, who put Waverly in the back of the SUV while Dolls came back for Wynonna.

“Why'd you come back?” Wynonna choked out in question.

“Because for some reason I have a habit of saving your life.” Dolls tried to tease, he knew that Wynonna would appreciate some humour at this time.

“Why aren't we going inside?” Wynonna asked weakly as they crossed the boundary. 

“Because Rosita has more supplies at the bar than you do here, you're coughing up blood and probably have a concussion, and Waverly probably has a rib or two she needs reset. We're not going to the hospital, no hospital.” He knew that Wynonna didn't trust that building after what happened, it was just a bad reminder for all of them, Nicole, the baby.

“Peacemaker is gone... Nicole...” Wynonna grunted out. 

“We'll get it back, don't you worry, we'll get them back.” Dolls walked Wynonna to the car, and on the way the Earp passed out.

Wynonna woke up in the room where they kept Dolls while he recovered. She looked over to her sister who stared at the ceiling numbly.

“Waverly...” Wynonna rasped out tiredly.

“She would have fought back, she didn't do this because I pushed her away, did she?” Wynonna reached out, but they were too far away from each other.

“No, Nicole didn't tell us, but I know she meant it when she said she'd rather die than join them. She didn't know, Waves.” Wynonna coughed. Waverly held her hands to her face and covered her eyes.

“Wynonna?” Doc came in through the doors. “Dolls, Rosita, they're awake.” Doc called back and Wynonna huffed out a groan as the cowboy jogged forward. 

“How are you two ladies feeling?” Doc asked as he neared, hat held to his chest. Waverly didn't answer, she just muttered weakly to herself and brought her hands back through her hair. The young Earp barely got past her hairline before she hissed and reached for her rib. 

“Bulshar did a number on you both, concussions, broken ribs, more...” Doc admitted, Wynonna looked down as Dolls and Rosita came in. 

“How long were we out for?” Wynonna asked weakly, she tried to sit up but Dolls laid her back down gently while he shook his head.

“Not long, Waverly was out a couple hours, has been awake ever since, you were out longer, five hours? Six?” Rosita pulled out a chair, and Dolls stood while Doc sat next to Wynonna on her cot. 

“They're going to go after our baby... Nicole knew, Bulshar must...” Wynonna rasped out weakly but panicked none the less, as she finally recalled the end of their first encounter with Bulshar. 

“No, they're not.” Waverly countered. “They wouldn't have warned us and risked us interfering, Bulshar has no clue where she is. Maybe Nicole's trying to protect that part of her brain.” Waverly completed, eyes still glued to the ceiling. 

“We can't know that.” Wynonna argued. 

“Call Gus, warn her, but don't go, that will be Alice's death sentence.” Waverly's voice was calm, emotionless, but her eyes were like shattered glass.

“Fine, but we go if Gus is worried.” Wynonna compromised.

“I'm sorry to be such a bother, and to bring this up so soon but Bulshar's back, we need to move, and make a game plan.” Dolls spoke up. “I think you should tell them.” Dolls looked at Rosita and Doc looked at the ground. The Revenant bit her lip and nodded slowly.

“Wynonna, all I can do is ask you not to shoot me when you get your gun back, but I don't really have any leverage here.” Rosita took a deep breath. “Bulshar is making an army to take over the world, the cultists and the Revenants under his command, he wants to show people that they will follow him or die.” Rosita began.

“How do you know?” Wynonna asked weakly. 

“Because, I was in the crowd of Revenants that heard Bulshar call out to us, I'm one of them.” Rosita flashed her true eyes very briefly before she looked down to the ground. 

“I'm not like them, I just want to keep a low profile, to live. I've never been in one of their gangs or anything.” Rosita defended, and Wynonna groaned unhappily. 

“And I don't even have Peacemaker.” The Earp heir commented as she reached for where it usually hung at her waist.

“If you kill Bulshar, then all the Revenants will be human again, they'll still be assholes, but when they die, they'll stay dead.”

“To kill Bulshar, we have to kill Nicole.” Wynonna argued.

“We don't even know if she's still in there,” Dolls reasoned weakly, he would have been the one with a bullet in his eyes if she had her gun.

“She is...” Waverly mumbled out. “I saw her, she wouldn't let Bulshar hurt me, it's so stupid,” Waverly muttered in shame as she brought her hands back up to her face, “-but I think I saw a ghost of her eyes in Bulshar's. She's there, she just can't get to the surface.” 

“But how do we get Nicole to take back control, she's kind of being possessed by one of the strongest beings in history.” Rosita asked genuinely. 

“We'll figure it out, and if the Bulshar thing doesn't work, I won't be able to kill you anyways, because we'll all be dead.” Wynonna replied. 

After they talked about fire power and a plan to get Peacemaker back, how to fight the Revenants and take them down without Peacemaker, and how they could try to defeat Bulshar without harm or injury to Nicole, then they realized that the harm or injury would be inevitable. 

Eventually, Wynonna and Waverly both decided they wanted to back to the homestead to lick their wounds in private, to get to some sense of normal, despite the homestead not being the safest place right now, made very clear very quickly by both Doc and Dolls. Despite their pleas, the Earps had Doc drive them back. 

He helped both of them to the house before he gave Wynonna a gentle hug. “Be safe,” he whispered before he pulled away, he walked to the door, where Waverly stood glumly, he patted her shoulder and squeezed at an attempt of comfort. “We'll get her back.” He tried to say to reassure the girl, but at this point nothing could, Waverly was convinced the world had it out for her and the universe didn't want her to know what happiness was.

“All I've ever done...” Waverly muttered out to Wynonna weakly, “-is focus on you, or the curse, or whoever I'm with. I feel confident enough with Nicole to look at myself, and everything goes to hell...” Waverly pointed out.

“I thought we were over this when we found out about the Widow,” Wynonna argued. “You're allowed to worry about yourself, no one's going to blame you, ever. Waverly, this isn't happening because of you, okay?” Wynonna clarified, Waverly faked an understanding nod. 

“Yeah, whatever you say.” Waverly mumbled rather unhappily before she walked up the stairs without another word. She knew Wynonna was wrong, very wrong, but didn't have the energy to argue back.

* * *

“My Lord, you told me to come to you if we saw anything, correct?” Bulshar nodded, the demon leaned into his throne, legs crossed formally, and the demon's arm rested on the arm of the throne to prop Nicole's head up.

“The Earps have returned to their home, but have not made any move to leave town, I and the other scouts do not believe they took the bait.” 

“Well that is rather unfortunate,” Bulshar glimpsed at the gun in his hand, unimpressed. “Bring this to the blacksmiths, get them to melt it down into a blade,” The demon threw Peacemaker at the young follower. “After, go fetch the scouts, we can't have any more of ours killed by the Earps.” Bulshar ordered, and they young man ran.

“Nicholas.” Bulshar called out, and the older man approached, but evaded Bobo, who sat on the edge of the boulder that Bulshar's throne rested on.   
“Yes, my Lord?” Nicholas asked as he bowed slightly. Bulshar stood and took off the robe, left in nothing but a pair of Nicole's black leggings and a black t-shirt. The demon adjusted the informal top as he continued to speak.

“It's time for plan B, you and Bobo are going to make Miss Haught talk. Take me to the dungeon.” Bulshar ordered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i found it hard to get a rhythm for this and chapter eighteen. I do hope chapter nineteen will be written better than them.   
> Anyways... hate it? Hate me?


	18. Shit, Shit, ShitShitShit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> idk if i should a trigger warning for torture but there is self hate and animal death in this chapter because I'm awful.

“You call these restraints?” Bulshar scolded at the clasps that kept Nicole's hands bound to the ceiling, and the chains around Nicole's feet were slack at best. 

“They do a good job of keeping humans in captivity.” Nicholas ensured, he had traded out his robe for blue jeans and a white dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up, casual clothes the man could afford to ruin. 

“Remember she may accidentally channel my power, hurt her, and it will keep me trapped. I will awaken in an hour to see if you have made progress.” Bulshar explained before Nicole's eyes shut, followed by a few deep breaths. Very quickly, Nicole tried to jerk her arms down as her eyes flew open, wild and terrified. 

“What the fuck?” She looked up angrily before she stared coldly at Nicholas.

“Hello Nicole.” Nicholas rubbed his hands together, soothing the muscles. 

“I know about Bulshar now, I don't know how, but I know it happened. You can do whatever you want, I know you won't kill me, and I won't betray the Earps again, I won't.” Nicole growled. 

“We don't want to kill you,” Nicholas corrected before Bobo punched the woman in the stomach, who curled in on herself in pain. “We're going to make you wish you were dead.” Nicholas spoke coldly.

“Fuck you too, Dad.” Nicole spat on his face. Nicholas took a step away and glared at the bound woman and gave Bobo a look. The Revenant pulled out a knife and cut her upper arm deeply. 

“Where's Wynonna's baby?” The Revenant asked as he snaked his hands up to Nicole's stomach, as if she were with child. The red head tried to swing her knee up to Bobo's crotch but barely bent her knee before the restraints did their job.

“Never.” Nicole replied, Nicholas came up and swung at her face, the impact caused Nicole's whole body to shake violently. “No.” The woman defended. Bobo and Nicholas used her as a human punching bag for the next half hour, and Nicole stayed in denial and wouldn't reveal where the baby was.

“Why protect them? They won't save you, even if they did, Bulshar would come right back out.” Nicholas growled, Nicole's hair balled in his fist. The red head smirked.

“Fine by me, because I don't want to be saved, paying my dues.” Nicole smirked and Bobo—who had looked around the torture devices that scattered the room, and had taken to the spiked belt—whipped her back. 

“Cut off her shirt.” Nicholas growled in frustration, he needed information for Bulshar, so they could continue with their plan.

Bobo took a large hunting knife and cut apart the shirt so it would fall off. 

“Out of all the people in your little group, you were normal, too normal for an Earp's attention, I always knew there had to be something wrong. Something deeply, grotesquely wrong.” Bobo muttered as he pulled off the fabric that left Nicole only in a sports bra.

“Tell us where the child is, and your suffering will end.” Nicholas prompted. 

“Okay, I'll tell you...” Nicole paused and looked up at the man she once called her father. “After you suck my dick.” Nicole's voice was rough yet feisty, and she tried to lunge, held back only by the constrictive restraints.

“Maybe we should just bring Waverly in, make you watch as we torture her.” Nicole glared at the man in front of her.

“Wynonna would shoot you in the ass, then make you eat shit, before you got within twenty feet.” Nicole growled out defensively. 

“Don't be so sure.” Nicholas threatened. “You managed to get Peacemaker pretty well all on your own.” Nicole glared. 

“That wasn't me...” Nicole argued, she ignored it as best she could, but no matter how hard she tried, she remembered. She remembered what it felt like to look through Bulshar's eyes, the dread he wished to bring to man kind, she remembered her cat's bones as they cracked against the floor, Ewan's limp form as he fell, she remembered her hands as they beat Wynonna into submission, just like the heir had done to her. Nicole remembered Waverly, how her hands wrapped around her neck and squeezed, before her girlfriend was tossed aside like a rag doll. It was hard to remember that she wasn't in control, and that Bulshar was. Her brown eyes began to glow red, but before she had the chance to charge and end both Nicholas and Bobo right there on the spot, Bobo used the hunting knife to cut into her torso. The officer cried out in pain as she fell limp again, all unnatural colour left her eyes.

“You'll tell us,” Bobo ensured. “Because eventually, you're very essence will be gone and you won't be able to protect that information, Bulshar will find out anyways.” The Revenant smiled maliciously. “It's only a matter of time.” Nicole's face dropped, but she stayed tense.

“This isn't half as bad as the interrogation training you put me through when I was eleven, Nicholas. You gotta step up the game.” Bobo slapped her, and her father made a new cut on her jaw.

Soon, Nicole gave an unprompted and anguished cry, and clenched her eyes shut, she yanked down her arms, significantly breaking the chains and she hit her head repeatedly. Nicole's hands hit the ground and she held herself up on all fours. Bulshar's eyes were the ones that appeared once they opened. 

“You have not held back,” Bulshar observed as the demon stood, regaining control of Nicole's body. 

“Why would we?” Bobo asked in response.

“She hasn't talked.” Nicholas affirmed. 

Bulshar mumbled out a spell and hovered Nicole's hand over the injured skin, and it healed.

“Well, considering that you caused not only internal bleeding, but also broken bones, I do not believe torture is working.” Bulshar stretched, before he pulled down the sports bra to cover more of Nicole's torso. “There is a bright side to this, we get to do it the old fashioned way.”

“Which old fashioned way?” Nicholas asked. 

“We're going to take over Purgatory while this vessel can hold me, and after we take over Purgatory we'll search every home in every town in Canada until we find the child.” Bulshar smirked. “We'll still give the option of follow or die, I'm not completely unreasonable.” Bulshar moved Nicole's foot and broke apart the chains. The demon walked out, the clasps still around Nicole's wrists and Nicholas watched. 

“Finally,” Bobo exclaimed suddenly as Bulshar left the dungeon. Nicholas looked at the Revenant in confusion. “About time we got to the fun part.” The Revenant pulled up one of the spiked clubs with an insane sense of joy.

* * *

“Waverly, you need to eat.” Wynonna insisted.

“No, not right now.” Waverly argued, completely dismissing Wynonna.

“You can't find her if you die of starvation.” Wynonna pleaded as Waverly looked through an old book as she tried to connect it to the case file.

“A person can go up to three weeks without eating, and I had water last night, so don't even start on that one.” Waverly pointed out.

Wynonna put the plate on the dresser and sighed. 

“Maybe there will be something in her house. Do you want to come with, you'd know if anything was unusual before Dolls and I would.” Wynonna sighed. “Plus I kind of feel like that's something you need to do.” Waverly put the book down and glared at her sister with tired eyes.

“If this is-”

“It's not.” Wynonna cut her off. “I mean you could use the fresh air, yeah, and I'm positive that you must be developing dyslexia at this point, but that's not why, if there would be anything unusual, you'd spot it right off the bat.” Waverly nodded sadly.

“Fine, I'll come...” Waverly finally agreed. “But we're not staying in town, we go to Nicole's, then we come right back.”

* * *

“My Lord, are you sure you wish to move so soon?” Nicholas asked as he put on a similar amount of Kevlar to a SWAT member. 

“It is what we must do.” Bulshar watched as the followers all wore Kevlar while he covered Nicole in copper armour that laid over black chain maille and was connected and sewn together with purple material.

“You do realize they will fight with guns, right my Lord?” Carrie Haught asked. 

“I am more than aware. But I do not need a gun, I will be more than lethal with my staff alone, not to mention the beautiful blade you had the black smiths forge for me.” Bulshar lifted up the wavy blade, the pattern that had been on Peacemaker remained, and the handle of the dagger was still shaped like that of a gun but it still would work well for the knife.

“I did not think you'd want to wait.” Carrie told the demon, who's eyes both seemed to glow orange in the gleam of the silver blade. 

“Robert, come forth.” Bobo walked up with a mumble and Bulshar corrected the statement offhandedly. Bulshar put the knife to Bobo's cheek and the weapon glowed orange itself while the Revenant's eyes revealed his true nature. 

“Good, good.” Bulshar pulled the blade away and sheathed it. “How fitting will it be, when I slice the heir's throat with Wyatt's own gun?” Bulshar asked Nicholas.

“It will be truly poetic, my Lord.” Bulshar smirked at the answer.

“Make sure everyone is prepared for battle, Nicholas. Bobo, go fetch the Revenants bring them here, ensure that they are armed with their preferred weapons.” Bulshar climbed up from the plateau onto his throne where he stood, he raised the dagger that once was Peacemaker and drew the attention of the cult.

“WE HAVE A WAR TO WIN!” Bulshar yelled before the demon's name was chanted proudly by the people. 

* * *

“The spare keys are gone.” Waverly called out from the other side of the porch. Wynonna sighed. 

“Sorry Haught.” Wynonna mumbled, the eldest Earp kicked the door in and gasped at the sight. 

“Shit.” Dolls looked down at the broken form of Calamity Jane, but the animal wasn't completely gone yet, but it was suffering, and Dolls and Wynonna both knew that she wouldn't make it. Wynonna tried to stop Waverly but the tiny woman got past her older sister.

“Calamity-” Waverly put her hand to her mouth. She remembered nights when she and Nicole would watch movies and Calamity Jane would pounce up onto the lap of one of them. Or nights when things would get interesting and CJ would disturb them for a filled dish. Now, all Waverly would ever see would be the cat, whose bone was visible through the blood soaked fur. Calamity Jane tried to make pained sounds and whimpers but all that came out was a weak rasp, Waverly turned into her sister from shock.

“I'm sorry.” Dolls lifted his gun and pulled the trigger. The cat died instantly and was put out of her misery and Waverly shut her eyes tight. 

“It's okay... it's okay.” Wynonna soothed until Waverly was ready, even after Waverly said she could go in, Dolls and Wynonna blocked the view of the deceased cat. 

“I-um- I saw the bag when we first found out she was missing, she was going to leave. I made her want to leave, Wynonna.” Waverly looked back. 

“We all fucked up.” Dolls agreed without blame. He and Wynonna went back to observing while Waverly examined the suitcase, she stared at her picture that aid inside, while the half of the photo that once contained Nicole was shredded on the ground. 

“I made her hate herself, when I should have been helping her heal and deal with the trauma.” Wynonna was about to intervene but Waverly held up a very intimidating finger. “Don't you dare, because it's true and I need to deal with that. I need to learn from my mistakes, my horrible mistakes...” Waverly spoke as she picked up the shreds. 

“She went in her room.” Waverly muttered out as she pocketed the torn up photo. As she got closer she remembered the Widow, how rough she had been, how degraded she felt, how it reminded her of Champ and how he never checked to see if she needed to stop. 

“Wynonna go in, tell me everything you see. Don't spare a detail.” Wynonna obeyed and walked in. 

“It looks like it did when I came and got her some clothes.” Wynonna observed before she stopped dead in her tracks.. “Her closet is open.” Wynonna called out and Waverly's jaw clenched at the memory of how weak and broken Nicole had been, faceless and so vulnerable. 

“You can come out.” Waverly replied. 

“She was on a mission, whatever it is made her PTSD completely irrelevant.”

“Do you think she didn't care?” Dolls asked and Waverly blinked tears away. 

“I think she was guilt ridden and heartbroken... I saw it in her eyes... I should have done everything differently.” Waverly scolded herself rightfully. 

“I don't think we'll find where Bulshar went here. It looks like Bulshar took control and left. I need to get back to the homestead and actually look for the cult.” Waverly closed her eyes as she walked to the front door as she tried to avoid looking at the cat.

Waverly waited for Wynonna and Dolls in the truck. The two walked over but Wynonna stopped to take a call. 

“Doc?” Wynonna asked.

“It's Rosita...I lost my phone on the way to Shorty's so I had to use Doc's get your ass over here, now, bring Dolls and Waverly. Jeremy is already here.” Rosita hung up and Wynonna looked at her phone quizzically. 

“What's up?” Dolls asked just after he opened the driver's door to the Black Badge van. 

“We're going to Shorty's, not the homestead.” Wynonna ordered, much to Waverly's displeasure. “Rosita sounded worried, and pissed. We gotta go, it could be important, she might have seen Nicole.” That stopped Waverly from talking more.   
They made it to Shorty's relatively quickly and Rosita, Jeremy and Doc sat at the bar solemnly. 

“What's going on Revhead?” Wynonna asked as they joined them. 

“Bobo came and gave us Bulshar's orders, we're supposed to raid Purgatory tonight, a group of Revenants at the edge of town, and we're supposed to raid every home until we either all meet at the “Welcome to Purgatory” sign or until we find Alice. Then we move on to the rest of the Ghost River Triangle, and then the cult will take it from there as we bask in the glory here.” Rosita paused. “They plan on letting you live until you willingly leave the Triangle with a Revenant at your side, then Bulshar is going to kill you too.” Rosita took a gulp as she looked at the group grimly. 

“They'll give an option to the people, they follow Bulshar the “god” or they die painfully on the spot... I don't know what to do.” Rosita told Wynonna. 

“Every Revenant in the goddamn Triangle and I don't even have Peacemaker.” Wynonna muttered. 

“I know I can do some pretty good damage,” Rosita admitted shyly, scared of her fate if she fought against everyone, if she fought against Bulshar.

“You can't do it alone, they'll rip you apart.” Waverly mumbled from the side. 

“It's better than fighting with them.” Rosita argued. Jeremy cleared his throat at the discussion. 

“Um, decapitation will slow them down more than a simple bullet will, just saying.” 

“We have to put together an army by tonight? When we're almost guaranteed defeat?” Dolls asked Rosita in clarification, and the Revenant simply nodded. 

“That is quite unfortunate,” Doc mumbled unhappily. Dolls let out a exhale that sounded like he was internalizing a scream of frustration. 

“I won't take my serum.” Dolls declared, and everyone could agree that a man-dragon would be helpful. 

“I'll use a machete or something and take them out.” Waverly piped up. 

“We'll shoot 'em to slow 'em down, give some time.” Doc chipped in his two cents. 

“We're actually doing this?” Jeremy asked, clearly terrified and he earned several glares from the group. “I'll throw together something to freeze them still because that would be helpful and cold makes people stiff and they aren't able to move that's helpful and-um and, and I'll stop talking.” He quickly babbled out at the glares.

“Will Nicole be there?” Rosita nodded. 

“Bulshar will lead the Revenants and the Cultists into town.” Rosita looked at Wynonna. “You okay with killing the humans too?” The heir took a shaky breath and nodded sternly. 

“It's what we have to do, they wouldn't hesitate to take us out.” Wynonna declared. 

“Yeah, and they'll succeed if we're the only ones there. We need back up.” Dolls insisted. 

“I'll go talk to Nedley. I think I can get him to stand with us pretty easily. All I need to do is remind him that his protege has been hurt. He'll come running.” 

“I... I could talk to Champ or Pete, one of the buffoons from high-school, get them to help, even just to warn people, get them out to the homestead.” Waverly volunteered sadly. 

“We have have a starting point, a foot hold.” Dolls said calmly. “We're going to do this.” 

“We're going to get Nicole back.” Waverly added.

“And you better bet your ass we're going to win.” Wynonna held out her fist and Doc covered it with his own hand before the action was repeated by Waverly, then Doc, Rosita and Jeremy.

“Go team!” Jeremy exclaimed as he threw his hand in the air, before he was embarrassed when no one else followed the action. “Oh, not doing a cheer, just a salute of confidence and trust, that's cool, that's okay too.”

They all prepped as best they could. Wynonna was correct when she said Nedley and the department would join their cause without much prompting, and she even made a call to Perry and he brought in as many people as he could. Waverly had convinced Champ, Pete, Kyle and Chrissy to all go knocking on doors and tell people to go to the Homestead, Dolls brought an armory of blades and guns, Jeremy brought his own special device, Doc came after he managed to get over his fear of getting shot, he knew he wasn't immortal any more and he did not want to risk it, and Rosita prepared herself for a painful night. 

They had an army of their own, about seventy people total and they were ready, at the farm on the edge of town across from the main entrance to Purgatory. And they waited. The majority of them were armed with a sword or blade of some sort and the rest were armed With guns from behind the police cruisers and the Black Badge trucks. And they waited for Bulshar's army.

“They're coming.” Rosita warned. “All of them.” The Revenant tensed as she heard their shouts and battle cries. 

Soon, Bulshar's army came into view There had to be over a hundred and fifty, plenty of them were super human, and the rest wore Kevlar for protection. And of course, in armor and the cloak, staff in hand was Bulshar. The demon unsheathed a blade and called out a battle cry in in Latin that not even Waverly understood. The blade glowed orange in the darkness and Wynonna noticed the odd angle that the blade sat at, before it hit her and she gasped. 

“Bitch that better not be my gun!” Wynonna lunged but Dolls held her back briefly. Before she made a move she'd regret later on.

Without any more prompting, both sides charged each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I've finished writing the story, I'll probably post every other day considering the net few chapters are pretty short, I hope you have enjoyed the story so far. And if you hate it, that's fine too.


	19. Morton's Fork

Just to be clear, the Earps were not prepared despite whatever they thought. Fighting against a army of Revenants and people in SWAT gear lead by their warlock, demonic, superhuman leader was harder to do in practice than it was in theory.

Despite a good forty or fifty people hanging back to shoot at the army, they just still could not keep up with how quickly everyone else could decapitate or fight off the other Revenants. 

Wynonna did her best to fight her way through the Revenants to Nicole, but she kept getting charged. Apparently, the demons who you were born to kill off had a bone to pick whether you could kill them or not.

Waverly had been stopped by Bobo and Nicholas, both monsters knew how important the woman was to Nicole and they very well knew that she could ruin the entire thing. So she and Doc were fighting them off the best they could. It was not working well. 

All of the police department and some of the people Perry brought had stayed back behind the barricade all the vehicles made, with Dolls to shoot at the Revenants but a small part of the army were fighting their way through the majority of Perry's group.

Rosita had done a pretty good job of tearing through her Revenant family members. She was probably the only one close to being as busy as Wynonna when it came to people who were not pleased and wanted revenge. They felt personally attacked that Rosita would choose the people who killed them instead of her own kind, over the person who gave them the life so many of the Revenants viewed as a gift. Rosita fought them all off, but her endurance and power were wearing thin.

Jeremy stayed close to the barricade of cars and vans to use his weapon to slow the oncoming Revenants, but despite how “on fire” he was, his gun was likely about to over heat. After it did, the people behind the line would likely be safer in front of it.

Nicole was another story. Bulshar had allowed the army to march a head of him but in no way did the demon hold back. Perry's men had fought through quicker than Wynonna or the other members of Black Badge, no one had a grudge, and no one feared them the way they did the others. Unfortunately, it wasn't a fortunate scenario.

Every time someone got a little too close, Nicole thrust the blade into their neck, or beat them into an incapacitated state with a few powerful swings of Bulshar's staff.

Even though all Nicole used was Bulshar's strength, bodies were still scattered at the woman's feet.

No one had been prepared for that.

Soon, the people Perry brought learned their lesson and began to fight off the army and it allowed Bulshar to make his way through the chaos. Bulshar didn't go for Wynonna or Waverly, but moved Nicole's body towards Rosita, who was fighting off as many Revenants as she could while she was in full Revenant mode herself. 

Bulshar mumbled something and threw his hand out, all of the Revenants Rosita had been fighting flew back so Bulshar could have the girl for himself. 

“You pathetic piece of shit.” Bulshar roared, Nicole backhanded Rosita and the Revenant flew through the air into the field. Doc fired at Nicole's leg as she marched towards the fallen Revenant but the wound closed as soon as it was made. “You dare fight against your own kind!” Bulshar dropped the staff and mounted Rosita before he took Nicole's hand and beat the shit out of her. She put up a sad fight, but it was best she could do.

As Bulshar got off of Rosita, Nicole was fighting to break out of her own mind. But she had been doing so since she had been possessed, she knew she wouldn't be able to get out now.

“I am the person who gave you this life! Each of your lives! And you try to fight against me! You have the AUDACITY TO FIGHT AGAINST ME!” Bulshar lifted Rosita's broken figure off of the ground by her shirt collar.

“So disloyal, so ungrateful, you so such disrespect to the person who gave you EVERYTHING!” Bulshar slammed Rosita into the ground and everyone stumbled and some people fell from the shock wave it sent out. 

Bulshar pulled out the blade and raised it high in the air and Rosita's eyes revealed themselves once again as the blade glowed orange. 

“Peacemaker don't you dare! Do let him do this to you, Peacemaker!” Wynonna yelled out. 

“Nicole, please don't do this! Fight him! Fight it!” Waverly begged as she tried to move forward but was fought against. Wynonna was held back by her own fight too. 

“Peacemaker, don't!” Wynonna yelled one last time Bulshar plunged the blade in the side of Rosita's neck before he made Nicole slice the Revenant's throat. The fact that Peacemaker had burned Nicole's hand severely did not bother the monster.

Rosita still screamed. No one knew how, but Rosita still managed to scream from the pain in the beginning, when the ground caught fire and swallowed her whole, then the screams stop. If it weren't Nicole everyone would have shot at Bulshar.

Bulshar didn't bother to wipe the blood splatter off of Nicole's face, the monster just used magic to bring th staff to Nicole's hand before Bulshar just strode forward back to the fight. 

Towards Wynonna. 

Dolls saw the advance Bulshar was making, and watched Jeremy as his gun jammed. The people that weren't trying to kill Wynonna and weren't fighting Perry's men would make it behind the barricade easily. 

“Move out! Get to Wynonna! Take some heat off her!” Dolls ordered as the first of the Cultists made it past the barricade. 

“Not today Satan.” Nedley fired at someone behind Perry and they dropped to the ground before everyone behind the barricade moved forward. Dolls shoved a riffle in Jeremy's arms before he ran over and started to fire at the Revenants that surrounded Wynonna. Soon the BBD agent found a discarded machete and used it to decapitate the Revenants he managed to bring down. 

“Wynonna!” Doc yelled out from where he and Waverly fought, so the woman had enough time to duck down when Dolls shot the Revenant numerous times. Wynonna cut of the demon's head as it dropped.

“Can you take them?” The Earp asked Dolls, The Black Badge Agent nodded and Wynonna made her way through the Revenants.

Waverly threw her wooden swords at Bobo, but the Revenant grabbed hold of them and flipped Waverly onto her back. Doc shot him and Bobo dropped to the ground again, temporarily. Nicholas grabbed Doc but the cowboy fought back. 

“Go help Wynonna!” Doc ordered and Waverly complied as she grabbed the swords she'd been using. 

Wynonna walked forward as Waverly sprinted from the far side of the field. Wynonna was stopped by a Revenant who was soon chopped down by Perry. 

“I got your back, Earp.” Wynonna continued to fight her way through the crowd until she and Perry got through the fight and the chaos. They began to close the gap between themselves and Bulshar. Waverly couldn't run fast enough to make it to the showdown. 

Especially not after Bulshar mumbled out a spell that froze Waverly in place, Waverly and everyone besides Wynonna and Bulshar himself.

“What did you do!?” Wynonna asked angrily as she looked at Perry's frozen figure, as long as the rest of the people in the fight.

“Something you could not possibly fathom. You are not enlightened enough to see.” Bulshar spke with a scary calm.

“You're not the first person I've met that likes to fuck with time. I beat that asshole too.” Wynonna replied, she spoke with the same calm in her voice.

“You must know that you cannot win.” Bulshar stopped as Wynonna did the same. They were merely a metre or so apart. Wynonna was thankful that it was a demonic and deep voice that spoke and not Nicole's, just as much as she was thankful that she wasn't looking in Nicole's eyes. 

“We can, because we're not fighting to take over the world, we're fighting to save it. And something my sister always says, but something I think Nicole taught me, is that yeah the good guys go through so much shit but in the end, we win. The good guys always win. Nicole, you went through fight after fight, you spent your whole life fighting, one piss situation after another. After this you won't have to fight anymore, Nicole, you deserve your peace.” Wynonna took Perry's pistol as the man was frozen beside her. 

“I just don't want my kind to have to hide anymore. I am not the bad guy here, I don't want my kind to have to hide in the shadows. Imagine if you were killed for being who you are, having to hide from a world that could never understand.” Bulshar taunted, his yellow eye seemed to glow brighter. 

“No, it's called being trans, or gay, or anything other than being white and straight. No one deserves to be bashed on, except monsters like you who don't know the difference between equality and taking over the fucking world. Someone who deserved to be out in the open wouldn't have possessed someone!” Wynonna argued.

“You won't kill her, and you won't get her back.” Bulshar pointed out.

“No, I'll get her back or I will kill you, because despite how shitty I was to her, despite how fucking blind I was, I know that she'd want me to stop you, like she said she'd rather die than side with you.” Wynonna too a shaky breath and Bulshar smiled at how her hand shook as it held on to the pistol. 

“Why? Why do you insist to fight a battle you cannot possibly come out of victoriously. That cut on your head, the black eye that has begun to fade, I did that, and I was not even trying to kill you. In what twisted for of reality to stand a chance?” Bulshar asked with utter confusion.

“Because, I might hate half the people in the world, but they don't deserve damnation. And because despite how much I hate people, I love them too. And I know Nicole probably has the same viewpoint, and she'll fight you, she'll fight you as long as she can.” Wynonna spoke, she believed every word she spoke. “Nicole if you can hear me, we're going to do everything we can, you just need to fight him too, fight him on the inside while we work from the outside.” Wynonna called out, louder as if that would change whether or not her message got through.

“I don't know about you but I'm done with talking it out, let's get to it.” Bulshar spoke, his tone bored but the look in his eyes were full of pain, as if Nicole was fighting her way out. 

“Agreed.” Wynonna sheathed her pistol and stuck to the machete she walked into the battle with. Wynonna stepped forward and Bulshar lunged with his staff ready to kill. Wynonna blocked Bulshar's first swing and everyone moved again. The fights began and Waverly was back to sprinting towards her sister and Nicole.

Perry didn't know how to help, Wynonna and Bulshar were moving too quick for interference. Wynonna swung her Machete, Bulshar blocked and made his own attack in the same movement. Bulshar would go to take out Wynonna's legs and the Earp would leap back or jump up over the staff. Bulshar lifted the staff and swung down, and Wynonna held up her machete to block the attack. The impact shattered her blade and sent her to the ground. 

Wynonna scampered back with her hands while Bulshar pulled out the dagger that Peacemaker made. 

“Not my own gun.” Wynonna pleaded with Bulshar, who nodded Nicole's head unsympathetically.

“Nicole fight it, Nicole, fight. No!” Waverly yelled out as she finally got close enough to the situation. Wynonna looked up sympathetically as she drew the pistol and aimed for Bulshar's head. When Bulshar held up the blade and threw it down, aimed for Wynonna's chest, the Earp fired the gun. 

“NO!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I named the chapter solely for the last two paragraphs. Sorry, not sorry. Another chapter closer to the end. I hope you enjoyed this, if you hated it also fair.


	20. Not So Happy Ending

Perry stumbled from the impact of both the bullet and the force of how Bulshar stabbed him. He wouldn't have gotten in the way had he known Wynonna was going to take Bulshar out. Wynonna's eyes were wide, Bulshar scowled and Waverly froze in place, shocked after she saw Wynonna's bullet and Bulshar's blade struck Perry.

“No... no.” Wynonna mumbled with fear and sadness as Perry limped and stumbled away from both Bulshar and Wynonna. 

“Well that was anti-climatic.” Bulshar spoke with disappointment before the demon spoke a spell and the dagger flew through Perry's chest back to Bulshar's hand, which caused the man to fall to his knees from shock. Wynonna felt the blood that had splattered on her face from when she shot the man who had helped them so much. 

“Perry!” Wynonna yelled out as the man fell to his knees. 

“I said I had your back.” Perry fell forward and Wynonna was terrified that it might have been her who caused the man's death. Everyone on Wynonna's side tried to stay focused on their own battles but it was quite hard. 

“Let's get back to it.” Bulshar spoke, rather unimpressed and not affected by the situation whatsoever. The demon grabbed Wynonna's shirt collar and threw her towards the man she had just assisted to kill. 

Waverly yelled at Bulshar and pleaded with what parts of Nicole might have been left.

“How does that make you feel, Earp?” Bulshar used his staff and hit Wynonna's knee, which sufficiently broke it. The Earp heir screamed as Bulshar continued to speak. “You've probably killed more people today than you've killed Demons in your life time, you've killed an innocent, at this point, Wynonna, are you any better than me?” 

“I didn't know, I didn't mean to.” Wynonna tried to stand but Bulshar hit her other leg with a swift strike of his staff and Wynonna let out an angered yell. 

Wynonna growled at Bulshar, eyes wild and angry. Waverly tried to get in Bulshar's way, get Nicole to look at her, but the demon pushed the younger Earp aside with so much force she flew through the air like Rosita had, sh landed much closer but it still would have hurt. 

“WAVERLY!” Wynonna yelled out. Doc and Dolls both shot at Bulshar when they could but the wounds closed as quickly as they opened. 

“Pathetic.” Bulshar lifted Wynonna to her feet and punched her backwards before she could fall back to the ground. Wynonna spat out a tooth and groaned because of her once again swollen cheek. 

“I love that after so much time, I get to finally put one of Wyatt's heirs in the ground.” Bulshar threw Wynonna up again to throw another punch that broke her nose, which bled like a geyser.

“I revel in the fact that Wyatt will rot in hell, and have to comfort of meeting yet another one of his relatives,” Bulshar kicked Wynonna from her spot on the ground which caused her to flip and roll away. 

“He'll meet yet another failure and know that I bested him again.” Bulshar laid a boot on Wynonna's broken knee which made her cry out. 

“Wynonna!” Doc yelled out, but Bobo threw him aside before he could do anything. She realized that she was now closer to Doc, Bobo and Nicholas than she was to where the main fight went on. Bulshar unsheathed the dagger Peacemaker.

“Stand up.” 

“Fuck you...” Wynonna slurred out. 

“Stand up and die with at least some dignity, Earp.” Bulshar scolded. “Or will you die a coward, just like the rest of your family.”

“Maybe you shouldn't have broken my fuckin' legs..” Wynonna argued as she struggled to her feet groaning in the process. Eventually, Wynonna did get to her feet and she stood weakly in front of Bulshar. 

“What did you say? The good guys always win? I guess this proves my point that I'm not the villain here, society is.” Bulshar prepared to stab Wynonna, but Waverly stood in between the two, her hands balled up in Bulshar's shirt.

“Waverly don't-” Wynonna pleaded but Waverly began to talk before her sister could finish.

“Stab me. Just do it.” Waverly began. “Look, Nicole, I don't know if you can hear me, or if you even want to, but you need to try. Fight, come back to us, I need to make everything up to you, each moment, I need to fix things, because you deserve the world, Nicole, and I don't know if I can give it to you, but I want to try.” Waverly began and Bulshar's grip faltered on the dagger, and the angry glare wasn't just angry, but hurt too.

“I want you to live a long happy life, and I don't care if it's with me or not, I just want you in this world Nicole, even if you aren't mine. I love you, I know that it might not seem like it and that I have to work on it but I do, I love you Nicole Haught, flaws and all. And it's hard because I don't think you'll ever accept me for all of mine, which you shouldn't. You've made mistakes to protect me, to protect us, I've made mistakes to be a jackass...” Waverly looked hopefully into Bulshar's eyes, she hoped that Nicole's eyes would shine through, like at the homestead. 

“And if you don't want to fight for us, I understand that, I forgive it even, but I won't forgive it if you don't fight at all, this world needs you Nicole, you're a hero, and you're so so good, even if I didn't see that, you can't give up Nicole. And if you stab me, I'm okay with that, because it means you're gone, and I don't want to live in a world where you're gone. So do it, or come back to me.”

Bulshar scowled in fury. And Waverly watched as a tear fell down Nicole's face that she knew was not Bulshar's. Nicole sobbed from the cage inside her mind as she struggled to get out, to take back control.

The monster glared at Waverly, and he wrapped Nicole's hand around the blade firmly. Bulshar thrust the blade forward as a mix between his voice and Nicole's yelled “NO!” 

Wynonna tried to walk forward but fell to the ground. When she looked up at where the blade was, it simply had cut Waverly's side, Nicole moved her hand at the last minute. 

The scream from Bulshar got everyone's attention and the fights stopped, everyone simply looked at the demon king.

“I knew it.” Waverly spoke softly with happiness as Bulshar's eyes slowly faded back to Nicole's. “You fought it.”

“I don't have long, he's already coming back...” Nicole rasped out sadly as she backed away from her girlfriend. “Did I hurt you?” Nicole asked Waverly, whose eye was black from the backhand, and Wynonna didn't look too hot herself.

“Because of you I'll be okay, come here.” Waverly held out her arms, not realizing that Nicole was still fighting Bulshar for control.

“He won't stop.” Nicole told the young brunette. “He won't leave, and you can't kill him...” Nicole murmured out. Waverly's eyes grew three times in size as she realized what Nicole was leaning towards.

“Don't do it, we'll figure something out, together, Nicole you don't have to do this.” Waverly walked forward weakly. Nicole lifted up the blade and it began to glow blue.

“I love you too, Waverly, thank you.” 

Nicole jammed the blade in her own throat exactly as Bulshar took over again. Bulshar pulled out the bloodied blade as he and Nicole fell to the ground.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry? Just remember the story isn't over yet. Hope you enjoyed or hated it... I don't know, I tried, it's something.


	21. How To Cope.

Waverly rushed forward and saw Nicole laid flat on her front, the blade in hand. She turned Nicole's body over and sobbed while she was covered in her girlfriend's blood. As Waverly screamed and cried, most of the Revenants became human again, those who were old and more demon than human, like Bobo, made a run for the hills, just like the majority of the cultists as they were attacked and arrested. Nedley, Jeremy, Doc and Dolls all rushed over to the scene where Wynonna, Waverly and Nicole were.

“That's going to be hard to clean up...” Jeremy spoke when he got there first, and made an inappropriate and awkward comment in true Jeremy fashion, and Waverly would have shot him had she heard him over the sound of her sobs. 

Neither Doc nor Dolls could look at Waverly and Nicole. Dolls because he knew he'd never forgive himself if he actually saw the scene that was now behind him, and Doc because he couldn't take any more tears. 

Nedley's jog was the slowest and he made it there last, when he saw his protege covered in blood, limp in Waverly Earp's lap, he just took off his hat and pressed it to his chest, his mustache twitched as the tears slowly came. 

“Is she?” Wynonna asked from flat on her back, all Doc could do was nod.

Waverly cried out “I'm sorry” and “It should have been me” repetitively. She felt horrible for her role in Nicole's death and she almost wished Nicole hadn't fought her way out, because she may have been possessed, but she was alive.

"You deserve better... you deserved everything, it should have been me..." Waverly clung to Nicole's limp figure tightly.

Jeremy watched before it clicked. “Wait...” Jeremy moved forward and moved for Nicole's wound. Waverly violently pushed him away and screamed for him to back off and get away.

“Please, I need to see something, I'm not going to take her from you.” Jeremy moved slower this time, and wiped away the blood that would have been from the wound, except there was no evidence of of the injury. Jeremy knew enough about neck wounds to know that yes a person could bleed out within thirty seconds, but the blood would keep coming for minutes after.

Jeremy looked and smiled. “Oh my god.” He backed away with a smile and Waverly looked up at him quizzically, eyes wide like a hurt puppy dog.

“Check her pulse.” Jeremy laughed out bitterly, shocked and flabbergasted. Waverly did, and at first it took her a moment, but she felt the weak but steady throb.

“She's alive... oh my god she's alive...” Waverly looked at Nicole with hope and love in her eyes. 

Waverly hugged Nicole tightly and soon Nicole's arm threw itself around her back and gripped onto Waverly's shoulder, who felt her bone crack from the vice grip.

“I'm sorry. I'm sorry.” Both women apologized and there were cheers all around from grateful people. It was over, Bulshar was dead and only a couple handfuls of Revenants remained.

* * *

Nicole was the first one to visit where Rosita died, and the first one to visit every grave where some one she had killed was laid to rest. She was the one to bury Calamity Jane, Waverly by her side. 

The red head knew she had a lot to make up for, and she was willing to atone for all of it. The guilt was killing her slowly and she'd barely been back for a day, she didn't know how she'd bear if it went on for a prolonged period of time. She felt like she was drowning, still trapped in her mind. Even through she didn't have trouble sleeping anymore, she still had nightmares, about her going to hell, reliving all of the murders. She still hated herself, but at this point, all Nicole could do was cope and grieve. 

She and Waverly spent a lot of time together the next couple days and it became apparent that event though Bulshar was dead, Nicole still harboured his powers, at least his strength, for all they knew Nicole had his magic abilities too, but she didn't know Latin and fortunately she didn't have a secret spell book either. The young Earp kept to her promise and worked hard to make it up to Nicole, and the red head appreciated every moment.

“What was it like?” Waverly asked as they watched the screen of the TV. It seemed out of the blue, but at the same time Nicole knew it was called for and that her curious girlfriend would like to compare at one point or another.

“Horrible...” Nicole muttered as she absentmindedly twirled her hand through Waverly's hair. 

“Do you remember much?” Waverly asked and she looked up at Nicole, who immediately stopped the soothing action and tensed up. “We don't have to if you don't-”

“Everything. I remember everything.” Nicole cut her girlfriend off with a sad tone.

“Everyone he-”

“Yeah... and I feel it too, how it made him feel, how he loved the power it gave him. Everything he felt, everything he did, everything he said, I remember...” Nicole teared up, she was scared that it was her, that the enjoyment was her own and not Bulshar's. She was heart-broken that she killed innocents when all she ever wanted to do was save. She worked so hard to prevent him from taking over, but she came to Purgatory, she got involved again and that was her first mistake. It was because of her that Bulshar even had the chance to reign free. "Waverly, compared to Bulshar, Mikshun was a walk in the park..."

Waverly wrapped her arms around Nicole protectively, despite how much Nicole didn't want to cry, but she couldn't help it. The brunette comforted Nicole and didn't leave her side.

* * *

It wasn't until Nicole's fourth day back that she visited Wynonna at the homestead. 

“I'm sure that he wasn't as good as Maddie was, but I got you something.” Nicole pulled out a gun shaped item that was wrapped in cloth, the 3rd degree burn scars would never heal from how careless Bulshar had been with it, so Nicole did not make the same mistake. She watched and Wynonna unwrapped Peacemaker and squealed. 

“I missed you, you asshole.” Wynonna cheered as she hugged her gun. 

“There are still Revenants out there.” Nicole told the heir. “Kill each and every one of them.” Nicole knew her father had made it out of the battle alive too but that was a petty revenge thing that Nicole now realized life was too short for.

“Thanks, Haught.” 

“When you want to bring her home, just send me a text.” With that, Nicole left the homestead. 

Dolls had visited Nicole, mainly apologized for not helping more, for the file getting out even though he had no clue how and he had nothing to do with it, Nicole knew that now. 

While Waverly would come to hate it later, Doc visited Nicole the same day as Dolls, whisky ready. 

“How you dealing?” He had asked as he took the first drink from his glass. 

“I know I didn't do it, but at the same time I feel it, all of them, I felt the life drain out of them, and I know how it made Bulshar feel, each kill was like he did a shot of ecstasy, he loved the power.” Nicole told him honestly.

“It's like living another year when you're immortal, it just reminds you that in some way or another, even though you aren't, that you're better than everyone else. It wasn't till recently I realized how much I truly hid behind that damn ring.” Nicole nodded.

“How'd you get over it? Wyatt's hate, the shit you did with the Revenants?” Doc sighed and raised his glass.

“Unfortunately Miss Haught, you ask decent questions.” Doc told her.

“I'll never forget how I hurt Wyatt, but it was the new life I started, helping Wynonna, helping fight for his cause that makes it easier. Starting over.” Doc explained and Nicole thought it over hard. 

She and Doc said farewell after he provided her with some more advice, and after they chatted a bit more.

* * *

Nicole called Waverly over the next day. She had already been worried, but when the young brunette arrived, she knew by Nicole's apologetic demeanour that what the officer had to say wouldn't be good. 

“What is it, Baby?” Waverly asked nervously. 

“After my PTSD from the Widows, Bulshar fucked with me Waves, and seeing my parents, being reminded of everything that happened in the past, and the fact I still have his powers... it's just... it's really getting under my skin. ” Nicole fidgeted with her hands as she tried to explain.

“What are you saying?” Waverly asked cautiously, scared of Nicole's answer. 

“I don't think Purgatory is the best thing for me right now, Waverly.” Nicole told her girlfriend truthfully. The young Earp's heart shattered a little bit, they weren't back to normal yet, but how could they get back to normal if Nicole was gone?

“You're leaving...” Waverly confirmed and while Nicole bit her lip, she nodded. “When?”

“I was thinking in a day or so, I don't know for how long.” Nicole answered as she and Waverly sat on the couch. 

“Do you know where?” Waverly asked and Nicole shook her head again.

“Edmonton, maybe Toronto, somewhere in the city where noise won't make me flinch.” Nicole admitted. It was too quiet in Purgatory now, after the constant noise that was in her head before everything happened.

“How long?” Nicole took Waverly's hand in her own, gentle so as not to accidentally use her new found power.

“I don't expect you to wait for me. I don't know how long it will take for me to get a sense of normal again, I can promise you it's not goodbye, and I call, whenever I can.”

“I just got you back...” Waverly whimpered out sadly.

“You can be upset. I don't remotely expect you to understand, but I just want you to know.” Nicole told her girlfriend warmly, tears of her own prepared to fall.

“I just-I need to know one more thing,” Waverly asked and Nicole nodded quickly.

“Is it because of me?” Waverly asked and Nicole took in a sad gasp.

“Baby, no.” Nicole moved so she was in front of her girlfriend. “I love you more than anything, but I need to learn to love myself first, I need to figure out if I'm still... me. So much has happened and I don't know what normal is anymore. Bulshar did so many horrible things, and I can feel that, the pain he caused, that I caused, and how he thrived because of it. I don't know who I am, and I need to figure that out.”

“But that wasn't you, you couldn't do anything, you weren't in control.” Waverly argued desperately.

“I know, but it doesn't change that feeling... I just, I need to figure this out, and I can't do it here, and I can't do it unless I'm one hundred percent focused on me... I need to be a little selfish right now, Waves.”

“I want to go with you... but I get it... Lord knows I was... I still don't know who I am right now, I get that you need to figure the same thing out.” 

“You are extraordinary, Waverly Earp. And as long as you'll have me, I'll be out there, and I'll come home to you.”

“I'll wait, a long as it takes.” Waverly kissed Nicole passionately and soon the women just turned on a film and forgot about their troubles for the time being.

* * * 

Nicole's going away party was small but sweet. Nedley promised that she had a job waiting for her when she returned, and Dolls ensured the same thing with Black Badge. Jeremy was an awkward little goofball but thanked Nicole for accepting him and not judging him. It was Nicole who thanked Doc for the connection they shared, even if their experiences weren't exactly the same, they were close enough and it helped both of them in the long run. Wynonna eventually hugged Nicole and apologized profusely as she thanked Nicole for not killing her sister as Bulshar, and Nicole made it clear that when Wynonna wanted Alice home all she had to do was text. Both woman were haunted by their actions but the difference was Wynonna didn't have an excuse, but Nicole understood even when she didn't have to. It made it clear to the eldest Earp that her sister had fallen in love with a saint.

Then Nicole and Waverly's goodbyes came, the hug lasted ages as they whispered sweet nothings into each others ears and mumbled how they'd miss the other and how much they loved each other profusely. They kissed and kissed and kissed some more before Nicole couldn't put it back any longer and she had to leave. Nicole gave Waverly her white stetson before she drove away, Purgatory behind her in a bittersweet, temporary goodbye. 

Before she left for Edmonton, Nicole made a stop for little (almost one!) Alice-Michelle, it was a brief visit, but she happily delivered the gifts. Alice's papa had found her a tiny black cowboy hat that was still far too big, Wynonna put in a water gun that looked like Peacemaker and a note, Waverly put in a blanket that would last, it had a few things on it that would prove that she was an Earp. A motorcycle, a whisky bottle, a flame thrower, and a gun in each corner, but sewn into the center was a cartoon of a bonfire, Nicole kissing Waverly's cheek, Wynonna and Doc holding Alice up high like Simba, Jeremy in awe of a stoic Dolls, Rosita flexing with her Revenant eyes, and Perry who had his palm on his face in disbelief. What Nicole couldn't believe is that Waverly stitched it with such short notice and still came up with something so beautiful. 

Alice had climbed all over Nicole, in awe of her fire red hair and how active she was. The baby couldn't have known that Nicole would be able to fly her around like a plane, and she couldn't have known that such an action was nearly impossible for the older Gus.

After that visit Nicole really was off, away from the crazy life she'd become accustomed to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> one chapter left. I feel like I should post it just before the season three premiere. Would that be mean?


	22. Epilogue

Nicole kept her promise, she called on occasion and she answered happily whenever Waverly called considering how irregular their conversations were. 

Nicole also got a few calls from Hal, on days when other teenagers sucked and he needed to confide in someone who understood.

After several months in Edmonton, Nicole went to Toronto for Pride and she sent videos of the crowded streets to Hal. Eventually she met a few of her buddies from the Police Academy. She told them about the easier stories from Purgatory, about Wynonna and Waverly, the “people” that put her through a loop more than once.

And it was true, the first year or so was difficult but it got harder the longer Nicole was away and their calls became even more irregular and even more uncommon as the long distance took its toll on both women. Questions like “when will you come home” and comments like “it's been so long” started to pop up and it was hard on Nicole, yes, but she needed to figure her life out.

While Nicole still refused to pick up Latin just in case she accidentally did something horrible, she did learn how to control her strength. It also became clear that Nicole had similar healing properties to Bulshar, only quite slower. A bullet wound that would close in seconds with Bulshar would take a minute or so for Nicole. She tried, it was not pleasant, but at the same time it was a useful discovery. 

Nicole volunteered a lot at homeless shelters, and stay animal ones too. She looked at them and felt a connection because in reality, she was just a stray too.

* * *

It was the last phone call Waverly and Nicole had that really stung for both of them.

“It's been two years Nicole.” Waverly spoke after the pleasantries were finished. 

“I know, I'm sorry.” Nicole replied as best she knew how.

“Don't be, I just miss you.” Nicole could almost hear Waverly wrap her coat around herself a little tighter.

“I miss you too.” Nicole agreed timidly. “I'm just not there yet...” 

“I know,and I'm still here, whenever you're ready.”

“I love you, Waves.”

“I love you too, Nicole.”

Despite Waverly's understanding, it hurt. It made Nicole feel guilty for leaving Waverly high and dry, because it wasn't fair, it wasn't. It made her sad that she went home to an empty hotel room every night, instead of coming home. It made her angry with herself for not being able to cope or figure everything out. More than anything, it scared Nicole, because what if she never was ready to go back?

* * *

Nicole was traveling back towards Edmonton towards the three year mark, when her phone buzzed. 

She smirked when she saw the message and she immediately took the next turn to the next highway.

The drive was long and horrible in the winter weather, but it was worth it to Nicole, who only stopped for gas and coffee. 

Soon she pulled into the familiar town that she had only visited a few times before. And then, at ten a.m. on the dot, Nicole pulled up in front of Gus's apartment complex. 

The red head officer walked up to the door and didn't even have to knock before Gus opened up. Not a moment later, Nicole was greeted by a beautiful baby brunette girl in a black stetson that made her look like a perfect combination of her parents. 

“Wow, don't you look grown up.” Nicole told the young toddler. 

“You're Auntie Nic!” Alice-Michelle cheered as she ran to the side and grabbed the photo Nicole had brought the day before she turned into Bulshar. 

“Yes I am, little one, it's been a long time since I saw you. You couldn't even walk yet!” Nicole exclaimed happily for the little girl. 

“I'm going to go see my Mama and my Papa?” Nicole nodded. 

“You're going to live with them, and Gus is going to come to Purgatory soon too!” Alice ran around and squealed happily.

“Are you ready?” Nicole asked excitedly. Alice shook her head mischievously.  
“Nuh uh, you help!” Alice pulled Nicole in who looked at Gus in confused betrayal as the older woman left Nicole to the wrath of the child. 

“I've been at this for nearly four years, tag, you're it.” Nicole sat on the couch as Alice ran around to pack a large suitcase of clothes and a couple boxes smaller boxes of toys and stuffed animals, she got Nicole's help every time she couldn't figure out how to “fold” something. 

“Auntie Nic, does Auntie Waverly like you the way Mommy likes Papa and Uncle X?” Nicole laughed at the fact that Gus probably told the child all about Wynonna's torn affections.

“Yeah, and I like her like that too.” Nicole told the child truthfully. 

“I don't like kissing.” The child stated simply and Nicole was happy that she wasn't off put by her relationship with Waverly. “Why not I go home til now?” Nicole was shocked at how easily the child jumped from one topic to another.

“There were a lot of bad people who didn't like your Mama and Papa, and if they knew that your Mama and Papa had you, they would hurt you to hurt them. But your Mama is very strong and brave and she beat all of the bad guys, and she is so excited to have you home and have a big camp fire.”

“That so cool! You a police man right Auntie Nic?” Nicole nodded a big smile on her face. 

“Yeah, but your Papa is a cowboy! And Uncle Jeremy is a scientist. Your Mama and Uncle X are kind of like spies. Auntie Waverly is super smart, and really nice, she does a lot of reading and she studies a lot to help your Mama and Uncle X.” Nicole gushed and then Alice ran off before she trotted back with the blanket in her arms.

“What about them? Why does she have cool eyes? And why is he not happy?” Nicole looked sadly at the cartoons before the flashbacks hit her of how she killed Rosita and Perry.

“She was one of the bad people, but she was nice and she helped your mom fight them, and your family is pretty weird, but he wasn't, so he's just surprised at how goofy we were!”

“Will I meet them too? No one talks 'bout them.” Nicole sighed.

“No, Alice, you won't meet them, they aren't around any more and they don't visit.” The little girl waited a minute.

“Are they in Heaven like Uncle Curtis?” Nicole nodded. 

“Yes, and they'll be happy there.” Her lie hurt herself as she remembered Hell swallowed Rosita whole. Her scarred hand hurt just at the memory of how Peacemaker violently heated up, of how that knife should have caught fire at how much it boiled as it tried to prevent her from killing the woman. 

“Oh woah!” Little Alice saw the scars and was in awe. “How'd THAT happen?” Nicole wanted to tell the truth that at one point, she was one of the bad guys too, but it wouldn't change anything.

“That's what happens if you aren't safe with the oven.” Nicole whispered before both girls laughed. 

“Are you ready?” Nicole asked, Alice-Michelle sprinted around the apartment while she cheered in the affirmative. 

Gus put in the car seat as Nicole carried down the boxes and filled the rest of the back seat. Gus buckled in Alice-Michelle and kissed her goodbye before she stood face to face with Nicole. 

“You sure you're ready to go back?” Gus asked. 

“I was already on my way.” Nicole confirmed as she gave Gus a hug. The young red head got in her car and drove.

The drive to Purgatory was phenomenal, Alice loved to sing in the car even if she didn't know the words. They would stop so Nicole could get a coffee and the little one would devour the food she'd get. (Pancakes, the last three stops in a row by the way.)

A lot of the drive, Alice slept but awoke with a yawn when they were merely and hour away from the homestead. 

Nicole handed back a container of pancakes to the hungry three year old. 

“Why did Aunt Gus ask if you were ready to come back?” Alice asked while they were minutes from the “Welcome to Purgatory” sign. 

“Because even though I love your Auntie Waverly, I left Purgatory a while ago, and I haven't been back, I was scared of the bad people.” Nicole admitted, because in a way she was, she was scared of herself. 

“So you're okay now because they're gone, just like me!” Nicole laughed and nodded.

“Just like you.” Nicole smiled wide as she saw the sign. “Hey, Alice.” The woman drew the little girl's attention forward and away from her stetson. “Welcome to Purgatory.” The little girl squealed and cheered. Nicole rolled down the window as she saw a certain someone outside the Police Department.

“I'll need that job Nedley!” Nicole yelled out as they slowly drove by, they sped up and the Sheriff let out a celebratory cheer. Soon the message that Nicole Haught was back ravaged Purgatory, for better or for worse.

Less than half an hour later, Nicole puled up to the homestead. 

“Now welcome home, Alice-Michelle Earp, this is the Earp Homestead.” Nicole honked at the large group on the porch and Waverly sprinted out even before they were parked. Nicole shot out of the vehicle and met Waverly, who was in a large winter coat and Nicole's stetson. The red head used her strength in the best possible way when she threw Waverly up a little and spun her girlfriend around happily. They squealed and told each other I love you's before they kissed passionately and hugged again. Nicole got a good look at Waverly and even Alice heard her exclaim “You have bangs!?” Waverly giggled as Nicole complimented her repeatedly.

Nicole told Waverly to wait as she went to the back door of her car. 

“You ready, Little cowgirl?” Nicole asked as she unbuckled the seat, Alice nodded eagerly and put on her hat proudly and picked up her Peacemaker water-gun before Alice leaped out of the car and ran to Wynonna and Doc. The couple dropped to their knees and began to cry, they had to tell Alice that they were happy tears and that they loved her so much and that they were sorry. 

During Doc and Wynonna's first encounter with Alice, the Widow returned to Nicole for the first time in years. Surprisingly, Nicole wasn't scared as she listened to the Widow whisper insults in her ear, Nicole simply turned to face the fragment of her imagination and smiled.

“Fuck you.” It was simple, it was quiet, and it worked. The Widow disappeared and Nicole felt it in her heart that that particular demon was gone, even if the others weren't.

Waverly came over and brought Nicole over to the group, this was a family occasion Nicole was NOT missing out on.

Alice got to meet every member of the Earp family, and Jeremy was shocked as the little girl wrapped her arms around his legs and cheered what sounded like “Uncle Cherry Tree!”, his happy reaction to the exclamation made everyone laugh. Alice immediately hit it off with her Auntie Waverly, and Dolls' utter panic at the hug Alice gave him was awe inducing, but of course it was Wynonna and Doc who the child clung to the most. She was excited to be with her parents as her parents were to be with her. 

Eventually, Wynonna handed off her child to Doc and came over to where Nicole had cracked a beer in the kitchen.

“Hi Nicole.” She acknowledged properly.

“Hi.” Nicole smiled warmly at the woman in front of her.

“I-um... I'm sorry. I beat the shit out of you and I had no right. I was ready to get you out of my life, and honestly, these past couple years have proven that with you around, shit's a lot better. I just,” Wynonna huffed out as she tried to search for the right thing to say. “I clung to Waverly like a lifeline and that wasn't fair to your relationship. You brought back my daughter, you sacrificed so much. I was dick, and you didn't deserve any fraction of it.” Wynonna confessed and apologized. “I never said sorry, not properly. So I am now, I'm sorry Nicole.”

“For a long time I thought that I only deserved to be angry, I thought the fact that you beat the shit out of me was valid. But I learned better, Wynonna. And I appreciate the apology.” On cue, Waverly came back from the washroom and came to hug Nicole's side. The older Earp and Nicole shared an understanding nod before Wynonna left to Alice. 

“Isn't it amazing.” Waverly purred into Nicole's side.

“It really is.” The officer said as she rubbed a comforting hand on Waverly's arm. 

“Ever think about it?” The young Earp looked up at Nicole who had quirked her brow. “Kids, I mean.”

“Waves, I can't-” Then it hit Nicole for the first time since she'd beat Bulshar. She wasn't his throne anymore, she could have a kid. “Of course I've thought about it, especially with you.”

“Maybe one day we should try.” Waverly placed a kiss on Nicole's lips before the two women returned to the group. Nicole would like nothing more.

That night Alice lit the fire, Nicole pulled out Ward's guitar, and the campfire sing along happened yet again. Jeremy did a science experiment to make the little one happy, Doc got flabbergasted when Alice asked why he didn't have a horse (a question he would like answered himself), Nicole told stories of her time away, and so did Wynonna and Waverly. Everyone was happier than they'd ever been.

Not only were they home, they were whole.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is it. Thank you to those who have stuck with this story, and even those who haven't. I hope you enjoyed it.


End file.
